


Endurance

by Chameleon777



Series: Inner Loss [4]
Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Cardassian Culture, Court Martial, Dysfunctional Family, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Ethics, F/M, Family Fluff, Implied/Referenced Torture, Injury Recovery, Legal Drama, Love, M/M, Major Character Injury, Nightmares, Post-Canon, Post-Canon Cardassia, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, Rape Recovery, Recovery, Unethical Experimentation, Unethical Medicine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:46:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 12
Words: 39,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28044153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chameleon777/pseuds/Chameleon777
Summary: The new Bashir-Garak family addresses what has happened to Julian and how their longstanding commitment to each other has affected everyone around them. The family must also contend with the unrest that has erupted between Starfleet and Cardassia because of the obvious moral corruption within Starfleet.
Relationships: Julian Bashir/Elim Garak
Series: Inner Loss [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1879732
Comments: 5
Kudos: 10





	1. Awakening

**Two Days Later**

**Cardassia**

Several bags had been packed and they were sitting in the middle of the living room while Elim loaded a small shoulder bag with all the money had had hidden in the house, personal documents, Kukulaka, identification, and paperwork that gave him the right to make medical decisions for Julian.

The house was Tain’s, so Elim wouldn’t necessarily miss it. He would, however, miss Cardassia for however long he and his new family had to be away. At least it was summer on Earth and warm.

Cardassia wasn’t home, though, without Julian and Ricky and Elim knew that. He had asked Kelas to house-sit for him while they were away because Kelas himself slept in the hospital whenever there was a bed free rather than sleep in the Tents. Castellan Dramok had also tasked Elim with representing Cardassia to the Federation to see if a peace could come out of what had happened. The Castellan had gone a step further and had asked his wife to serve as a medical advocate for Julian to Starfleet because it was important that Starfleet saw and respected Julian as someone who had survived a deep trauma. She would ensure that they didn't overwhelm him, push too hard, or try to do anything against the original agreement.

Myrina Staveli and most of the crew, save a very few, had surrendered themselves to the Enterprise and the Castellan had reluctantly allowed the Enterprise to take them into custody simply because Cardassia’s prison wasn’t secure. The Lionheart had since left Cardassia, but her former crew had been treated humanely by the Enterprise and all who came had accepted their charges quietly. The O'Briens would also be going with them, as Keiko needed to meet with Starfleet about the next phase of the Botanical Restoration Project. The Castellan was all for her and Elim overseeing it as they were able, but he didn't want Starfleet doing anything more until they officially apologized for what they had done to Julian-Bashir Garak. Castellan Dramok had been angry enough with the Federation and Starfleet over the whole situation that he had given exclusive interviews to Jake Sisko and now wanted him to send the information out to whoever would read it. Jake was also travelling on the Enterprise as far as Bajor so he could publish his stories about Cardassia's need for aid and reunite with his stepmother and little sister. There hadn't been news about Nog's memorial, so he was curious about that too.

A combadge hung on Elim’s shirt and Elim found himself gazing at it. He had been instructed to tap it and say that he was ready to go after he had packed, but was he _really_ ready to go to Earth?

_Knock, knock, knock._

Elim looked up from the combadge just in time to see Kelas come into the house with an old duffel slung over one shoulder, “I thought you’d be gone well before the sun rose,” Kelas said warmly.

“It took longer to pack what I thought we’d need,” Elim spoke nervously, his expression anxious as he looked at his friend. “Doctor Crusher _promised_ she wouldn’t wake Julian til I was there…”

Kelas looked thoughtful, “You’re _worried,_ ” he observed softly. “About everything…”

“ _Yes_ ,” Elim admitted quietly, sighing irritably. “I _suppose_ I should get going, though.”

Kelas nodded and Elim tapped the badge on his chest, “This is Legate Garak,” he spoke in a calm voice, assuming a neutral expression. “Please beam me and my bags up to the Enterprise.”

“Safe travels, my friend,” Kelas whispered as Elim and his things vanished. “To _all_ of you.”

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

_“...I put Ricky in that strange schoolroom with that impudent teacher if only so Julian would have me by his side when he wakes! Your android commander also graciously took our bags to our quarters!”_

Warmth filled Julian’s body as the hiss of a hypospray filled his ears and he found himself slowly becoming aware of his surroundings. A familiar, scaly hand suddenly slipped into his own.

At first, Julian’s vision was blurry and so he blinked. When he opened his eyes again, he came face to face with a woman he recognized to be Dr. Beverly Crusher. Dr. Crusher smiled gently at him, but Julian suddenly felt panicked because he wondered if he was being experimented on yet again.

“Julian, _breathe_ ,” Julian heard Elim’s voice speak. “I am right here beside you, my beloved.”

Julian turned his head towards the noise and relaxed when he saw Elim seated beside the bed, holding his hand, “Elim,” he spoke in a weak voice. “Where…where are we?”

“We’re on the Enterprise-E, dearest,” Elim spoke softly, sighing. “On our way to Earth.”

Julian frowned, deeply confused, “Why?” he asked softly, wincing as he inhaled sharply. “Ow.”

“You need to rest now or Doctor Crusher _will_ have my head,” Elim spoke firmly. “Relax.”

Julian sighed weakly, “Why can’t I move anything?” he asked weakly. “My legs…”

“You suffered breaks to both your ankles and internal injuries, so you’re in a stasis field from the waist down so your body can rest,” Dr. Crusher explained gently, coming into view. “You…”

Elim sighed heavily, “Julian, _my love_ , you were given a drug and sexually assaulted,” he spoke in a quiet voice, his expression somber. “Commander Data analyzed your attacker’s DNA and found that it belonged to Sarina Douglas. You might not be able to remember the assault because of the drug…”

Grief filled Julian’s face, “I told her I miscarried and she… _raged_ ,” he managed to say weakly.

Elim gently stroked Julian’s face with his other hand, “ _Shh, my love_ ,” he replied softly. “If you behave yourself, maybe I can convince the good doctor to release you to our temporary quarters so you can sleep safely in my arms. Until then, I will sit here with you. Our son is being cared for.”

Julian’s hand suddenly went to his temple because he felt something there, “Take it off,” he mumbled in an anxious voice, feeling the weight of the Romulan mind probes. “ _Please…take it off_!”

Elim’s hands grabbed Julian’s hand away from his temple, “ _Shh_ ,” he spoke gently. “You’re _safe_.”

“Feels…like Romulan mind probes,” Julian exhaled shakily. “Admiral Ross…used them…on me.”

Elim’s expression hardened and Dr. Crusher looked horrified, but Elim spoke a few phrases of Kardasi in a soothing tone. Julian exhaled before closing his eyes to try and relax himself.

“I do not think he will get _any_ rest here,” Elim mused once he was sure Julian was back asleep. “We’ve shared quarters in the past and the night always ended with me merely sitting in bed with him and holding him so he could sleep safely. He tends to have nightmares about the past _quite often_.”

Dr. Crusher sighed, knowing that the Cardassian had a point, “Let me consult with Doctor Grayson-Dramok,” she replied with a sigh. “I think she and her guard are settled into their quarters by now.”

“I’m assuming Officer Marratt has to talk to the crew of the Lionheart anyway, so Mary might have time on her hands,” Elim spoke softly, not looking up from his husband’s sleeping form.

Dr. Crusher nodded, “Just make sure your husband rests for now and I’ll see what I can do to make things easier for both of you,” she spoke calmly. “If I were to eventually release him to quarters, could you handle caring for both him and your son by yourself? I can also arrange for childcare.”

“Ricky is one of the few things that calms Julian’s nerves,” Elim replied softly, sighing. “If Julian needs rest, I can simply ask Chief O’Brien and his wife to care for the toddler because they’re trusted. Ricky’s divergencies means that he will no doubt be nervous towards strange individuals.”

Dr. Crusher looked thoughtful, “And what about _you_?” she asked. “Chief O’Brien mentioned a panic attack…”

“ _Spare me_ your diagnosis, Doctor,” Elim cut her off gently. “ _I will get rest if I require it_.”

Dr. Crusher doubted that very much, but she elected not to press it for the time being until she was able to talk to Julian’s medical advocate, “I’ll be nearby if you need anything,” she spoke softly.

Nodding, Elim quietly reached into his shoulder bag, retrieved Kukulaka, and set him on Julian’s chest in hopes that the bear would provide comfort. He then took Julian’s hand and gently kissed it.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

A door chime filled the air of the quarters where Captain Staveli had been placed on ‘house arrest’ for the duration of the journey to Earth. She had been surprised at the humane treatment she and her crew had received upon surrendering to the Enterprise, but she had instructed her crew to submit to arrest without protest. Since Admiral Ross wouldn’t take responsibility for engineering the crimes against Julian Bashir, Captain Staveli and her crew would explain what they had done instead. Some of the crew hadn't come and although hurt, Myrina had accepted their decision in silence.

“Come in,” Captain Staveli spoke in a quiet voice, not rising from the couch simply because she was focused on looking through the PADD’s and data rods that she had preserved out of all of her things.

The doors slid open and Captain Staveli was surprised to see Commander Data and an unfamiliar woman, sporting doctor’s scrubs and a white coat, come into the room. Data offered a nod.

“Commander…Data,” Myrina remembered softly as she rose. “The one who took us all into custody.”

Data nodded, “I can confirm that all of the crew who did beam over with you are quite safe and cared for in their quarters,” he replied tonelessly. “They did, however, report that you were injured.”

“Come to patch me up before the Cardassians on board tear me to shreds again?” Myrina asked in a quiet, slightly nervous voice as her expression hardened. “I know there are _at least two_ of them here and _goodness knows_ we all deserve it for the mess we put ourselves in by helping Admiral Ross.”

The woman sighed, “I’m Doctor Grayson-Dramok,” she cut in. “A physician for the Interspecies Medical Exchange and wife of the Castellan of Cardassia. I can _assure_ you, Captain Staveli, that there will be _no violence_ between Cardassians and Bajorans on this ship. It _won’t_ be tolerated.”

“As a prisoner, you have the right to know how things will proceed,” Data explained calmly. “While Doctor Grayson-Dramok examines and treats your injuries, I shall provide a proper explanation.”

Nodding, Myrina sat on the couch and allowed Data and the doctor to give her necessary help and information.


	2. The Pains of Indifference

**One Day Later**

**Deep Space Nine**

Stephen Drammell, former resident of the New Zealand Penal Colony and draft deserter, was now officially the commander for Deep Space Nine. Admiral Ross had gathered the personnel together and had promoted the man on the spot before turning him over to Colonel Kira for a quick rundown on how things worked. Since then, Admiral Ross had taken up residence on the Lionheart and had tried to calm the hysterical Sarina down to the point where he had simply had to sedate her.

After sedating her, he had told the infirmary she had been exhibiting symptoms of a non-contagious illness and had turned her over to them. Once he was alone with the skeleton crew who had stayed behind, Admiral Ross’s priority had changed to reclaiming Julian Bashir from the Enterprise-E.

Sighing, Admiral Ross gazed around the Bridge of the Lionheart in disgust. He would never be able to sink his claws back into Julian Bashir with such a _pathetic_ little ship and would need to either sell the ship and force the crew to accept it or hijack one of the ships passing through using his authority as a Starfleet Admiral. Either way, he _would_ get what he wanted and get Julian Bashir _back_.

“Admiral Ross, this is Captain Drammell,” a voice suddenly filled the air. “I, um, have some questions about Starfleet protocol that Colonel Kira isn’t able to answer. Can we meet?”

Admiral Ross rolled his eyes and sighed irritably before tapping his combadge, “Meet me at the airlock and we can talk in the Promenade,” he replied as he stood. “I’ll be right there. Ross out.”

None of the Bridge crew, who had been at their posts since hurriedly completing repairs at phaser-point, acknowledged Ross’s exit and he was fine with that. He had verbally raked them over the coals for their stunt at Cardassia and had every intention of working them like the dogs he saw them to be.

It didn’t take long for Admiral Ross to step out of the airlock and true to his word, Captain Drammell was standing there in his new command red with a nervous expression on his face, “I…I’m scared, sir,” Drammell spoke in a nervous tone. “ _All_ of Starfleet knows I spent time in _prison_ and I…”

“This is your posting and you _will_ grow into it!” Admiral Ross spoke firmly, glaring daggers at the scatterbrained officer. “Prison has made you _soft and scatterbrained_ , I know, but _get over it_!”

Drammell stammered, “I _don’t think_ I can do this, sir,” he admitted in a nervous, shaky voice as he paled and took a step back. “I should have just offered my hands in the relief efforts…”

“I did not give you parole, hire a _penniless_ Bajoran crew, and go to all the trouble of kidnapping and torturing Julian Bashir just so you could develop a _childish sense of remorse_!” Admiral Ross snapped in an upset voice, glaring at him. “What’s done is done and you’re gonna have to live with it!”

Drammell suddenly paused and looked to the side, sighing as Colonel Kira, a stern looking Bajoran woman, and a pair of stern looking Starfleet officers stepped out of the shadows, “We have his confession on record,” Colonel Kira spoke in a cold voice. “Thank you, Captain Drammell.”

Admiral Ross’s eyes narrowed as Drammell reached into his pocket and extracted what appeared to be a listening device. He handed the device to Colonel Kira and silently took another step back.

“You’re _under arrest_ ,” Colonel Kira spoke in a stern voice before looking at the guards. “Take him.”

As the guards moved to take Admiral Ross into custody, Colonel Kira walked over to Captain Drammell, “Doing what is right is never easy, but you did it,” she spoke in a quiet voice.

“I’ll accept responsibility if I’m asked to,” Drammell promised nervously. “Even if I lose all this.”

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

_Admiral Ross reached into his pocket and pulled out a couple of devices Julian recognized as Romulan mind probes, the same he himself had been interrogated with the year before. Admiral Ross scowled at his expression._

_“I take it you remember these,” Admiral Ross replied frostily as he attached the probes to Julian’s temples. “I got them from what Luther Sloan left behind after you and Chief O’Brien murdered him. You’re an illegal Augment and a traitor to the Federation. What information did you give Cardassia?”_

The weight on his temple was proving too much and Julian gagged as he reached up and ripped the item off. A loud alarm suddenly sounded and Julian cringed, turning just in time to lose the contents of his stomach on the Sickbay floor. Anxiety filled his body and he slowly forced himself into a sitting position, almost immediately doubling over in pain because the movement was too much.

Almost immediately, Julian felt someone grab him and he screamed as loud as he could manage with a severely weakened body, “You’re _all right_!” he heard an anxious voice shout. “Legate…!”

A stronger pair of arms suddenly caught him in an embrace and Julian’s eyes flew open. He found himself staring at Elim, who looked rested and was in clean clothes, “Julian,” Elim spoke softly.

“What…what…happened?” Julian managed to ask breathlessly. “I…felt something on my temple.”

Elim sighed patiently, “You had night terrors and ripped your neurocortical monitor off, which triggered an alarm,” he explained gently. “You also took a swipe at a nurse when….”

“Oh…oh, _God_ ,” Julian stammered shakily, tears filling his eyes. “I…I almost _hurt_ someone?!”

Muttering filled the room and Elim turned his head towards the nurse, “And _why_ did you grab him _so aggressively_ when you _knew_ what he had been through?!” he spat angrily, an expression of pure disgust on his face. “I _do_ recall Doctor Crusher telling all the staff to be _gentle_ with my husband!”

Martinez, the medical assistant who had been assigned to Sickbay that evening even though he had heard Starfleet’s dogma about Bashir and was afraid of him, bristled, “He’s an _Augment_ and I had to use _force_ to _keep control_!” he argued anxiously. “Starfleet said he _is illegal and dangerous_!”

The doors suddenly slid open and Dr. Crusher hurried in, having been alerted by Martinez to Bashir’s behavior, “What happened?” she asked in a concerned voice, frowning when she saw Elim holding Julian in his arms while glaring daggers at Martinez. “You said Doctor Bashir was violent?”

“I was here and saw Julian experience a nightmare before being grabbed roughly by that _awful excuse_ for a medical assistant,” Elim spat, his expression upset. “I was napping on another bed…”

Dr. Crusher gave Martinez a look before moving over to Julian and only then did Elim step away so she could look at Julian herself. Julian shuddered at being let go, but he didn’t say anything.

“The feeling of the neurocortical monitor must have triggered terrible flashbacks,” Dr. Crusher spoke softly as she examined Julian’s neck and saw it bleeding. “You were quite rough with yourself.”

Julian exhaled, “If Martinez wants to press charges…” he managed to say in a faint voice.

“No, you didn’t do any harm and I instructed all my staff to treat you gently,” Dr. Crusher replied in a gentle, but firm voice, gazing at Julian gently. “I noticed in your file that after Ricky was born, you were on a mood stabilizer that you were forced to discontinue because of the war. Did you want…?”

Julian shook his head, “If Sarina _did_ manage to make me pregnant again, _I can’t and won’t_ risk hurting it,” he spoke in a shaky voice as a wave of dizziness overtook him. “I’m a bit dizzy…”

Dr. Crusher nodded and helped Julian lie back down, “I can give you a relaxant that won’t harm any potential foetal development,” she offered gently. “Your level of anxiety isn’t good for your…”

“I…I’m _not ready_ for another child,” Julian blurted out anxiously, exhaling. “I…I’m not…”

Elim looked thoughtful, as he had known that for a while, but had never heard Julian openly acknowledge anything so deep before, “I…I was told I had growths in my reproductive systems and they removed them on Cardassia, but I never got to finish my treatments…” Julian spoke shakily.

“I’ve been conferring with Doctor Grayson-Dramok about that and she got doses of the medicine from Doctor Dastra before we left Cardassia,” Dr. Crusher explained. “We both wanted to wait, though, until you were healed from your injuries. This medicine is similar to chemotherapy…”

Julian exhaled, “And it could _hurt_ the baby if there is another one,” he spoke weakly. “Oh, _God_.”

Elim inched closer to the bed, sidestepping around the vomit, “Doctor Crusher, is there a way Julian could be released to our quarters?” he asked softly. “After today’s incident, I feel I have to ask.”

Thoroughly exhausted from throwing up and panicking, Julian closed his eyes and tuned out the sounds of Dr. Crusher and Elim talking. He would only rest for a _moment_ … _only a moment_.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

“… _I assure you, Legate Garak, I will speak with Mister Martinez and the rest of the crew about how Doctor Bashir-Garak is to be treated_ ,” Julian heard a brisk voice say as he slowly regained consciousness. “ _I’d also like to talk to you about accommodations for you once we reach Earth_ …”

As Julian’s eyes opened, he suddenly realized that the noises associated with Sickbay were noticeably absent. He could hear soft talking in the next room and he…was in a starship bedroom.

A quick glance down at himself told him that he was in clean pajamas and holding Kukulaka in the crook of his arm while a dripfeed line was taped to his hand. He suddenly heard a quiet gasp.

Julian frowned as Elim suddenly came into the room with a small tray bearing a bowl of soup and some apple juice, “ _Good_ , you’ve woken in time for breakfast,” Elim spoke calmly. “I shooed the Captain away with a promise of meeting with him later once I get someone to sit with you.”

“I fell asleep in _Sickbay_ ,” Julian replied softly. “Does Doctor Crusher know where I am?”

Elim nodded and sat on the bed before setting the tray down on the bed, “Doctor Crusher and I had a _little conversation_ and the end result was that you will be spending the rest of your time aboard the Enterprise in _safe_ quarters,” he spoke in a reassuring voice. “Ricky will join us after school.”

Julian nodded, “I hope he likes school,” he spoke softly, sighing. “I _tried_ to tutor him privately on Deep Space Nine, but the war was happening and I lost control after Sisko questioned my ability…”

“Oh, _trust me_ , I am aware of all of that,” Elim replied firmly, his expression calm. “Now, my dear, you need some _nutrition_ in your body before we talk about what is yet to come. Let me feed you.”

Julian remained quiet as he was fed the soup and juice, the taste of each proving both a blessing and a curse because he hadn’t eaten in so long that he wasn’t used to the process of eating. Once the food and drink were gone, Elim set the tray aside and gently took Julian’s hands in his own.

“After the incident last night, I took the liberty of speaking with Captain Picard and your medical advocate so I could make sure you were treated humanely during the court-martial,” Elim explained in a soothing voice. “I’m hopeful I can contact one of the O’Briens in a little while to…”

The door chime suddenly went off, “Come in,” Elim spoke crossly, not moving from the bed.

Julian frowned as Captain Picard and Counselor Troi suddenly came into the room, “Elim, help me to the living room,” he spoke in a faint voice. “The Captain’s here and he obviously wants to talk.”

Elim studied Julian for a moment before nodding and helping Julian out of bed, revealing to him that there were gray walking casts on both his feet, “Doctor Crusher says you can walk _with assistance_ , but _not too much_ ,” Elim explained at Julian’s horrified expression. “Take it slow now, dearest.”

Julian managed to make it to the living room sofa before needing to sit and Elim sat next to him while Picard and Troi both took chairs, “Captain, I _thought_ we were to meet later?” Elim asked.

“We were, but I just received word from Deep Space Nine that Admiral Ross was taken into custody after admitting his involvement in your husband’s abduction and torture,” Captain Picard explained in a serious voice, his expression equally serious. “Starfleet will take charge of extraditing Admiral Ross back to Earth so he can take responsibility for what he has done. There’s something else…”

Troi looked at Julian worriedly, as she sensed anxiety in him, “That’s…good news,” Julian spoke in a nervous voice, his expression tired. “Captain, I won’t deny what I did to Luther Sloan last year…”

“It _cannot and should not_ be used as excuse for what you suffered at the hands of Admiral Ross,” Captain Picard spoke in a firm voice, cutting him off. “As I was saying, someone else came forward when they heard about what happened to you. They admitted their words may have triggered this entire situation.”

Julian nodded, but said nothing, “That’s all Starfleet told me, but I will be talking to them later today and hopefully be able to give you more information after I do,” Captain Picard spoke calmly. “Your medical advocate is currently in conference with those who are going to be overseeing your court-martial and she’ll ensure that you won’t be put through unfair process. I’ll talk to Starfleet after that.”

“Doctor Bashir-Garak, if you feel like you need to talk to someone about all this, I can come visit you and Legate Garak can take a respite while we talk,” Troi offered. “I know all of this…”

Julian sighed softly. “Maybe when I have more strength,” he replied softly, realizing that he and Elim needed to eventually talk about what he had blurted out in Sickbay. “I’ve got a _lot_ on my mind.”

Troi nodded and she could immediately feel Julian closing himself off emotionally out of fear that he would hurt his husband, “Thank you for giving us this information, Captain,” Julian replied quietly.

Nodding, Picard stood, as did Troi, “We’ll let you get some rest,” he spoke in a kind voice.

Once Elim and Julian were alone, Julian exhaled, “A rest sounds lovely,” Julian spoke quietly.

Suddenly, the door chime sounded again, “ _Now who is it_?” Elim spoke crossly. “Come in.”

The doors slid open and Jake, who had heard about the upcoming court martial from the Federation News Service branch on Earth, came into the room. The young man looked like he had been crying, but he also looked determined to talk. Julian sighed and tried to appear as patient as possible even knowing that Jake probably wanted a story, as Jake had just lost Nog and needed compassion.

“Hi there, Julian, Garak,” Jake spoke nervously as he planted himself in a chair. “How are you?”

Elim sighed calmly, “We should be asking you that same question,” Julian cut in softly.

“I…I heard from the Federation News Service on Earth that your court-martial is going to be a big deal,” Jake spoke, purposely avoiding the question. “I was wondering if I could write articles about you both so that people wouldn’t just say bad things about you. You need someone to speak for you.”

Julian looked uneasy, “Don’t you want to try and go to Nog’s funeral?” he asked softly. “I’m sure you could get passage there from Bajor quickly. Nog was your best friend and you need to…”

“I’m kinda mad at Starfleet for the way they handled his death, actually,” Jake admitted with a sigh, his expression irritated. “He worked very hard and lost his leg in the war, but they passed off arrangements for his funeral to someone else? Between Nog’s death getting disrespected and you getting court-martialled for being on Cardassia, I’m not liking what Starfleet has become.”

Julian nodded and sighed, “It’s supposedly going to be a very simple process, but you can cover it and write articles to make us look better in the eyes of the public if you really want to,” he allowed in a quiet voice, feeling it would help Jake’s grief process. “How about we talk later or tomorrow?”

Jake smiled a smile that made the entire room seem brighter as he got up, “You’re the best, Julian!” he replied in an excited voice. “I’ll figure out what to ask and we’ll talk tomorrow, okay?”

Once Jake had left the room, Julian leaned against Elim and Elim promptly snaked his arms around his vulnerable, tired looking husband. Quiet filled the room as the two sat there in a silent cuddle.


	3. Closer to Home

**_U.S.S. Enterprise-E_ **

“…Julian, you _have to_ _wake up_ now,” Julian suddenly heard a gentle voice say.

Julian groaned, but opened his eyes and found that Elim was already awake, “If you want to keep resting, I can set you up on the couch or help you back to bed,” Elim spoke soothingly. “I have to go collect Ricky from school because I told the O’Briens that I would do that. What do you want?”

“I want to get our son from school with you,” Julian found himself saying softly even though he knew it was a lot for him to manage. “I miss him and I know I can’t pick him up yet, but…”

Elim paused for a moment and then nodded, “I’ll help you get some clothes on,” he replied calmly, knowing such a simple act was important to his husband. “I know just what to dress you in.”

Julian smiled and let his husband help him from the couch to the bedroom before submitting to Elim’s choice of clothing. The clothes were a simple pair of loose pants and a dark tunic and Julian was so grateful to be wearing clothes again that he let Elim fuss over his hair without complaining.

Once he was ready, Elim helped him out of their quarters and kept a firm hold on him as they moved down the corridor, took the lift to the proper floor, and made their way to the schoolroom. They entered the schoolroom and found most the other children already gone. Miss Kyle was sitting at a table with Ricky and Yoshi and watching as Ricky stared at a book while Yoshi played with clay. Molly was at a computer on the other side of the room, seemingly busy with a work program.

“Ricky, Elim brought Daddy to come get you from school,” Elim spoke in a calm voice.

Ricky looked up from the book and smiled at seeing Julian, “Doctor Bashir, _welcome_ ,” Miss Kyle spoke in a warm voice, offering the young doctor a flirtatious smile. “How are you doing?”

Julian’s smile faltered and he immediately inched back because he could immediately tell that Miss Kyle was trying to come on to him. Elim noticed the behavior immediately and grew worried.

“Julian, why don’t you go sit with Ricky?” Elim suggested softly. “Maybe read with him?”

Julian nodded before silently pulling away from Elim and taking slow steps over to the table where Ricky and Yoshi were. He sat next to Ricky and Ricky immediately offered him the book.

“Do you want me to read to you?” Julian asked softly, nodding as he took the book. “Okay.”

While Julian read to Ricky, Elim glared at Miss Kyle, “I’ll thank you to stop _flirting_ with my husband,” the Cardassian spoke in a firm voice, scowling. “Even if he wasn’t my husband, you flirting with him would be _inappropriate_ given the trauma he’s been through recently.”

“Oh, he’s _fine_ ,” Miss Kyle protested. “He’s just _reclusive_ because of what Martinez did in Sickbay!”

Julian tensed up at the words, but he kept reading because Ricky would no doubt get upset if he stopped, “Dada sad?” Ricky asked softly, startling Julian into silence. “Dada sad?”

Yoshi looked at Julian wide-eyed, “Ricky talk!” he replied in an eager voice, his expression shocked.

Molly suddenly hurried over to the table, “Julian, Ricky said words!” she spoke in an excited voice.

Ricky giggled and hugged Julian, “Molly, do you know when your mum or dad are coming to get you?” Julian asked softly, sighing. “Elim and I would like to take Ricky home, but…”

“I’m old enough to take Yoshi home from school,” Molly replied in a cheerful voice.

Julian nodded, not quite sure what to say because he could also heard Elim and Miss Kyle having a very heated discussion, “Molly, would you mind walking Ricky and I home?” he asked in a quiet voice, wondering if he could indeed manage that far of a walk without Elim’s assistance.

Molly nodded and Julian shakily got to his feet, “You two can argue all you like, but I think it’s time I take Ricky home,” he spoke in a slightly cross voice, giving Elim and Miss Kyle a look.

Julian reached for Ricky and gently pulled the toddler into a standing position, “You’re _going_ to _hurt_ yourself!” Elim protested in an upset voice, his expression aghast. “You’re not _supposed_ to lift…!”

“Ah, but the _petty bickering_ you and Miss Kyle are engaged in is _quite important_ , so I will have to _manage_ just like I did when I was _cast aside_ by you,” Julian spoke in a cold voice, scowling.

Elim looked as if he had been slapped and Miss Kyle looked apologetic. Julian, however, silently proceeded to guide Ricky from the room with his attention fully on the toddler’s steps. He was tired and slightly sore, but he was overwhelmed by what had happened and what was yet to come.

Instead of going back to their quarters, however, Julian took the lift to a different floor because he was desperate for some peace. He quickly found the holodecks and browsed through the programs before finding a simple library program that would allow them to spend quiet time together.

“Computer, activate _this_ program,” Julian spoke in a calm voice. “Come on, Ricky.”

Ricky babbled happily as they went into the simulated library and Julian chose a few children’s books from a shelf before finding a seat where he could put his feet up and have Ricky close. It was a bit of an effort to lift Ricky, but he managed before sitting down. He smiled as Ricky cuddled him.

Julian laid back on the seat and put an arm around his little son to hold him, his eyes closing as he did so because the trip to the schoolroom had been exhausting in itself. Ricky cooed and likewise closed his eyes because he was happy being held by his father. The books lay forgotten on Julian’s lap.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

Happy babbling filled Julian’s ears, but he remained asleep because he was comfortable and didn’t want to move, “Yes, Ricky, I _agree_ that your daddy looks _adorable_ ,” Elim’s voice crooned.

Groaning weakly, Julian opened his eyes and saw Elim sitting on the library seat next to him while Ricky sat between them, “It took a _while_ for me to find you,” Elim spoke calmly, sighing. “Julian, I owe you an apology. I engaged in bickering with Miss Kyle because I was protective and jealous…”

“And I _shouldn’t_ have said what I said either,” Julian interrupted groggily, his expression apologetic as he looked into his husband’s eyes. “I’m not recovering emotionally from what happened and I think I might actually reach out to Counselor Troi for a session if you wouldn’t mind…”

Elim looked thoughtful, “My dear doctor, if it will help you be able to handle what is yet to come, I am for you talking to the Enterprise’s counselor,” he replied softly. “Anyway, as I was trying to find you both, I was contacted by Captain Picard. He wants to have a talk with both of us over dinner.”

“Most likely about where we’re going to _stay_ during the court-martial,” Julian spoke with a sigh, a distressed expression filling his face. “I might be detained at Starfleet Security in a Brig, but I could give you credits so you and Ricky could get a hotel. No reason why you two shouldn’t be comfy.”

Elim scoffed, “Dear, _don’t be melodramatic_ ,” he replied even though he was worried about it.

Sighing, Julian slowly got up and set the books on the seat. Elim stood and scooped Ricky up.

“Computer, end program,” Julian ordered, walking to the exit with his family as the library vanished.

It didn’t take long for the family to make their way to the ship’s Mess, as Elim had been given a map of the ship by Picard and the Cardassian had memorized it while Julian rested. True to form, Captain Picard was waiting at a table that had plates full of food, cutlery, and glasses of juice on it. To their surprise, however, Commander Troi and Doctor Grayson-Dramok were also seated at the table.

Elim quickly deposited Ricky in a highchair at the other end of the table while Julian sat himself next to the highchair, “I hope you don’t mind that I took the liberty of having Cardassian cuisine made to help you all be more comfortable,” Captain Picard spoke as Elim sat next to Julian.

“That’s very kind of you, Captain,” Julian spoke softly, quickly turning his attention to feeding Ricky because he knew the toddler wouldn’t eat more than simple food on his own. “C’mon, Ricky, eat for Daddy.”

Ricky obeyed and Julian sighed, wondering if he was being scrutinized and judged for not eating, “I had Ricky assessed on Deep Space Nine with the help of Doctor Girani and he’s got _significant_ developmental delays,” Julian spoke nervously. “I lost custody at Starfleet’s order before I could make any real progress with him and Miles and Keiko were _wonderful_ foster parents, but…”

“Ricky’s developmental delays will be but a _memory_ once he gets involved in the Cardassian educational system,” Elim cut in, hating that Julian was babbling due to having guilt over Ricky’s delays when they were nobody’s fault. “We’re also going to work with him at our home.”

Julian exhaled and nodded timidly, “Um, Captain, how long will the court-martial take, exactly?” he asked in a nervous voice. “If…if I’m pregnant again, I want to be on _Cardassia_ for the duration of it.”

“President Zife wishes to hold both the court-martial and the trial for Admiral Ross during your visit so you aren’t having to return to Earth if you do not wish to once you are no longer a part of Starfleet,” Captain Picard spoke calmly, sighing. “As I said before, Doctor Bashir-Garak, I heard someone came forward confessing about their role in your abduction and President Zife has put them on supervised release until we reach Earth. The President wants all of us to have a meeting with the confessor.”

Julian frowned, but said nothing, “The person who came forward was your father, Richard Bashir,” Captain Picard spoke in a grim voice, eyeing Julian worriedly. “I’m _sorry_ to inform you of that.”

Counselor Troi frowned, suddenly sensing shock and sadness from both Elim and Julian, “Captain, perhaps we should pause the discussion here and eat dinner,” she spoke quietly. “We can resume the discussion in the briefing room afterwards. That way, more of the senior staff can also be there.”

“Very well,” Captain Picard acquiesced calmly, nodding at Julian and Elim reassuringly.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

“Commander Data did some looking into Stephen Drammell’s background and discovered that Richard Bashir and Stephen Drammell were on the same work program,” Miles spoke in a concerned voice as he, Julian, Ricky, Data, Picard, Troi, Elim, Dr. Crusher, and Dr. Grayson-Dramok sat together in the briefing room after dinner had finished in silence. “I…I was _curious_ and so I asked Data…”

Captain Picard nodded, as Miles didn’t have clearance to investigate like that on the computers and so it made sense to ask Data, “According to the record, Stephen Drammell was given parole by Admiral Ross shortly after the war ended and began overseeing his parole hearings prior to that not long after Richard Bashir was arrested,” Data explained tonelessly. “That’s all the record says.”

Julian’s heart was in pieces at the news; how could his own father participate in conspiring to hurt him? “I was aboard a _Bajoran vessel_ , though,” he spoke shakily. “My father _wasn’t_ there…”

“Captain Staveli’s been recovering from injury she received at Admiral Ross’s hand while on the Lionheart, but I believe she is ready for questioning this evening,” Captain Picard replied simply.

Julian sighed, “I’d _like_ to be present,” he replied softly, his expression sad. “I want to know _why_.”

Elim gave Julian a look, “You and I both know that it _isn’t_ a good idea for either of us to be present at the initial questioning,” he replied in a gentle, but firm voice. “Officer Marratt will be present, as will Doctor Grayson-Dramok and they _will_ tell us anything we need to know. What we _should_ do this evening, Julian, is retire to our quarters with Ricky and spend some _quiet time_ as a family…”

Julian paused before sighing, as he wanted to do nothing more than rest and process the fact that _his own father_ had _conspired_ to get him killed by Starfleet, “Okay,” he replied in a quiet, resigned voice.

“If there’s nothing else, you’re all dismissed,” Captain Picard spoke as he rose from his chair.

Julian waited until everyone but Elim and Troi, who had sensed Julian’s need to talk, had left the room, “Counselor, do you think I might be able to see you tomorrow for a session?” Julian asked in a quiet voice, his expression tired. “All of this is really very _overwhelming_ and I’m at a loss…”

“Of _course,_ ” Counselor Troi replied in a quiet, reassuring voice. “You’ve been through a great deal recently and there’s _no shame_ in needing to talk to a professional about everything.”

Nodding, Julian slowly got up and Elim followed, moving Ricky from his lap to his shoulder, “Well, my dear, shall we go to our temporary home?” Elim spoke calmly. “Good night, Commander Troi.”

As Julian left with Elim and Ricky, Troi couldn’t help but be concerned for the family and wanted to help them more than just the ship. She wanted to see if she could be on hand for the legal proceedings too. No doubt both men would _need_ support and possibly need someone to talk to there.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

The civilian named Jake Sisko had proved excellent company, Myrina thought to herself as she sat in her cell, listening to Jake talk about his father. Emissary Benjamin Sisko was revered among the Bajoran people and to visit with his son after enduring much loss was truly a tender mercy. Even though Jake was a civilian, he had learned of her and had offered to spend time with her. Myrina very much reminded Jake of Kira Nerys and his father and he missed both of them a great deal.

Jake suddenly offered her a smile as the doors to the Brig opened and Officer Marratt came into the room wearing his military uniform, “Oh, I _wasn’t aware_ you had a visitor,” he said gruffly.

“Jake is the son of the Emissary and is telling me of his father, Benjamin Sisko,” Myrina explained in a quiet voice, sighing. “I _heard_ of Emissary Sisko, but was _never given the opportunity_ to meet him. The visit was authorized providing we did not discuss what I was involved in or what is to come.”

Officer Marratt nodded, and Jake quietly excused himself from the room, “I see you’ve _healed_ from the injuries that disgusting Starfleet Admiral gave you,” the Cardassian officer spoke calmly.

Myrina nodded, but was prevented from speaking by the arrival of Captain Picard, Counselor Troi, Data, and Dr. Grayson-Dramok. Myrina rose from her cot and offered them all a polite nod.

“Commander Data will record the session,” Captain Picard explained calmly as Data activated a PADD to record the interview. “Since you’re feeling better, Captain Staveli, we _need_ to talk…”

Myrina nodded, “I _understand_ ,” she replied in a penitent voice. “Where would you like to start?”

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Deep Space Nine**

In the safety of the Prefect’s Office on Deep Space Nine, Captain Drammell’s heart was heavy as he turned off his computer. He had just been told by the President of the Federation that he would need to pay a visit to Earth to give his testimony about his participation in Julian Bashir’s violent ordeal and that the USS ibn Majid would come to escort him to Earth in the next twelve hours. Admiral Ross and Sarina had already been shipped off on a prison transport ship earlier that day.

The advantage of the Majid coming, Drammell mused, was that he would be able to connect with his old friend, Cristobal Rios. Cristobal had been his friend at the Academy and a friend would make the whole ordeal easier. Once the trial was over, Drammell would simply return to Deep Space Nine.

A curse word escaped Drammell’s lips as he caught his hand tremoring as it had before he had been released from jail. Richard Bashir had noticed his tremors and had helped him get through his daily work detail, so the two had gotten to talking. It was then that Drammell had learned about Richard’s illegal Augment son and grandson from an artificially created pregnancy.

Everything had _snowballed_ from there and Drammell had only agreed to Admiral Ross’s demands because he had been promised access to Starfleet’s best medicine. Once Drammell had agreed, however, Admiral Ross had gone back on his promise and had forced him along for the ride as they met up with the crew of the Lionheart on Bajor. The tremors and everything else had since gotten worse and all Drammell could do was try to ease his symptoms using simple Sickbay painkillers.

Since Admiral Ross and Sarina had gone, Captain Drammell had shied away from having an initial physical and had holed himself up in his new office claiming he needed to work. Truth be told, he didn’t want any sort of scan picking up his worsening symptoms. He had been the victim of a sneak attack during a shore leave on Earth right before the start of the war and had been beaten and given drugs that had left him with permanent aftereffects. No assailant had ever been identified and he had draft dodged to avoid entering the war with symptoms that could possibly result in catastrophe.

The doors suddenly slid open and Colonel Kira came into the office, “Captain Drammell, I’m sorry to bother you, but Doctor Girani contacted me saying you hadn’t been in for your initial physical,” she spoke in an official voice, frowning. “In case you’re not familiar with protocol here…”

“I’m _familiar_ with protocol, Colonel, but I’ll attend to getting a physical when the Majid comes to take me to Earth tomorrow,” Captain Drammell replied firmly, sighing. “Is there anything else?”

Colonel Kira frowned, “Are you all right?” she asked softly. “Your voice seems _shaky_.”

“It’s been a _long and stressful_ day,” Captain Drammell replied softly, hating that he was tired enough for the tremor to be apparent in his voice. “I may retire to my quarters for the night very soon.”

Colonel Kira nodded, “I can show you where those are if you like,” she offered kindly. “I know you’ve been too busy learning the ropes to go there, but I had your possessions moved from the Lionheart after Admiral Ross was arrested. Your quarters are not far into the Habitat Ring.”

Seeing that Colonel Kira wouldn’t leave him alone until he at least attempted to accept some of her hospitality, Captain Drammell nodded and slowly stood. He left his work on the desk as he followed her out through the Bridge and on to the Promenade. His body protested with aches, but he ignored it.

By the time he reached his quarters, Captain Drammell’s body was trembling and so he quickly sat on the couch in hopes it would prompt the Colonel to leave him in peace. Colonel Kira, however, stayed and gave him a once-over before sighing and offering him a very concerned look.

“Did you _think_ I’d _miss_ the note about the attack you suffered during your last shore leave?” Colonel Kira asked in a quiet voice, frowning at him. “It’s in your personal file and I’m betting it’s why you agreed to help Admiral Ross hurt Julian. I’ve noticed the odd tremors in your body and voice…”

Captain Drammell sighed, “ _Yeah_ ,” he replied in a resigned voice. “I was promised _medicine_ …”

Colonel Kira sighed, her expression sympathetic, “Does anyone else know?” she asked softly.

“Richard Bashir knew because he noticed the tremors and I _had_ to tell him,” Captain Drammell replied in a nervous voice. “I heard that he went to Starfleet about conversations we had and he’s going to try and take the hit for both of us. I just have to get the tremors under control and I can…”

Colonel Kira frowned, “Is there _anything_ I can do to help see you through this?” she asked softly.

“I just _want_ to do the right thing,” Captain Drammell replied in a tired voice. “While I can. This condition is _progressing_...”

At that point, Colonel Kira left with the intention of seeing what she could do to help him while protecting his right to privacy. It would take some work, but she would think of _something._


	4. Darker Designs

The remainder of the journey to Earth was quiet for the Bashir-Garak family mostly because Julian stayed in quarters with Ricky as much as he could. He took over tutoring Ricky privately because he couldn’t trust that Miss Kyle would treat him fairly being a disabled child and he knew that Elim and Miss Kyle didn’t get along. Ricky was perfectly content with the arrangement, but Elim was not.

Elim found it very concerning that Julian had taken to being a recluse and dragged Ricky along with him because of petty incidents. The Cardassian had spent a good deal of time awake when his family had slept messaging various people in both Starfleet and the Cardassian government with his concerns, but he hadn’t openly confronted Julian about it. Julian _wasn’t_ the problem, Elim reflected, others were.

Now, with no reply from anyone, Elim found himself focusing on keeping Ricky happy while helping Julian keep his nightmares at bay. It was early, though, so Elim was still in bed and wondering what they would do once it was time to leave. They had packed things up the day before in preparation to leave the Enterprise, but they had no idea where they were going to stay once they were off the ship.

A quiet sigh filled the air and Elim looked over to Julian’s side of the bed, frowning when he saw that Julian wasn’t there. The Cardassian quickly got up and froze when he saw that Julian standing at the window with his hands over his flat abdomen. His back was to Elim and he was clad only in simple pajamas with his healed feet bare. The man was also shivering and Elim was very worried.

Elim silently walked over to the window and gently engulfed Julian in a hug from behind, “My dear doctor, you’re freezing cold,” he spoke in a concerned voice. “Doctor Crusher told you…”

“I’m afraid of becoming pregnant from what happened,” Julian spoke in a quiet voice, sighing. “I can’t remember anything that happened with Sarina and I worry that it’s damaged us…our relationship.”

Elim scoffed, “My dear, you were _drugged and tortured_ ,” he spoke in a firm voice. “You were _not_ unfaithful _to me_ nor were you unfaithful to our vows. If you _are_ pregnant again as a result of what happened to you, I assure you that I will take the child as mine without any hesitation.”

Julian sighed, but didn’t respond immediately, “My feet are _killing_ me,” he finally said softly.

“Well, they’re probably freezing cold just like the rest of you,” Elim replied softly. “If you’re done with sleep, we should really get ready. In case you’ve forgotten, we have a meeting later today.”

Julian’s knees suddenly gave out, but Elim gently grabbed hold of him, “I’ve got you,” Elim said softly, sighing gently. “Julian, you were told that you wouldn’t be back at full strength for quite a while. I _can_ arrange a hoverchair for you if it would make the trip easier. I don’t mind one bit.”

“I…I think that might be a good idea,” Julian spoke weakly. “Can you help me sit down?”

Elim quickly ushered Julian back over to the bed and sat him down, “ _Oh_ , that’s better,” Julian spoke in a shaky voice, exhaling weakly. “I was warned I’d get weak spells at times for the next little while.”

“Are you going to be up for meeting with the President of the Federation?” Elim asked softly. “I can go alone and I can talk to the O’Briens about keeping you and Ricky company while I’m gone.”

Julian shook his head, “The hoverchair’s a compromise I’m willing to make,” he replied softly. “I’m _not willing_ to let you face the President of the Federation and my father alone, though. What time is it?”

Elim sat down next to Julian, “It’s _early_ ,” he replied softly. “What was your nightmare about?”

“I _wish_ I knew, but it scared me awake,” Julian replied softly. “I’m sorry I woke you, Elim.”

Elim sighed, “I was already awake, but lost in thought,” he admitted softly. “I don’t know anything about San Francisco or even Earth, I’m afraid. I’ve been trying to figure out where we’re all going to stay.”

Nodding, Julian leaned against Elim and closed his eyes, “My dear, return to bed and sleep a little more,” Elim spoke in a quiet, soothing voice. “I will check on our son and ensure we are ready to depart.”

“If I go back to sleep, I’ll have another nightmare,” Julian spoke softly, sighing. “I _know_ it.”

Suddenly, the door chime rang, “Odd, we’re not expecting anyone,” Elim said softly. “Should I…?”

A light snore filled the air and Elim realized that Julian had fallen asleep again using him as an involuntary pillow, “Come in!” he called out, not wanting to move and wake his husband up.

The doors opened and a moment later, Dr. Grayson-Dramok came into the room, “Did you know Ricky’s waking up?” she asked in a quiet voice. “Why is the crib in the living room anyway? I thought…”

“So Julian’s crying won’t wake him at night,” Elim spoke quietly. “We’ve managed so far…”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok nodded as Julian suddenly shuddered violently, “Doctor Bashir-Garak,” she spoke in a concerned voice, frowning when Julian opened his eyes and gagged. “Julian…you’re safe.”

Julian looked at Dr. Grayson-Dramok worriedly, “I…I’m safe,” he finally manage to say softly.

“I thought I’d drop by and help prepare you both for the meeting,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke in a kind voice, offering a smile. “I know it’s early, but Jhanathan always gets up early and I join him.”

Julian nodded, “I _c-can’t_ do it,” he replied softly, his voice shaking. “I thought I could talk to my father, but he…he was _actually_ involved in trying to get me killed. I’m going to faint or throw up or both…”

“Perhaps a visit to Sickbay might be in order,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke softly. “All right?”

Julian exhaled, but stood up, “I…I’d rather not until I’m sure it’s Doctor Crusher there,” he spoke in a nervous voice as he hobbled over to the closet where he had hung the day’s clothes. “Elim…”

The sound of a transporter being initiated filled the room and Julian’s eyes widened as he was suddenly beamed away, “Julian!” Elim called out in an anxious voice. “Is this some sort of a _prank_?!”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok quickly tapped her combadge, “Bridge, Doctor Bashir-Garak was just beamed from his quarters!” she announced in an anxious voice as Ricky suddenly started to cry loudly.

Swearing anxiously in Kardasi, Elim hurried into the next room and gently retrieved the sobbing Ricky from the crib. He held the frightened toddler close while Dr. Grayson-Dramok continued talking.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

_“He’s pretty weak for an Augment…”_

_“Just shut up and secure him to the table so the procedure can begin!”_

A hand smacked Julian’s face and Julian woke to see himself face-to-face with Admiral Ross, “Rise and shine, Doctor, we’ve got a busy day planned for you,” Admiral Ross spoke coldly. “Doctor Girani!”

To Julian’s horror, Dr. Girani appeared and offered him a smile, “How?!” Julian gasped anxiously, horrified to see one of his former colleagues in league with the Admiral. “The Admiral was _arrested_!”

“Prison transport ships are so easy to hijack nowadays,” Admiral Ross spoke in a soothing, patronizing tone as he leered at Julian. “And Doctor Girani insisted on following me from Deep Space Nine….”

Dr. Girani looked apologetic, “Doctor Bashir, I didn’t want to do this, but my new Captain is sick and my friend, Officer Martinez, said you were on the Enterprise headed for Earth,” she explained anxiously.

“ _Why me_?” Julian asked in a confused voice, frowning. “I _can’t_ help your captain…”

Admiral Ross swore, “I didn’t bring you here for Stephen Drammell!” he snapped angrily. “Regardless of what Doctor Girani believes, I brought you here to see if we can’t use your Augmented self for Starfleet’s gain! We _never_ got to finish our _experimentation_ on you that we started on the Lionheart!”

“Officer Martinez and I _didn’t_ agree to help you hurt Doctor Bashir!” Doctor Girani protested.

Admiral Ross grabbed hold of Dr. Girani and forced her out of Julian’s view, “Martinez is a _weak fool_ , which is _why_ I left him on the Enterprise!” he snapped angrily. “Bashir is a _dangerous Augmen_ t whose only purpose is to suffer the way Khan made many suffer years ago! Now give him the medicine and start the insemination process! The intelligence is all ready for you!"

Dr. Girani walked back over to the table, “I’m going to give you a little medicine that will make you sleepy and unable to feel _anything_ ,” she spoke in a shaking voice whilst sporting an uneasy expression. “I had only intended to get your blood to help Captain Drammell, but Admiral Ross wants me to artificially impregnate you to see how your body takes to it. Starfleet wants to make _others_ Carriers. I have intelligence from the Dominion on how they made you a Carrier...from the war.”

“So I’m being used to _recoup losses_?!” Julian asked in a weak voice. “You…you _don’t have to_ do this!”

Admiral Ross suddenly came into view again, “After you deserted Starfleet for Cardassia, you owe us,” he spoke in a stern voice. “I _don’t_ want _any more_ nonsense from you. Dr. Girani, _put him to sleep_.”

The hiss of a hypospray filled the air, “I’m _so_ sorry,” was the last thing Julian heard as he fell asleep.

After making sure that Julian was unconscious, Dr. Girani turned to the supplies that she had prepared since coming to the Central Bureau of Rehabilitation on Earth with Admiral Ross. Dr. Girani hadn’t known at the time that they were going to do anything more than take blood from the Augment. If she had known Admiral Ross’s true intentions, she would have said no and made him struggle on his own.

Admiral Ross, however, felt no remorse whatsoever as he gazed down at the unconscious form of Julian Bashir. Augments were dangerous, but they also had the ability to be useful if experimented on like their type of criminal deserved to be. The idea had come to him when he had been told of Julian’s presence on the Enterprise-E by Martinez following an incident in the Sickaby. Martinez had recommended the Bureau to be the best place for someone as dangerous as Bashir and Ross had agreed.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

“…Computer, locate Doctor Julian Bashir,” Martinez spoke in an anxious voice while trying to ignore the Red Alert alarms that were suddenly going off throughout the ship. “He has to still be here!”

The computer beeped, “ _Doctor Bashir is not aboard the Enterprise_ ,” it replied in an automated tone.

“Ross _lied_ to me!” Martinez breathed in an anxious voice, unaware that Dr. Crusher had come in with Dr. Grayson-Dramok and Elim, who was carrying a screaming Ricky. “He _said_ he would take me too!”

Elim froze at those words, the higher pitch allowing him to hear them even though Cardassian hearing wasn’t as adept as that of Humans, “Excuse me?” he asked coldly. “Are you referring to _Admiral Ross_?”

Martinez whirled around and quaked at Elim’s glare, “I… _yes_ ,” Martinez squeaked anxiously.

“Crusher to Bridge, Officer Martinez just _confessed_ to being involved with Doctor Bashir-Garak’s disappearance from the ship!” Dr. Crusher said as she tapped her combadge. “Security to Sickbay!”

Martinez gazed at the floor, not daring to speak or move because he didn’t want Elim finding reason to kill him where he stood. A throat suddenly cleared and Martinez looked up, deeply horrified when he saw both Picard and Data there, “Mister Martinez?” Picard asked in a cold, uncertain voice.

“Bashir’s _violent_ ,” Martinez spoke in a cold voice. “After the incident in Sickbay, Admiral Ross…”

Captain Picard’s expression darkened and Elim quietly turned away from him, not wanting to lose his temper in front of Ricky, “Data, _arrest_ Mister Martinez,” he ordered grimly. “Legate Garak…”

“ _Save it_!” Elim managed to say tersely. “I will _not_ be meeting with any Federation officials until Julian is found even if the Castellan _did_ ask me to. The Federation is _full_ of _disgusting backstabbers_!”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok quickly ushered Elim from the Sickbay to calm him just in time to see Officer Marratt come off the lift, “ _Wrong floor_ ,” Officer Marratt mused irritably before spotting the doctor. “Lady…”

“Officer Marratt, there has been an incident and I need to contact the Castellan _immediately_ ,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok replied in an anxious voice. “Can you take Legate Garak and Ricky to the Mess?”

Elim scoffed, “My Lady, I _must_ ask Captain Staveli if she has knowledge of the abduction,” Officer Marratt spoke in a cautious, concerned voice. “She _did_ participate in abducting him the first time.”

Unable to take listening to yet another pointless discussion, Elim silently wandered to the lift and took it to the floor where the O’Briens were staying. He held Ricky close as he went to the O’Brien’s quarters and pressed the door chime. Several minutes passed before a bleary-eyed Miles answered the door.

“Julian was just beamed off the ship,” Elim spoke in an anxious voice. “I need you to watch over Ricky…”

Miles’s eyes widened in shock as Elim shoved Ricky into his arms, “And what are _you_ going to do?” he asked in a confused voice, his expression concerned. “Are you planning to go looking for him?”

“Julian is _my husband_ and I have the _right_ to help search for him!” Elim snapped, his expression angry.

Miles sighed, “Garak, you _can’t_ just go running off and interrogating people like you used to in the Obsidian Order,” he replied in a concerned voice, his expression upset. “Come in and sit for a minute.”

Elim scoffed, but came inside and sat on the couch. He was beginning to feel real anxiety and a sense of helplessness because he didn’t know what to do. His usual methods of getting information obviously wouldn’t work, but he had grown so used to Julian’s presence that he suddenly found himself at a loss.

Miles walked over to him and gently set Ricky in his arms, “Eeeee?” Ricky asked through tears.

Elim sighed and gently kissed Ricky’s face, “ _Yes_ , Eeee is here,” he spoke softly. “You’re _safe_.”

Miles tapped his combadge, “Captain Picard, Garak just showed up at my quarters and said that Julian’s been abducted,” he spoke in a concerned voice. “ _What exactly_ happened? How can I help find him?”

“Stand by, Mister O’Brien, I am contacting Starfleet now,” Captain Picard’s voice filled the air.

Miles sighed and looked at Elim worriedly as the Cardassian sat there, holding Ricky close and gazing off into space helplessly. The Cardassian looked in need of comfort, but Miles didn’t know what to say.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

Nearly two hours after Dr. Girani had begun the procedure, alarms began blaring throughout the Central Bureau of Rehabilitation. The ‘procedure room’, which was cordoned off from the rest of the facility, even lit up with silent red alarms, “ _What’s happening?!”_ Admiral Ross growled. “ _Keep working_!”

As Dr. Girani continued the implantation procedure, Admiral Ross stormed over to a computer and froze when he saw an ALERT message on the screen. _President Min Zife of the United Federation Starfleet has declared a sector-wide emergency due to the abduction of Dr. Julian Bashir-Garak, husband to Legate Elim Garak of Cardassia. All emergency services will be on high alert and security will be raised…_

“Picard must have found out!” Admiral Ross growled angrily, realizing that they were running out of time to work on Julian. “Doctor Girani, is the procedure complete? We’re running short on time!”

Dr. Girani sighed anxiously, “It _shouldn’t_ be accelerated because it could mean bad things for Doctor Bashir’s long-term health,” she explained anxiously. “Obviously the Dominion didn’t do this procedure all in one day and I can’t either. If I do this wrong and don’t follow the instructions with exactness, Doctor Bashir…”

“Do you want Captain Drammell to _die?_!” Admiral Ross snapped coldly. “If Bashir _dies_ , so does he.”

Dr. Girani frowned at Admiral Ross, “We could have just taken Bashir’s blood and then experimented with it,” she replied in a confused, slightly angry voice. “ _Why_ did you want me to inseminate him? Making someone pregnant for fun...”

“Because he’s a _murderer_ and an _Augment_ and this will be the _price_ he pays for killing Luther Sloan and then trying to go on as if nothing happened,” Admiral Ross growled as a beep filled the air. “ _Ah_ …”

Dr. Girani paused just as Admiral Ross reached into his pocket and pulled out a small, clicker-like device. He clicked it and within seconds, Captain Drammell materialized holding a small bag on his shoulder and a Starfleet command uniform and Captain’s pips on his body. He was pale and his hair was a mess.

“Where am I?” Captain Drammell asked in a groggy voice, his eyes widening as he saw Julian. “What…?”

Admiral Ross gave Captain Drammell a look as he approached the younger man and he grabbed a small device off his sleeve, “I’ve had a lock on your signal since I was arrested,” he explained. “Prison transport ship was _easy_ to hijack with Doctor Girani’s help. I _know_ you want to do the right thing because you think it will help you, but Starfleet _won’t_ help you even if you follow the rules. They’ve lost too much.”

Captain Drammell was silent for several minutes as he realized that Rios and the Majid wouldn’t be looking for him because he had spent the last night on the Spacedock base. He and Rios hadn’t talked much during the journey to Earth because Drammell was ashamed of what he had done and how his condition had impaired him. Now, it seemed he would _never_ get the chance to make anything right.

“ _Perhaps_ this illness affected my judgment and it was a moment of _cognitive weakness_ to go to Colonel Kira,” Captain Drammell spoke in a shaky voice, knowing he had to play Admiral Ross’s game until he could figure out what to do. “I…I _apologize_. It seems that dealing with Quark and everyone else…”

A fatherly expression filled Admiral Ross’s face and he offered Captain Drammell a reassuring look, “Doctor Bashir’s Augmented blood will help you survive your illness, I _promise_ ,” he replied calmly. “This procedure room has a recovery area, so why don’t you rest and gather your strength for now? Once we’re done with Bashir, I’ll take you back to Deep Space Nine personally…”

Nodding, Captain Drammell silently retreated to the recovery area to rest and think on what to do.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

“Earth Security is mobilizing as we speak to search the planet for Doctor Bashir-Garak, but it will take longer for an off-planet search to begin simply because we don’t have lots of resources at our fingertips,” President Min Zife spoke in a somber voice as she sat with Picard, Riker, Dr. Crusher, Dr. Grayson-Dramok, Miles, Elim, Troi, Officer Marratt, Myrina, Data, and an anxious looking Richard and Amsha Bashir after beaming up with the Bashirs to discuss the incident. “Legate Garak, I _sincerely_ …”

Elim scoffed, “ _Spare m_ e your apologies and _Federation hypocrisy,_ ” he spat coldly, grateful that Keiko was watching Ricky so he could be a part of the meeting. “You _don’t care_ about Julian. You were ready to _crucify him_ because he’s an Augment and would have if Richard Bashir had not turned himself in!”

Richard looked extremely apologetic, “Mister Garak, I am sorry I even opened my mouth because I didn’t know all of this would happen as a result,” he stated in an apologetic voice as he gazed at Elim. “I am _delighted_ that Julian found someone so interesting to love and I want to get to know you.”

“You and Ricky should come stay with us,” Amsha offered anxiously, offering Elim a gentle smile.

Elim exhaled anxiously, unsure of what to say because he knew very little of Earth and even less of Julian’s parents except that Julian’s father had been behind his and Julian’s initial breakup. He did, however, have to think of a safe place for himself and Ricky to go and he didn’t want to go to San Francisco and be nose to nose with Starfleet if he didn’t have to be. The trust level wasn’t there.

“It might be best at this point, actually,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke in a quiet voice. “It will give everyone time to focus on the investigation without having to worry about your safety and Ricky’s.”

Elim sighed as he looked at his friend and then eyed Myrina briefly before nodding, “I’ll collect our things,” he spoke, rising from his seat because he knew they would talk more without him there.

Amsha also rose, “ _Please_ , let me help you,” she spoke kindly, offering her son-in-law a smile.

Elim nodded and waited until Amsha was with him before leaving the meeting room, “I’m going to be meeting with Admiral Grayson as soon as possible to assist in narrowing the search,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke in a somber voice. “Richard, Garak _really doesn’t need_ to be involved in this. I _know_ he _wants_ to be, but he needs to think of himself and Ricky. Can you and your wife keep them busy?”

Richard nodded, suddenly feeling very bad for his past actions, “I’ll make things right,” he promised.

“Now, let’s discuss what the Enterprise can do to assist in the search,” Captain Picard said soberly as Richard stood. “Deanna, will you go with the Bashirs and also assist Legate Garak?”

Troi nodded, but as she got up and walked over to Richard, she suddenly stopped short because she could feel mixtures of rage, anxiety, and pure agony coming from somewhere. She closed her eyes to see if she could sense where exactly it was coming from, but she couldn’t.

“Deanna?” Will and Picard spoke in unison, both of them concerned for Troi’s sudden reaction.

Troi frowned, “I sensed rage, anxiety, and pure agony, but I’m not sure where from,” she replied in a concerned voice, frowning at the group. “It _could be_ related to Doctor Bashir…”

“It would be best not to tell Elim until there’s concrete evidence as to where Doctor Bashir-Garak may be,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke quietly. “I’ll have a little talk with him about it.”

Captain Picard nodded, “I’ve never been to Earth, so I wouldn’t know where to recommend beginning your search,” Myrina apologized softly, her expression sad. “Admiral Ross only hired my crew and I to a certain extent. I have no knowledge of this, but Captain Drammell might.”

“I’ll put a call into Starfleet Security,” Captain Picard replied calmly. “Captain Drammell is supposed to be staying with them while he gives his statement. Thank you for that.”

Myrina nodded, “When am I going to be taken to Security, sirs?” she asked softly.

“We’ll discuss that with Admiral Grayson,” President Zife said softly, an idea suddenly coming to mind. “I _think_ you and Officer Marratt could be _very useful_ to helping us find Julian Bashir.”

Captain Picard looked at President Zife in surprise, “Doctor Grayson-Dramok, please make sure Legate Garak and the Bashirs depart safely,” President Zife spoke calmly, nodding at her. “Captain, we’ll re-convene in my office in four hours and discuss my idea. The fact that they’re _not_ Federation _might be useful_ when it comes to trying to get information….”

Beginning to understand, Captain Picard nodded, an intrigued expression on his face.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

The door chime rang, but Elim ignored it because he was sitting on the couch rocking Ricky into a sleep while Richard and Amsha loaded the bags on to a hover trolley that the quartermaster had provided to help them. Ricky’s eyes were closed and Elim was determined to make the frightened child feel safe.

Again, the door chime rang, “What is it?” Elim called out in a slightly cross voice. “Enterprise Security?”

The door slid open and Elim was surprised to find Jake there with a bag, “Hey, Garak, I heard about what happened to Julian,” Jake spoke in a concerned voice, frowning. “Did you want me to stay with you…?”

“Ricky and I will be staying with Julian’s parents,” Elim responded softly, wondering why on earth Jake would care about him at all. “Besides, as I recall from your Deep Space Nine file, you _do_ have a grandfather elsewhere on Earth who would _no doubt_ be _happy_ to…”

Jake nodded, “My grandpa’s off on a trip with a woman he married a few months ago and her kids, so I don’t really have anywhere to go,” he admitted softly. “I only came to be of support to Julian.”

“And to keep your mind off of Nog?” Elim asked softly, knowing that Jake and Nog had a close relationship even after Nog had joined Starfleet. “Jake, _if_ it were my house, I’d invite you…”

Jake looked to Richard and Amsha, who were both looking at Jake, “ _Of course_ your friend can stay with us!” Amsha replied in an excited voice, smiling at Elim and Jake. “We have plenty of room, Mister Garak!”

Elim nodded and Jake smiled, “I remember Jake Sisko from the station!” Richard spoke in an excited voice, smiling reassuringly at Jake. “Your father was an absolute delight!”

“Do you need help with the bags?” Jake asked quickly, not wanting to talk about his father.

Richard nodded, “I could use help hauling this trolley to the shuttlebay,” he replied calmly.

Jake smiled and promptly helped Richard haul the loaded hovertrolley from the room while Amsha stayed behind. Elim sighed and gently kissed Ricky’s forehead as the toddler slept.

“I think he’ll be all right if I keep holding him,” Elim spoke in a quiet, resigned tone.

Amsha sat next to him, “But you will get tired eventually and need rest, Mister Garak,” she spoke in a concerned voice. “Richard and I will do our best to help you both feel welcome.”

“Please call me _Elim_ , Mrs. Bashir,” Elim replied softly, his expression solemn. “We are _family_ , after all.”


	5. Beyond Normal Parameters

**Three Days Later**

**Central Bureau of Rehabilitation - Stockholm, Eurasia-NE**

_“The fetus seems to be developing faster than normal. The drugs seemed to have accelerated the pregnancy, but it’s still very much a high risk because of his body and age.”_

_“Who cares?! If he dies, then that’s one less threat to the world! Keep monitoring him!”_

Julian’s mind was hazy as he slowly came to and nausea promptly filled his body, “ _Julian_?” he heard a voice say in a soothing tone. “ _Julian, you don’t need to be afraid. You’re not alone.”_

A hand gently brushed Julian’s face and Julian frowned when he saw the long-deceased Jadzia Dax standing beside him, “Jadzia…” he spoke in a weak whisper. “You’re…dead….am I dead?”

“ _No, but you’re in trouble_ ,” Jadzia replied softly. “ _I reached out to an old friend to see what he can do_.”

Julian sighed weakly, “ _Just hang in there, Julian, and he’ll come in time_ ,” Jadzia whispered. “ _To help_.”

Exhaustion filled Julian as Dr. Girani came into view, “Doctor Bashir,” she spoke nervously.

“I feel _sick_ and _tired_ ,” Julian spoke in a weak voice. “I…what exactly did you do to me?”

Dr. Girani sighed, “The procedure and acceleration medication seems to be successful and you’re about four weeks pregnant,” she explained softly. “Admiral Ross has said you can get up to eat.”

Julian’s eyes widened in shock, “You…you made me pregnant again and _drugged_ me so the pregnancy would go faster?” he asked in a shaky voice, his body tensing as Dr. Girani sat him up. “How did…?”

“If he’s _going_ to come out and eat, you’d better get him out here!” a voice suddenly snapped.

Julian suddenly felt himself being forced into a standing position and he nearly collapsed he couldn’t entirely feel his legs, “My legs are _numb_ ,” he mumbled weakly, realizing that he was still wearing the pajamas he had worn the morning he had been kidnapped. “And I feel _even sicker_ than before.”

Dr. Girani frowned, but helped Julian walk and it was then that he realized he was in a cell-like recovery room. His frown deepened when he was led into a more open area that was made up like a hospital common area. Admiral Ross was sitting at a table along with a sick looking Captain Drammell. There were also bowls on the table: two were being eaten from and one sat in front of an empty chair.

“Have a seat and feed that _spawn_ inside you,” Admiral Ross spoke irritably. “ _Now_.”

Dr. Girani helped Julian sit in the empty chair and despite his worry that the food might make him even sicker, Julian slowly began to eat the food in the bowl. It resembled boiled oatmeal and tasted like Starfleet ration bars, but it was better than nothing. He hadn’t eaten since his abduction and so even the simplest of food was better than nothing at all. Dr. Girani lingered by the chair, watching him eat.

“Still on that religious fast?” Admiral Ross asked, eyeing Dr. Girani. “Are you sure you’re not hungry?”

Dr. Girani sighed, “I’m _fine_ ,” she replied softly, not willing to say that she was secretly fasting and holding prayers whenever she could in hopes the Emissary would return from the Celestial Temple to stop this dangerous situation from progressing any further. “Doctor Bashir, how are you feeling?”

“Fine,” Julian lied quietly between bites, knowing it would be worse for him to tell the truth.

Admiral Ross smirked as he finished his meal and got up, “If this works, we’ll be able to make others Carriers and perhaps even make it a path for Starfleet officers who don’t seem to fit in anywhere else,” he spoke in a pleased voice, grinning at Julian. “The medicine should cut gestation period in _half_ …”

“And _where_ did the medicine come from?” Julian asked in a subdued voice as he finished his meal.

Admiral Ross looked amused, “It was among the things Starfleet found when searching old Dominion internment camps after the war,” he explained in a calm voice. “Perhaps the Dominion planned to use the medication on you the first time, but you escaped before they had a chance to try. Nevertheless, I believe that the studies on your past pregnancies and the medication will be revolutionary medicine.”

“The second one _failed_ ,” Julian mused softly. “I _miscarried_ at AR-558 in case you forgot…”

Admiral Ross scoffed, “Sarina Douglas was a _manic freak_ who didn’t know what she was doing,” he spoke in a dismissive tone, eyeing Julian calmly. “I told her she wasn’t to be involved other than providing a _donation_ because you and her are both Augments. Her unique DNA was _necessary_ , as was your unique body. We’ll be monitoring every step of this experiment in hopes of a good outcome for the child you’re carrying. Since you’re a _liar and a killer_ , though, I’m not worried about your life at all.”

“Do you think his blood will be able to cure me?” Captain Drammell spoke in a tired voice

Julian frowned at Captain Drammell, “ _Cure_ you?” he asked quietly. “Are you not well?”

“No,” Captain Drammell replied softly. “I dodged the war cause of the illness, but I was caught and put in the penal colony. I met a Richard Bashir there and he helped me as much as he could with things…”

Julian tried his best to listen and think of something to say, but fatigue and abdominal pain quickly overwhelmed him to the point where he yawned and whimpered at the same time. Dr. Girani gently touched his shoulder and Julian tensed, “I think Doctor Bashir could use some rest,” she said softly.

Admiral Ross nodded, “The future lies in whether or not this experiment is successful,” he spoke firmly.

Julian said nothing as Dr. Girani helped him up and guided him back to the room, “It’s hard to _walk_ ,” he spoke in a weak voice, sighing once he felt the bed underneath him. “My ankles were just healing from being broken, but I _can’t_ even feel them now and there’s a _lot_ of pain in my back when I move.”

“I’ll make a note of it,” Dr. Girani replied softly even though, deep down, she was worried that the whole process might kill both Julian and the unborn child inside him. “I’ll wake you in about an hour for more.”

Dr. Girani quickly put Julian’s legs up just then, forcing him to lie down again. She then left the room and Julian could suddenly hear her talking to Captain Drammell, “Are you ready for the transfusion?” he heard her ask. “I was able to take blood from Doctor Bashir right before I began the procedure.”

 _I’m nothing more than a lab rat who’s going to die._ Julian thought sadly as he gave into his fatigue.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**San Francisco, California**

President Zife had gone to great lengths to get them involved in the search for Julian Bashir, but her plan hadn’t made a lot of sense. At least that’s what Myrina thought as she stood in the back room of the boarding house that Starfleet had set up after the war for those who survived long enough to make it home, but had no place to go. President Zife had installed her and Malko as proprietors of the house in hopes that perhaps someone might come in needing to stay who would have useful information. Myrina personally didn’t think anything would come of it. She was of the mind that Starfleet didn’t care about trying to find Julian Bashir and was simply making it look otherwise to try and find favor with Bajor because they were a new Federation world. If Federation worlds became unhappy with Starfleet…

“ _What_ are you doing back here?” Malko asked as he came into the back room wearing a simple pair of dress pants, boots, and a turtleneck sweater while his hair was slicked back. “We’re _supposed_ to be…”

Myrina sighed anxiously as she looked at the simple pantsuit she was wearing, “I find Starfleet’s request _concerning_ ,” she admitted softly. “They _don’t care_ about Doctor Bashir or what happened to him. They just want to make it look as if they’re doing all they can to make themselves look good to Bajor and to try and get Cardassia to join. Bajor just joined the Federation not too long ago, but they’re skeptical.”

Officer Marratt looked thoughtful, “That is the exact thought the Castellan had when I told him of Starfleet’s request,” he explained quietly. “He is _not_ happy that someone with Legate Garak’s skill was basically shoved to the sidelines when his husband is missing and most likely in trouble. Do not tell Starfleet, but the Castellan is going to be communicating with Legate Garak about any sort of future with Starfleet. The Botanical Restoration Project, plus any peace, is now in _serious_ jeopardy.”

“I _wish_ I knew how to help more, but Admiral Ross _never_ mentioned this plan,” Myrina replied softly.

Officer Marratt sighed, “That man is a _psycho_ who _needs to die_ sooner than later,” he hissed. “Anyway, I just realized we _must_ address each other using our first names if we are to masquerade as a couple. It is _not_ common practice on Cardassia for those not in a relationship to do so, but we do what we must…”

“Myrina,” Myrina replied softly, sighing. “Tell me, what sentence has the Castellan decided for me?”

Officer Marratt scoffed, “My name is Malko,” he replied softly. “The Castellan is appreciative of your services and he will negotiate on your behalf if this ruse is successful. For now, though, we should…”

A chime suddenly filled the air, “We have a patron,” Officer Marratt said. “Shall I see to them?”

The two left the storage room and Myrina was stunned to see none other than Sarina Douglas lingering in the foyer looking lost and afraid, “He…he f-f-f-orgot me,” Sarina stammered anxiously. “Admiral Ross took what he needed and then went off to be with Julian on his own! He left me behind!”

Sarina suddenly froze upon seeing Myrina and Officer Marratt, “Captain Staveli,” she breathed softly.

“Yes,” Myrina spoke in a quiet voice, frowning when Sarina clung to her and began to sob quietly.

It was several minutes before Sarina let go and looked at Myrina and Officer Marratt, “Starfleet…let you go after you helped kidnap Doctor Bashir?” Sarina asked softly. “How…and who’s the Cardassian?”

“This is a place for individuals returning home from the war that have no place to go and Malko is one of those displaced by the war,” Myrina lied softly. “After the war, I was tasked with freighting evacuees and survivors and he was one of my passengers. He was a dissident abandoned by the Dominion. We fell in love, but didn’t find each other again until recently. This is sort of a community service thing.”

Sarina nodded and Officer Marratt found himself secretly impressed at Myrina’s ability to lie, “Is there somewhere where I can rest?” Sarina asked in a quiet, pleading voice. “I’m so hurt and so broken.”

“Pick any quarters you like and make it yours,” Myrina spoke softly. “Shall I bring you some food?”

Sarina shrugged as she made her way out of the foyer to look for a room, her mind still full of grief and shock, “Let’s keep this to ourselves for now,” Myrina hissed, gazing at Officer Marratt. “I _do not trust_ Starfleet won’t hurt her for information. Perhaps our kindnesses will be more effective.”

“Whatever you say,” Officer Marratt spoke quietly, shocked at the luck they had just encountered.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Starfleet Headquarters**

“…Captain Picard, I regret that you were unable to do more, but you and the Enterprise-E are needed to help find that missing prison ship,” Admiral Grayson’s voice echoed out of an office as Miles stepped off of the turbolift at Headquarters. “Travel to Deep Space Nine and start your search from there. While you’re there, I want you to also see what information you can get about the Monroe’s disappearance…”

Miles paused and swallowed hard before moving over to the office door, “Admiral?” he asked softly.

Admiral Grayson looked up from the call she had just ended, “Yes?” she asked in a serious tone.

“I’m Miles O’Brien and I was wondering if we could talk about Julian,” Miles spoke nervously. “I…”

Admiral Grayson frowned, “Come in and sit down,” she replied in a calm voice. “Please.”

Miles obeyed and promptly sighed, “We’ve been back three days and I was wondering if there was anything I could do to help with the search for Julian,” he said nervously. “I want to help, especially since I heard you sending the Enterprise-E out on a new mission. I _couldn’t help_ but overhear…”

“Admiral Ross is a wanted man and President Zife installed me as Head of Starfleet the moment the man was arrested on Deep Space Nine,” Admiral Grayson spoke in a serious voice, her expression nothing less than professional. “The prison transport that was supposed to bring him here disappeared…”

Miles’s frown deepened, “So Admiral Ross could be involved in this?” he asked. “How can I help?”

Silence filled the office as Admiral Grayson tapped a few buttons on a computer, “Were you not told that your position at Starfleet Academy was a _community service sentence_?” she asked sternly. “You and Doctor Bashir murdered Luther Sloan on Deep Space Nine and you were offered the position at the Academy in lieu of a prison sentence, correct? That status comes with monitoring and restricted…!”

“You _can’t_ be serious!” Miles replied indignantly. “Julian’s my _friend_ and this is an _emergency!_ ”

Admiral Grayson scowled, “As far as your friend goes, Starfleet is doing what they can with the limited resources that we have!” she spoke in a sterner voice. “We’re still very much recovering from the Dominion War and we simply can’t stop that just to find someone kidnapped by a rogue Admiral!”

“That’s _not_ good enough!” Miles shouted in an upset voice. “Julian could be seriously hurt!”

Admiral Grayson exhaled anxiously as she suddenly massaged her chest, as Miles’s anger was bringing on an anxiety attack, “You…you need to _leave_ ,” she managed to say anxiously. “Before I…”

Miles stopped, “Are you all right?” he asked in a concerned voice. “Should I call Medical?”

A few minutes passed before Admiral Grayson composed herself, “ _Out_ ,” she spoke in a stern voice.

Taken aback and concerned, Miles got up and left. As he moved back towards the lift, he saw Dr. Grayson-Dramok coming off of it with her medkit in hand, “Oh, hello,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke nervously, suddenly looking worried. “I was just coming to pay a visit to my sister…”

“Oh, she’s in a right foul mood,” Miles complained. “She won’t let me help search for Julian and…”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sighed, “She’s got a lot on her plate and I’m sure your anxiety about Doctor Bashir didn’t help her,” she replied thoughtfully. “Starfleet’s a mess right now and these recent incidents haven’t helped it look credible in the eyes of other Federation members. Admiral Grayson’s also got a lot of survivor’s guilt and had this dirtside role foisted upon her cause Starfleet’s angry at her.”

Miles’s frown softened, “ _Survivor’s guilt_?” he asked quietly. “She was Captain of the Spokane, right?”

“The ship was crippled in the final battle and she was one of the very few to make it back,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok explained quietly. “It’s good that Starfleet keeps her so busy because I’m not here, but we’ve not been close for many years. You seem to be in a state just like Elim is…just as sad…just as angry.”

Miles frowned, “You’ve spoken to Garak?” he asked in a concerned voice. “How’s he doing?”

“I’m sure he could use a friendly visitor if you ever find some time to go over to New Zealand,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke in a thoughtful voice. “He’s doing his best to take care of Ricky and co-exist with Doctor Bashir’s parents and Jake, but it’s hard for him. That’s all he’s able to tell me. Now, I’ve got an appointment with the Admiral, so I’ll wish you a good day. Don’t let your anxiety overwhelm you.”

Sighing, Miles turned and left via the turbolift. He was quiet as he walked back to the apartment because he hadn’t considered how others were feeling; he had only focused on his own anger. Once inside the apartment, which was quiet because Keiko was working and the kids were at summer groups, he began to wonder if he should reach out to Garak? Maybe they could help each other grieve.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Wellington, New Zealand**

The Bashir residence, which had been considered home since 2373 when Amsha Bashir had bought the place in order to be closer to her husband during his sentence, was in a quiet area of the city. The house was a large bungalow that sat in a field near a very private strip of beach and healthy looking ocean.

Not that Elim had spent much time on the beach or appreciating the beauty of the property since he and Ricky had arrived. He had done his best to keep Ricky busy and happy, but the child could sense that his biological father was in trouble. It was also proving _exhausting_ to not break down in front of the toddler or in front of Jake and Elim honestly felt guilty about even wanting to, as he _wasn’t_ the only one hurting.

That day, overwhelmed with grief and exhausted from trying to bottle his emotions, Elim had dared to sleep in. He had asked Richard and Amsha to wake Ricky that day and tend to his needs because he was exhausted and desperately needed rest. Now, as Elim lay in bed, he found that sleep evaded him.

Instead of being closed, Elim’s eyes were focused on a picture of him and Julian on their wedding day that sat on the nightstand. In the picture, Elim and Julian were sitting together with Ricky on their laps and big smiles on their faces. It was a sad thing to focus on, but it kept him from falling to pieces.

“…Elim, there’s a call for you,” Amsha’s gentle voice suddenly filled the air. “From Miles O’Brien.”

Elim sighed, but he sat up and eyed Amsha tiredly, “ _Why_ would he call _me_?” he asked groggily.

“He wanted to see how you were,” Amsha spoke softly. “I can tell him you’re not available.”

Shaking his head, Elim got up and came out of the bedroom, sighing as he made his way over to the house’s comms terminal in the corner of the living room. He sat and silently activated the call.

“I was told you wished to speak with me,” Garak spoke numbly as Miles appeared on the screen.

Miles nodded, “I just wanted to see how you were doing?” he asked quietly. “And how Ricky is?”

“Ricky is fine,” Elim replied numbly, a scoff escaping his lips. “Is there something I can do for you?”

Before Miles could reply, Elim ended the call and suddenly found himself sobbing out loud as if his heart would break in half. He didn’t want to make a spectacle, so he quickly buried his face in his hands.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Central Bureau of Rehabilitation - Stockholm, Eurasia-NE**

“Would another dose of the medicine speed up the process even more?” Julian heard the sharp voice of Admiral Ross ask from nearby. “He’s currently at about four weeks, correct? We _need_ to speed it up.”

A sigh filled the air, “I _don’t_ think it would be safe for Doctor Bashir,” he heard Dr. Girani say softly.

“I want this experiment done by the end of the year so I can present the results to our member worlds as a way to recoup losses suffered during the war!” the waking Julian heard Admiral Ross yell. “If Captain Drammell improves as a result of the transfusion, that’s _another thing_ we can use to…”

Exhaustion filled Julian’s body and he found himself fighting the need to sleep, thereby missing pieces of the conversation. As he closed his eyes again, Julian suddenly felt a hand touch his face.

“Time to eat again,” Dr. Girani said in a kind voice. “Admiral Ross also wants me to run further tests.”

Julian exhaled weakly, “I’m _so tired_ ,” he replied in a weak voice, not opening his eyes. “I _can’t_ …”

Murmuring a quiet apology, Dr. Girani got Julian into a sitting position and he simply forced himself to endure being dragged to the table. His vision swam as he began to eat, but he kept completely quiet.

“He’ll be _fine_ ,” Admiral Ross hissed coldly, glaring at Julian as he ate. “Give him another procedure right now!”

Dr. Girani looked apologetic as far as Julian could see, but he quickly felt a hypospray being injected into his neck. There was more conversation, but Julian didn’t hear it because he promptly passed out cold.


	6. Leaps of Faith

**October**

**San Francisco, California**

“Captain Staveli, do you have a moment?” Myrina heard Officer Marratt ask quietly.

Sighing, Myrina opened her eyes and looked up to find Officer Marratt lingering at the doorway to the common area where she was offering a Bajoran prayer for guidance on Sarina. She quickly ended her prayer and rose, wondering what he wanted. He didn’t look angry, merely thoughtful and curious.

“I was just wondering what we are to do about Sarina Douglas,” Officer Marratt spoke in a quiet voice. “We’ve hid her presence from Starfleet and from everyone else. _What_ is the plan?”

Myrina sighed anxiously, “She’s _vulnerable_ ,” she replied softly. “I don’t know what to do.”

Before Officer Marratt could reply, Sarina wandered into the common area and over to a communication terminal, “I _just_ remembered that Admiral Ross gave me a way to contact him and I _want_ my Julian and my child,” she spoke in a shaky voice. “I’m _going_ to make him _listen_ for once.”

It was if Sarina didn’t know or didn’t care that she and Officer Marratt were present, Myrina realized as she watched Sarina work the comms terminal like an expert. Either way, her obsession with both Admiral Ross and Julian Bashir might prove useful because the call could lead to some real answers.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Central Bureau of Rehabilitation - Stockholm, Eurasia-NE**

_“…There is still no sign of Doctor Julian Bashir after he was abducted from the Enterprise-E in late summer and search measures are slowly being called off with no evidence that he is reachable or even still alive…”_ the voice of a newscaster filled the air of the room where Captain Drammell was resting.

The newsfeed was something Admiral Ross had given him access to while they waited to see if the blood taken from Julian Bashir would prove helpful. Even though he was feeling stronger because of the blood, Captain Drammell was anything but happy. During his transfusion and recovery, he had seen a more barbaric side of Admiral Ross that he truly hadn’t known existed and he had seen how frail of a person Julian Bashir really was despite being an alleged Augment. It made him wonder about the future.

During his time at the facility, Captain Drammell had learned that it was an inactive Starfleet outpost used to deal with war criminals in ways that Starfleet preferred kept under wraps. Except for himself and Julian, none other were patients of the facility. Doctor Girani was the only physician present and visited him twice a day, as did Admiral Ross. He had not seen Julian in nearly two weeks, however.

“…So you _found_ Captain Staveli?” Admiral Ross’s harsh voice suddenly found the air. “ _Interesting_.”

Captain Drammell quietly got up and made his way into the main area, frowning when he saw Admiral Ross end a call on the comms terminal, “Admiral?” he asked in a quiet voice. “I overheard…”

“I’m placing Doctor Bashir under your watch while I go to San Francisco to deal with Sarina Douglas,” Admiral Ross spoke in a commanding, slightly irritated voice. “She wandered into a boarding house where Captain Staveli is after spilling her guts to Starfleet. Once I deal with them, I’ll be back and we’ll work on arranging to get our data to other worlds. If Bashir gives you trouble, _kill him_ and have Doctor Girani deliver the baby. Bashir has no further use to this project once the baby is delivered anyway.”

Captain Drammell felt horrified at Admiral Ross’s request, but he nodded numbly because he didn’t know what else to do or say. Admiral Ross gave the man a reassuring smile before he walked over to the transporter that was installed, a transporter that only he had the code for. Soon enough, the Admiral was gone and Captain Drammell stared at it briefly before he went in search of Bashir and Dr. Girani.

Since the facility was small, it didn’t take long for him to find Julian in what appeared to be a cellblock designed for violent offenders. Julian was sitting on a slab in an open cell with his feet and a swollen belly in front of him that was being seemingly protected by trembling hands. His pajamas were dust-covered and tattered and there was a pair of paper slippers on what appeared to be slightly swollen feet. His hair was flat, messy, and slightly greasy while stubble covered his very pale face. His head and back were against the wall and his eyes were closed. Julian’s breaths were short and weak.

A wave of tiredness suddenly washed over Captain Drammell and he sighed; he wasn’t as strong as he thought and he needed to rest before he decided what to do. As he left to return to his bed, Julian’s eyes opened slightly and he sighed weakly, “Jadzia, is he gone?” he asked in a faint voice.

Dr. Girani, who had been making a portion of Starfleet issue rations for Julian, froze at the mention of Jadzia because she knew Jadzia Dax to be dead. She couldn’t help but wonder if Julian was losing his sanity after all that he had been through and she felt bad for him, but was also scared of Admiral Ross.

Sighing heavily, Dr. Girani made her way into the cell and set the bowl of rations on the table before gazing at Julian. She reached for Julian and he suddenly whimpered and shoved her away before vomiting all over the table and the floor to the point where he broke into a violent coughing fit. Dr. Girani quickly jumped back, barely missing being hit. Julian glared at her before closing his eyes to rest.

Taken aback by the sudden fits of violence and sickness, Dr. Girani hurried from the room to get supplies to clean up the mess and relax Julian enough that he would peacefully submit to eating. The sound of boots could suddenly be heard walking across the floor and Julian groaned, not wanting to be treated like a helpless lab rat any more than he had already been. He just wanted all of the pain to go away.

“Doctor Bashir?”

A hand suddenly touched Julian’s arm, “ _Please_ , no more,” Julian whimpered softly. “I’m broken.”

“Julian, you _need_ to open your eyes,” a familiar voice suddenly spoke. “We have to go.”

The voice was so comforting, so familiar, and so unusual that Julian forced himself to open his eyes and he was stunned to see his former Captain, Benjamin Sisko, standing beside his concrete bed. Julian’s eyes widened in shock, “You’re _dead_ , aren’t you?” he asked softly. “Just like Dax…she visited me.”

“It’s _complicated_ , but Dax did tell me what happened to you and that you need help,” Captain Sisko replied in a calm voice, giving Julian a serene look. “If you trust me, I can get you out of this.”

Julian sighed weakly, “Of _course_ I trust you,” he stated weakly. “But I don’t even know where I am.”

Captain Sisko offered his hand, “We have to _go_ ,” he spoke softly. “ _Trust me_ and take my hand.”

Without hesitation, Julian lifted his hand and gently rested it in his former Captain’s, “Just close your eyes and _breathe_ ,” Captain Sisko instructed softly. “I’ll take you somewhere where you can _rest_.”

As Captain Sisko and Julian vanished, Dr. Girani returned to the room and swore when she saw the cement cot empty. Where had Doctor Bashir gone? _Surely…surely_ he didn’t escape on his own?

Deeply confused, Dr. Girani left the cell-block and began to search the rest of the facility for Julian.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Wellington, New Zealand**

The sight of a shuttle landing just outside the Bashir property line prompted Elim to stop working on the stylus that contained botanical blueprints for Cardassia. The Castellan had asked him very nicely, but firmly to get on with working alongside Keiko O’Brien on the blueprints for the Botanical Restoration Project because Cardassia needed the hope such beauty would ultimately provide.

Elim had found himself reluctant to actually return to a sense of life since Julian was still missing, but both Richard and Amsha had encouraged him to with the promise that they would help with Ricky’s private tutoring. Jake, meanwhile, had been so busy with writing lately that he had spent a lot of time either in his room or in town. With great reluctance, Elim had agreed to get working on things.

Now, however, as he sat on the beach just down from the house, Elim found himself eyeing the shuttle suspiciously. He was shocked when the boarding ramp lowered and Miles came out with an anxious looking Dr. Grayson-Dramok at his side. Even though he was pleased to see familiar faces, Elim remained where he was because he didn’t feel like exchanging false pleasantries. He was much too tired for that.

“Garak, hello!” Miles spoke warmly as he and Dr. Grayson-Dramok came towards the Cardassian.

Elim sighed, but stood with his tablet in hand, “What brings you here in the middle of Starfleet Academy’s semester?” he asked in a quiet voice, his expression neutral. “And Lady Dramok…”

“I got clearance for a quick visit with you,” Miles admitted. “She’s my chaperone to make sure I come here, visit, and go back without any detours. Admiral Grayson _seems_ to think I might go looking…”

Elim scoffed, “At least you _want to_ ,” he spat bitterly, scowling. “Starfleet’s _giving up_ the search.”

Before Miles or Dr. Grayson-Dramok could reply, dark gray clouds suddenly filled the air and a rough wind began to blow, “Get inside!” Elim spoke in an anxious voice. “I heard these storms can be rough!”

Miles quickly ran back to the shuttle, secured it, and then hurried inside with Elim and his chaperone.

***********************

**San Francisco, California**

After arriving at the inactive Old City Station in San Francisco, which was the closest transporter destination to the address Sarina had given, Admiral Ross hadn’t taken very long to get to the actual boarding house. As he entered the foyer, he noticed Sarina sitting on the floor near a bookshelf with her hands in her lap and her gaze cast downward. She looked up at him, an anxious expression on her face.

“ _Where’s_ Julian?” Sarina asked in a childlike voice. “I want to see him and my baby…I _thought_ you…”

Admiral Ross scowled before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a phaser, “You thought I’d _reunite_ the two of you and let you _Augment freaks_ _pollute_ the Earth?!” he asked coldly, his expression dark.

Sarina quickly got to her feet, her expression anxious as Admiral Ross approached her with the phaser raised. She wasn’t sure what the setting on the phaser was, but she knew he was going to try to hurt or kill her and so she closed her eyes in fear. Suddenly, however, he heard a deep growl from nearby.

“I _don’t_ think you want to do that,” Sarina heard Officer Marratt growl as she opened her eyes and saw the Cardassian holding Admiral Ross in a headlock. “ _One_ move and I could _snap_ your neck… _Admiral_.”

Admiral Ross froze and footsteps suddenly filled the air as Admiral Grayson, Captain Picard, and Data came into view from the dining area. The Enterprise-E was officially listed as still out searching for the prison vessel, but they had secretly returned at President Zife’s request after Captain Staveli and Officer Marratt had revealed Sarina’s whereabouts. President Zife had promised to keep it quiet and had convinced Sarina to help them after showing her photos of Julian’s wedding borrowed from a Starfleet database. Sarina had concluded that Julian was happy and didn’t deserve the hate from Admiral Ross.

“I _thought_ the Enterprise was still out searching?!” Admiral Ross snapped crossly, his expression sour.

Captain Picard scowled as Colonel Kira, who had caught a ride with the Enterprise to come serve as Captain Drammell’s advocate at the hearing, suddenly came into view scowling, “ _Where_ are Captain Drammell and Doctor Bashir?” she asked in a stern voice. “They both went missing a month ago.”

“ _Good riddance_ to that _Augment freak_!” Admiral Ross snapped. “He’s as good as dead by now!”

Sarina scowled, “You mean the experiment _killed_ him?” she asked in an upset, trembling voice.

The group looked to Sarina, “ _Experiment_?” Captain Picard asked softly. “What experiment?”

“Admiral Ross recruited Doctor Girani from Deep Space Nine to take a sample from me and implant it into Doctor Bashir using the same type of method that the Dominion used,” Sarina spoke in a trembling, nervous voice, her expression worried. “Officer Martinez was _supposed_ to kidnap him, but…”

Captain Picard looked concerned and Colonel Kira looked horrified, “You kidnapped Julian to repeat what he went through at the internment camp using Dominion records?!” she snapped angrily.

“Bashir’s as good as dead after receiving multiple doses of drugs used to accelerate the pregnancy!” Admiral Ross snapped angrily, his face red with anger. “We needed a way to recoup our losses and he’s _worthless_ as far as being a Starfleet officer goes! He went to Cardassia and _married_ some Legate!”

Colonel Kira’s eyes widened in shock, “This _isn’t_ the time for this nonsense!” Admiral Grayson snapped, her expression one of pure anger. “ _Where_ are Doctor Bashir and Captain Drammell being held?!”

Suddenly, Admiral Ross’ combadge beeped, “ _Doctor Girani to Admiral Ross_ ,” a voice said. “ _Doctor Bashir’s disappeared and Captain Drammell won’t wake up. I’m very much in need of assistance_.”

“Tell us where Doctor Bashir-Garak is,” Admiral Grayson snapped coldly. “That’s an _order_.”

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Wellington, New Zealand**

It had turned unusually cold very fast and Jake Sisko took advantage of the storm outside to sit in the house’s sunroom with his notebook and pen. He had stayed with the Bashirs, Garak, and Ricky for a month now and he hadn’t felt the need to leave until now, but then the storm cropped up before he had the chance to. It wasn’t as if he felt unwelcome there, but he needed to be alone with his grief.

“ _Jake_ ,” a soft, familiar voice suddenly echoed through the room. “ _Jake, can you hear me_?”

Frowning, Jake set his book down and rose from the sunroom couch/hideabed because he recognized the voice as being his father’s, but he couldn’t see anyone. A moment passed and as Jake was about to sit back down, he spotted Dr. Grayson-Dramok coming down the hallway with a tablet in hand.

“Hey, Doctor Grayson, I was wondering if you had a minute?” Jake asked softly, wondering if he was hearing his father’s voice because he missed his father and Nog. “I _need_ someone to talk to.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok nodded and pocketed the tablet as she entered the room, “ _Jake, Julian needs your help_ ,” the voice spoke louder and clearly enough that the doctor heard it too. “ _Jake, are you there_?”

The mention of Julian caused the two to freeze in their tracks, “Dad, where are you?” Jake asked softly, his expression confused and concerned. “Why can’t I see you?”

“ _Jake, I can’t show myself because I’m taking care of Julian, but I need you to bring him help_ ,” Captain Sisko’s voice spoke in a clear voice. “ _I’ll leave you directions to find him, but you must bring him help_.”

Jake’s eyes widened as he held up his notebook and pen, “Tell me,” he replied anxiously.

Deeply stunned, all Dr. Grayson-Dramok could do was listen as the two Siskos communicated and once Jake had written everything down, he bolted from the room. The doctor silently followed after Jake and quickly happened upon him talking with Miles and Elim anxiously.

“…You’re telling me that your _father’s voice spoke_ to you and told you where to find Julian?” Miles asked in a concerned, skeptical voice, frowning at Jake. “He gave you a _location_?”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok watched as Jake showed the address to Miles and Elim, “…Elim, Ricky’s fussing,” Richard’s voice filled the air. “Are you and that friend of Julian’s still in the den?”

“ _Yes_ , we’re still here,” Elim responded in a nervous voice, his eyes on Jake because he was anxious to go and see if Julian was actually within reach. “I’ll give him a cuddle.”

A nervous silence filled the room at that moment and Elim let out a weak sigh when Richard brought Ricky, who was fussing, into the den. Miles cringed, suddenly remembering something.

“We _can’t_ take the shuttle to this location even if we know where it is because Starfleet’s tracking my signal to make sure I don’t go off on my own,” Miles spoke in a concerned voice.

Richard passed Ricky to Elim and peered at the notebook Jake was holding, “ _That’s_ the address of where we lived before we took Julian to Adigeon Prime,” he spoke in a confused voice, frowning at Jake quizzically. “That’s _not_ in public records, so how did you end up with it?”

Jake paled, “My father told me,” he replied softly. “He said Julian is there and _need_ s help.”

Richard frowned as Elim cuddled rested Ricky against his shoulder, but he eventually nodded and sighed, “If Starfleet’s tracking your movements, you best use the transporter to get there,” he volunteered in a concerned voice, wondering if there was truth to what Jake was saying. “It’s something I built in case we ever needed to get out of here in a hurry. How badly off is Julian?”

“My dad didn’t go into details,” Jake replied in a concerned voice, frowning because he wondered why his father would appear to _Julian_ and not to any of his family members.

Dr. Grayson-Dramok looked at Miles, “Take off your combadge,” she replied in a firm voice, giving him a look. “That’s how Starfleet is tracking your signal. If you leave the combadge behind, they’ll think you’re here. I know you and Elim want to go after Julian…”

Elim looked amused as he passed the now sleeping Ricky back to Richard, “How very _Cardassian_ of you to help Chief O’Brien disobey Starfleet orders,” he replied in an amused tone. “We’ll need you, of course, because Julian will _more than likely_ need medical attention and Chief…”

“I’d like to come as well,” Jake spoke in a quiet voice, sighing. “I…I want to see my dad again.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok quickly left the room to get supplies, as did Miles. Elim, however, remained behind and gave Jake a look of understanding before nodding at him silently.


	7. The Emissary's Promise

**London, England**

“Doctor Bashir?” Julian heard a soft voice speak as a hand touched his face. “You’re so _cold_!”

Julian’s eyes fluttered open and he was surprised to see Captain Sisko’s face staring back at him, “ _Captain_ ,” he spoke in a weak voice, his expression tired as he spoke. “You’re _alive_ …”

“You were _in need_ of _help_ ,” Captain Sisko replied softly, his expression concerned. “You’re…”

Julian sighed weakly, “Broken and pregnant again,” he replied in a resigned voice. “It’s just as _painful_ as the last one, but I _can’t_ feel my legs this time. They gave me too many drugs…”

Captain Sisko nodded, “When Dax finally caught up with me, she explained everything,” he said in a gentle soothing voice. “Do you think you might be able to eat or drink anything?”

“I was given a bowl of gruel six times a day and right before you came, I threw it up because I was _sick_ of it,” Julian responded in a weak voice. “I was in a _cell_ for a long time too…”

Captain Sisko sighed and Julian suddenly felt something soft underneath his upper back, “Where are we?” Julian asked in a weak voice, tiredness filling him. “Did…did I _die_?”

“You’re _not_ dead, Doctor,” Captain Sisko replied softly. “Neither is your little one.”

A weak groan escaped Julian’s lips and he suddenly felt warmth pulse through his body, “I’m so _sleepy_ ,” he spoke in a weak, faint voice. “Even if I don’t make it, I hope this little one does.”

Captain Sisko sighed and gently ran his fingers across Julian’s forehead, causing the battered doctor to suddenly relax, “The Prophets knew we had conflict stemming back to when Dax died, so they released me so I could to come to your aid,” he explained softly. “My time with them has taught me a great deal including that I said hurtful things to you… _very hurtful_ things.”

“Ricky actually spent some time as a foster child of Miles and Keiko because Starfleet made me give him up,” Julian spoke in a faint voice, his expression tired. “I went to Cardassia after making an _alcoholic_ of myself on Deep Space Nine. Colonel Kira _wasn’t_ supposed to let me…”

Captain Sisko looked concerned, “The entire experience in the internment camp scarred you deeply and I’m _sorry_ I didn’t take more notice,” he replied softly. “I _did_ recommend that you terminate the pregnancy, but I did it because I _thought_ it would make your pain go away. I acted like that when I first came to Deep Space Nine. I tried to _run_ from my problems, but you…”

“That’s the past,” Julian spoke weakly, his body slowly giving out. “That’s all in the past.”

Captain Sisko sighed, “The Prophets told me to seek your forgiveness so we can both have peace from it,” he explained in a soft voice. “It’s your choice, though, whether or not…”

“I forgive you,” Julian interrupted softly, his expression tired. “When people are under stress, they often say things they don’t mean and we had just lost Dax. I know you didn’t mean it.”

Captain Sisko nodded, his expression thoughtful, “That blessing I gave you back on the starbase was a _lifelong_ blessing, you know,” he continued softly. “It will protect you and your family for the rest of the time you are all alive. That blessing binds us all together and it’s because of that blessing that I was able to come to you today. Now, I’m going to follow through with my help.”

“ _Where_ are we?” Julian asked softly, frowning as Captain Sisko suddenly got up. “Sir?”

Captain Sisko, however, didn’t reply as he made his way over to a transporter that was in the shadows of the room next to a doorway. He had felt Jake was bringing help and that they were going to transport in and sure enough, the transporter had been activated and was indicating that multiple people were waiting to transport in. Sighing, he activated the transporter.

Within seconds, Miles, Jake, Elim, and Dr. Grayson-Dramok materialized and Jake, Miles, and Elim immediately froze at the sight of Captain Sisko standing there in his old uniform. Jake immediately rushed forward and embraced his father, smiling while tears filled his eyes.

“It’s good to see you too, Jake,” Captain Sisko spoke in a quiet voice. “You _listened_ …”

Jake nodded, smiling at his father, “I _did_ , but where’s Julian?” he asked in a worried voice.

“Who’s there?” a faint voice suddenly spoke through the dimly lit room. “Jake?”

Elim froze and he made his way towards the voice while Miles went in search of lights, “ _Julian_?” he spoke in a confused, shaken voice as if he could hardly believe what he was hearing. “Is…?”

Light suddenly flooded the room and Elim swore loudly as he looked upon the battered, visibly pregnant mess that was his husband. Julian was laying on a carpet and quickly looked at him.

“Hi,” Julian spoke in a quiet voice as he closed his eyes. “I _can’t_ keep my eyes open.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok’s eyes widened in horror at seeing Julian and she immediately broke open the medical kit she had brought along before moving to his side. She knelt down next to him.

“Chief O’Brien, find a communications terminal and get in touch with Discovery Memorial Hospital,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok ordered in an anxious voice. “It’s a Starfleet hospital that I know is in the area and it’s the best chance Doctor Bashir-Garak and his baby have right now…”

Miles obeyed and Julian groaned weakly, “ _Dax_ …” he mumbled, not waking. “ _Save us_ …”

“It’s _going_ to be _okay_ , Julian,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok said softly. “For _both_ of you.”

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

Discovery Hospital had been founded years ago by Starfleet in memory of the lost U.S.S. Discovery at the insistence of Ash Tyler and Spock. It was in a quiet area of London and as Dr. Grayson-Dramok exited the room where Julian was now being seen to by basic medics on staff and an EMH, she found herself grateful that she had spent time working there years ago at the insistence of her sister. The hospital was well equipped to help make Julian healthy again.

To her surprise, Elim was sitting alone in a chair as close to the door as he could get and he gazed up at her with a helpless expression on his face, “Young Mister Sisko and Captain Sisko went off to the cafeteria to speak and Chief O’Brien is contacting Julian’s parents,” he explained in a quiet, distressed voice. “I thought you were overseeing Julian’s care? What are you…?”

“Elim, I’ve got an emergency on my hands,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok replied patiently. “I came out here to tell you that the baby needs to be delivered and put in a portable neonatal chamber _immediately_ if there is to be _any_ chance of saving it and Julian. You’re Julian’s next of kin…”

Elim’s face fell, “Isn’t it _too soon_?” he asked in a distressed voice. “The _baby_ …I _can’t_ ….oh _God_.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok looked thoughtful, “Initial scans showed that he was given some sort of drugs to accelerate his pregnancy, so he’s much further along than you think,” she explained in a quiet voice. “Elim, I _need_ to take the baby so I can give Julian life-saving treatments.”

Elim nodded, “And Elim, Julian’s going to have to be as he is for the delivery,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok added softly. “You need to come and hold his hand so I can focus on the surgery.”

Swallowing hard, Elim rose and followed his friend into the room. Julian was laying on a biobed underneath a sheet surrounded by a few nurses. His clothes and paper slippers were in a pile on the floor and he looked scared. A breathing device was over his mouth and nose.

“Prep Doctor Bashir-Garak for an emergency C-section and get a portable neonatal chamber ready _immediately_ ,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke in a commanding voice. “Elim, go to Julian.”

Elim quickly moved to Julian’s side and gazed down at him just in time to see him close his eyes, “Oh, my _dear_ doctor,” he spoke in a quiet voice, stroking Julian’s messy hair. “My love.”

Julian’s eyes fluttered open again and he stared up at Elim, a confused expression on his pale face as the noise of surgical preparations filled the air, “Doctor Grayson-Dramok has to deliver the baby, my love,” Elim explained, catching on that Julian had heard the noise and was rightfully confused. “I’m here to hold your hand and calm you.”

Elim watched as Julian suddenly lifted his hand, a hand was dirty, worn, and bruised, “ _Rest_ ,” he instructed softly, taking Julian’s cold hand in his warm one. “You _don’t need_ to watch this.”

Julian obeyed and Elim alone watched his friend and the medics quickly cut Julian open with gentle, but quick precision. In less than a minute, Dr. Grayson-Dramok had the baby out and had turned it over to the medics. Elim watched as they hurried the baby over to a neonatal chamber in the corner. Whoever had put it there had obviously been quick, he reasoned.

“Elim, I _need_ to talk to you,” Elim suddenly heard his friend say anxiously. “ _Right now_.”

Elim turned away from the baby and frowned when he saw Dr. Grayson-Dramok looking down at Julian’s cut open torso with disdain, “His reproductive parts have been severely damaged by what he’s been through and I _need_ to remove them or else he’ll bleed to death. I also don’t think he’ll be able to have new reproductive parts implanted. His body can’t handle it.”

A pained expression filled Elim’s face, as he knew that such a surgery would mean no more children unless they adopted them. It was, however, truly better to have Julian and the two children that existed rather than bemoaning the fact that they wouldn’t have more.

“Do _whatever you must_ to save Julian,” Elim spoke in a quiet voice. “Whatever you must.”

Without waiting for a response, Elim left the room and sighed when he saw Miles lingering in the corridor looking concerned, “I contacted Julian’s parents and told them what was going on,” Miles explained in a concerned voice. “What are you doing out here, anyway?”

“The baby had to be delivered and now Julian is having his reproductive parts _removed_ ,” Elim explained in a grim voice, his expression resigned. “I _don’t_ know if _either_ of them will…”

Miles flinched, “I’m _sorry_ ,” he replied in a solemn voice. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“What did Julian’s parents say when you told them about Julian?” Elim asked quietly, not wanting to get into a discussion about his feelings and his needs at the moment.

Miles sighed, “They want answers as to where he was and they also said Starfleet contacted them saying that Admiral Ross was arrested in San Francisco,” he explained. “Starfleet also knows I left New Zealand and they’re _not_ happy, but they haven’t done anything about it… _yet_. I _forgot_ that I was supposed to check in every so often because I was anxious to find Julian.”

Elim nodded as Captain Sisko and Jake suddenly came down the corridor towards them, “Ah, Captain, thank you very much for rescuing Julian,” Elim spoke briskly. “I only hope it’s not…”

“They’ll _both_ be fine,” Captain Sisko replied in a calm voice. “You just need to _trust_.”

Jake, meanwhile, was eerily quiet and looked unusually determined, “Garak, do you think I could do a story on Julian’s rescue and about the baby?” he asked softly. “It might help his case with Starfleet and make everyone take the situation more seriously. I won’t if you say no.”

Before Elim could reply, a couple of medics came out with the baby cleaned and swaddled in the neonatal chamber, “Where are you taking him?” he asked in an anxious voice, frowning.

“Doctor Grayson-Dramok asked us to set up a room for your husband in the section of the hospital where families can stay with recovering patients,” one of the medics explained as he produced a PADD from his pocket and offered it to Garak. “Your new son also needs a name.”

Elim looked surprised, “You mean the baby will _make it_?” he asked, taking the PADD.

The medic nodded, his expression confused, “You and your family are _quite welcome_ to stay together during your husband and son’s recovery,” he explained. “The doctor’s given her permission for it.”

Captain Sisko smiled at the baby, as did Jake and Miles, but Elim took a moment to breathe before he himself gazed at the child. The baby looked like a miniature version of Julian and he was very quiet, but breathing. His little body had been cleaned and was wrapped in a light blue blanket.

Sighing, Elim looked at the PADD and saw that it was a birth certificate with himself and Julian listed as the parents, a certificate that had been signed by Dr. Grayson-Dramok. Never mind that he wasn’t the biological parent, Elim mused silently; he _was_ Julian’s husband and would be the new baby’s father.

 _What to call him_? Elim wondered, well aware he was expected to give an answer. _What would Julian…?_

“Dax Benjamin,” Elim spoke softly, realizing that Julian _had_ mentioned the name Dax and if it weren’t for Benjamin Sisko, neither Julian nor the baby would be alive now. “Dax Benjamin Bashir-Garak.”


	8. First Aftershocks

**Three Days Later**

**Central Bureau of Rehabilitation - Stockholm, Eurasia-NE**

After stalling, mocking Julian’s life and interspecies marriage, and also berating Starfleet’s weakness, Admiral Ross had finally told Starfleet where Julian had been held prisoner and experimented on, but there was amusement in his voice when he said it. He had gone as far to say that the freak Augment’s corpse would most likely be rotting by now. Sarina, meanwhile, was continuing to stay with Myrina and Malko while she waited to testify against the Admiral.

Since the Enterprise was still in dock, President Zife had requested their help in searching the bureau for evidence that Doctor Bashir had been there and to see if anyone else still was. Captain Picard had sent Commander Riker, Dr. Crusher, Geordi, and Data along with Admiral Grayson to the facility to see what and who they would find there. He, meanwhile, planned to visit Discovery Memorial with Commander Troi to see if they could help Julian and his family.

Now, as Commander Riker, Admiral Grayson, Geordi, and Data entered the facility, they immediately heard quiet talking, “…You’re getting stronger,” a voice spoke quietly.

“This is Commander William Riker of the Enterprise,” Riker called out. “Identify yourselves.”

Silence filled the air, followed by quiet footsteps, and the four were stunned silence when a tired looking Captain Drammell came into the main area being heavily supported by an anxious looking Dr. Girani. Admiral Grayson frowned, Geordi swore, Riker gasped, and Data frowned.

“Doctor Bashir’s _gone_ ,” Dr. Girani spoke shakily. “If that’s who you’re looking for.”

Commander Riker frowned, “We were also looking for _you_ ,” he replied in a firm voice.

“Admiral Ross beamed me from the Spacedock station and Doctor Girani took some of Doctor Bashir’s blood to try and cure a condition I’ve battled in secret since the Academy,” Captain Drammell explained in a weak voice, his expression forlorn. “But for Doctor Bashir to _die_ …”

Dr. Crusher frowned, “Do you mind if I examine you myself?” she asked softly, trying not to think about the great suffering Doctor Bashir had ended while at this facility.

Captain Drammell shook his head, “Where was Doctor Bashir held?” Commander Riker asked.

Dr. Girani looked uneasy, “At first, in the extended treatment room and Admiral Ross had me move Doctor Bashir to the violent offenders cellblock,” she explained. “I don’t know _how_ Bashir managed to get out, but he managed it. It was if someone came and _beamed_ him out….”

Captain Drammell’s eyes widened, “You told me he _died_ ,” he spoke in an anxious voice.

“That’s what Admiral Ross _intended_ to happen,” Dr. Girani replied grimly.

Dr. Crusher took Captain Drammell’s arm and led him away while Dr. Girani led Data, Geordi, and Riker into the extended treatment area. The room smelled of blood and vomit and there was strange technology everywhere along with a table that had PADDs scattered across it.

“Doctor Bashir would sit here while I would use the equipment to run tests and take notes,” Dr. Girani explained in a quiet voice. “Admiral Ross would also use Romulan mind probes…”

Commander Riker frowned, “ _Why_?” he asked in a cold voice. “What possible reason…?”

“Admiral Ross was _angry_ that Doctor Bashir went to Cardassia and seemed to think that his marriage to Garak was nothing more than a ruse by which he could share Federation secrets with the Cardassians,” Dr. Girani explained. “Bashir kept resisting, so _stricter measures_ …”

Data frowned, “And the pregnancy experiment?” he asked. “What was its purpose?”

“Bashir was originally made a Carrier and impregnated by the Dominion and Admiral Ross decided to try and re-create what happened to see if others could be made Carriers,” Dr. Girani explained in an anxious voice. “Admiral Ross used Sarina Douglas as a donor and Officer Martinez of the Enterprise was _supposed_ to bring Doctor Bashir here, but that part of the plan was obviously changed. Admiral Ross was going to offer to help with repopulation efforts…”

Geordi felt utterly disgusted at the fact that a Starfleet Admiral used a fellow Starfleet officer as a lab rat to test the viability of Dominion technology, but he didn’t offer a comment, “Data, Geordi, collect everything here,” Commander Riker ordered firmly. “Doctor Girani…”

“Don’t tell me; I’m _under arrest_ ,” Dr. Girani replied, her tone one of resignation.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Discovery Memorial Hospital – London, England**

_Warmth…why do I feel warm? I feel unusually warm…_

_Voices…nearby? Am I going to be woken again for more of that disgusting gruel?_

A wooshing sound filled Julian’s ears as he breathed and he opened his eyes, frowning when he realized that he no longer felt pregnant or even heavy. _Had the baby been taken from him?_

Soft beeps filled the air and he turned his head, his eyes widening when he saw Elim sitting next to some sort of machine that was not far away. From what he could hear, Elim was reading some sort of Cardassian novel and looked unusually tired. _Who_ was Elim reading to?

Julian tried to speak, but he found that something was blocking his ability. He weakly looked around and ended up rapping softly on the side of the bed, hoping to get Elim’s attention.

“Doctor?”

Julian turned towards the voice and saw that it was Dr. Grayson-Dramok, “Julian?” Elim spoke in an anxious voice, suddenly ending his reading and gasping when he saw Julian awake.

Quiet talking filled the air and all of a sudden, Julian heard himself groan softly and he was immediately embraced, “Oh, _my dear doctor_ ,” Elim spoke in a tired voice. “ _My_ Julian…”

Tears filled Julian’s eyes and he found himself crying weakly in Elim’s arms, “It’s _all right_ ,” Elim’s voice spoke in his ear as he felt himself being caressed gently. “You’re _safe_ now.”

Once the embrace was over, Julian frowned, “Elim, I lost _another_ child,” he managed to speak in a faint, unsteady voice with a pained expression on his face. “They made me _pregnant_ …”

Elim gave Julian a look, “ _No_ , my dear, you _had another baby_ ,” he replied calmly. “Dax Benjamin Bashir-Garak is _premature_ , but he is very much _alive_ and he’s in a neonatal chamber.”

Julian’s eyes widened, “Dax Benjamin?” he asked softly, his expression one of pure confusion.

Elim nodded as Dr. Grayson-Dramok suddenly left the room, “Can I see him?” Julian asked softly, his expression tired as he struggled to compose himself. “Did you check on Ricky?”

“Ricky’s with your parents and they wanted to wait til you could have visitors before they came for a visit,” Elim explained quietly. “Dax is napping and you _should_ be napping right now too.”

Shouting suddenly filled the corridor, “…I _don’t_ care _what_ Starfleet told you, Captain!” Dr. Grayson-Dramok’s voice spoke in an angry tone. “Doctor Bashir-Garak just woke up and is in _no condition_ for a debriefing right now! He’s been through pure agony and needs to rest…!”

Julian looked surprised, “They _didn’t_ waste _any_ time,” he spoke in a faint voice.

Elim scowled, “You’re _not_ ready,” he replied firmly. “You’ve had serious surgeries, you’re on antibiotics, and you’re recovering from trauma. Starfleet can just _wait_ until you _are_ ready.”

“ _Surgeries_?” Julian asked in a faint voice, his expression tired. “What kind of surgeries?”

Elim sighed, “A _complete_ hysterectomy and a splenectomy,” he replied softly. “I’m _sorry_.”

“ _Okay_ ,” Julian replied softly, a sigh in his voice. “If it was _necessary_ …please hold me.”

Nodding, Elim climbed into the bed and Julian clung to him as he silently wept himself back into a deep sleep. Elim silently kissed the top of Julian’s head and held him as he slept.

A few moments passed in silence before Dr. Grayson-Dramok came into the room looking highly annoyed, “Captain Picard will _not_ leave until he and Commander Troi get to speak with Julian,” she explained, pausing when she saw Elim holding him. “Did something happen?”

“I told him about Dax and the surgeries,” Elim replied softly. “It was _a lot_ for him to take in.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok nodded, “I also talked to Admiral Grayson and she wants Julian moved to a more private facility,” she spoke quietly. “Jake Sisko of the Federation News Network wrote some things that are making people throughout the system uneasy about trusting Starfleet.”

Elim scoffed, “Maybe in a few days, Julian will be strong enough to do that, but he’s _not_ right now,” he replied indignantly. “I know Chief O’Brien went back to San Francisco the other…”

“Admiral Grayson did mention that and she said Captain Sisko is going to advocate for him,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok replied quietly. “Technically, Chief O’Brien _did_ violate his probationary agreement and so there _could_ be trouble for him even though he did it to help Julian out.”

Elim sighed irritably, “I _hope_ you let the Castellan know,” he replied calmly. “By helping rescue Julian, Chief O’Brien performed a service to Cardassia and we _could use_ good engineers if Starfleet sees fit to impose a punishment. It’s far from Earth, but Cardassia is better than…”

“I’ll pass it along,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok replied softly. “Elim, Picard _isn't_ going to go away.”

Elim sighed and gently nudged Julian, “My dear, you have to wake up again,” he spoke in a soothing voice. “Captain Picard and Commander Troi are here and want to talk to you.”

Julian sighed weakly, but woke up, “I'm a Lieutenant until I get court-martialled, so I have to listen to orders,” he spoke in a weak voice, his expression sad. “You can let them in.”

Elim scowled, but Dr. Grayson-Dramok left the room to retrieve Picard and Troi and returned only a few moments later with them in tow. Captain Picard studied Julian intently and Commander Troi offered a smile, “Hello there, sir and ma'am,” Julian spoke meekly.

Captain Picard and Commander Troi got some visitors chairs and brought them over to the bed, before sitting in them, “How are you feeling?” Commander Troi asked softly, her tone gentle.

“I _don't_ know yet,” Julian replied in a subdued voice. “I just barely woke up and have been told that we have a new son and that I've had _two_ major surgeries. I'm so tired that I can't think.”

Commander Troi nodded, “If it weren't for Captain Sisko suddenly appearing and taking me away from that place, I'd be dead now,” Julian continued softly. “Admiral Ross constantly said that it would be _better_ if I did because I'm _illegal_ and I _wasn't_ important to the experiment...”

“I can assure you that Admiral Ross will be dealt with as severely as the law will permit,” Captain Picard replied, hoping that would indeed be the case. “His allegations to Starfleet are that he selected you for the experiment because you went to Cardassia contrary to orders...”

Julian scoffed, “I was becoming an _alcoholic_ on Deep Space Nine and Nerys made me take a shipment of medical supplies to Cardassia, but I got beat up when delivering them,” he spoke in a tired, but firm voice as he scowled. “Elim took care of me and we fell in love...again.”

Captain Picard looked taken aback, “You and Legate Garak were previously in a relationship?” he asked in a confused voice, frowning. “I don't believe Starfleet at large was aware of that...”

“Because we didn't tell anyone and we never formalized anything then,” Julian replied softly. “We ended things because of circumstances beyond our control and between losing Elim and then losing Ricky to foster care after the war, I was broken. I was broken long before this incident and I'm _very fortunate_ that Elim loves me even with all of my flaws and brokenness.”

Elim scoffed, “I _never_ stopped,” he spoke indignantly. “I loved you the _moment_ we met.”

Julian looked taken aback and sighed, “I _need_ to get up and see Dax,” he spoke softly. “ _Please_.”

“For a moment and then back to bed,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke firmly. “All right?”

Elim crawled off of the bed and carefully helped Julian up, securing one of his hands around the dripline pole before taking hold of his other one. It was then that Julian saw he was in a simple blue hospital gown and bare feet. The cold floor was making his feet ache, but he ignored it.

It took all of Julian's energy to move over to the neonatal chamber, but he managed it and didn't ask anyone to join him and Elim because he just wanted that moment for them. Dax was asleep inside the chamber, but Julian didn't mind and touched the chamber with a quiet sigh.

“Hello there, Dax,” Julian spoke in a quiet tone, his expression tired. “I'm your daddy.”

Dax continued to sleep and Julian sighed, “Sarina Douglas was apparently the donor, but _I_ am listed on the birth certificate as the other parent,” Elim spoke quietly. “Dax is yours and mine.”

Julian nodded and cringed as the pain in his feet increased, “I need to sit,” he spoke. “My _feet_.”

Elim nodded and helped Julian back to bed, “I might have _arthritis_ ,” Julian spoke weakly before sighing and looking at Picard, Troi, and Dr. Grayson-Dramok. “I know I'm set to lose my commission for going to Cardassia, but I'm _not_ able to deal with a court-martial right now,”

“ _Nobody_ is asking you to,” Captain Picard replied patiently. “Starfleet does, however, need you to testify against Admiral Ross about the two kidnappings. Your testimony is _essential_...”

Julian sighed weakly, “All right, I think that's enough for now,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok cut in in an anxious voice, seeing that Julian was quickly tiring. “Captain, Commander...”

“I'd like to come back in a few days and visit with you more, if that's all right?” Captain Picard asked in a kind voice as he stood and moved his chair. “I can be your friend in all of this.”

Julian, however, remained silent as Dr. Grayson-Dramok showed Picard and Troi out because he was simply over kissing up to Starfleet. Elim got back on the bed with him and studied him.

“I'm _tired_ ,” Julian finally spoke in a pained voice, his eyes filling with tears. “I'm _so, so tired_.”

Elim silently opened his arms and Julian melted against him, relaxing in the warmth that Elim's Cardassian body provided, “Maybe in a few days, your parents can come and bring Ricky and Kukulaka and it will help you feel better,” Elim spoke. “What do you think about that idea?”

A weak snore filled the air and Elim sighed when he saw that Julian had fallen asleep, “Oh, my _dear_ doctor,” he murmured softly, his expression tender. “I _promise_ I'll help you through this.”

For a few moments, the room was silent and Elim closed his eyes briefly in an effort to decompress from recent events. He would need to be strong for their entire family for a while and he could manage it as long as he got a few powernaps now and then. Now seemed to be the perfect time for one.

“...Doctor, you need to take a look at the newsfeed,” an anxious voice suddenly filled the air. “ _Now_.”

Anxious footsteps and whispering filled the air and Elim forced himself awake just in time to see Dr. Grayson-Dramok talking with a medic just outside of the open door, “...Jake Sisko of the Federation News Service just broke the story and got _footage_ of it happening,” the medic's voice said worriedly.

More whispers filled the air and a few moments passed before Dr. Grayson-Dramok nodded at the medic before entering the room. She silently walked over to the neonatal chamber and stared at the readings silently for a few moments before walking over to the biobed and studying the readings.

“Mary, _what_ is all the panic?” Elim asked in a concerned, but hushed voice. “So much _secrecy_...”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sighed, “Jake Sisko just released a breaking news story from San Francisco,” she explained in a somber voice, her expression serious. “Admiral Grayson had a meeting with Captain Sisko and Chief O'Brien and after that meeting, she had Chief O'Brien _arrested_ for breaching his order of probation.”

Elim's eyes widened in shock and Julian promptly woke, having overheard the news. He stared at the doctor in shock for a few moments without saying anything before he began to silently weep. All Elim could do was let him cry and hold him, which is what he did because doing anything else would be utterly pointless.


	9. Smashed to Pieces

**12 Hours Later**

**Discovery Memorial Hospital – London, England**

“Julian?”

Julian didn’t respond and Elim remained in the open doorway to Julian’s hospital room, stunned that he had left the room to stretch his legs while Julian slept and had come back to _this_. Julian was standing beside the bed on shaking legs and looking as if he were lost and confused.

Elim silently entered the room, “I…I woke up expecting to be observed and fed disgusting gruel, but nobody was there,” Julian spoke in a trembling, weak voice. “I was woken at all hours of the day and eventually, I just learned to be ready. I keep expecting them to do the same here.”

“This is a _hospital_ , my dear,” Elim spoke in a quiet, concerned voice. “To help you get well.”

Julian swallowed hard and his expression was stony, “They’d make me take walks whether or not I wanted to,” he replied, as if he hadn’t heard what Elim said. “How do I know that…?”

“Julian, it’s _evening_ ,” Elim spoke in a concerned voice. “Most the staff have gone home.”

Julian, however, didn’t move and Elim silently wandered over to him, sighing as he placed his hands on Julian’s shoulders, “You were _conditioned_ to do whatever they made you do, but you’re _not_ there anymore,” Elim spoke gently. “You’re _safe_ , my dear. Are you hungry?”

Shaking his head, Julian took a step back and silently wrapped his arms around himself while closing his eyes, “I…I _don’t know_ if this place is _safe_ ,” he managed to stammer. “I _don’t_!”

Elim stepped forward and gently embraced Julian, “This place is safe because I am with you and I _will_ protect you,” he replied in a gentle, but firm voice. “You will _always_ be safe with me.”

“They’re _studying_ me and they want to _hurt_ Dax because he’s my child and I’m an _illegal freak_ who should be killed,” Julian replied anxiously. “I’m _scared_ to let any of _them_ come near me.”

Elim looked concerned, as Julian was obviously suffering from PTSD or psychological trauma from the mind probes, “Julian, let’s sit a moment,” he spoke in a calm voice. “On the bed.”

Julian looked as if he wanted to protest, but Elim gently took hold of him and sat him down on the bed, “Have you eaten or drank _anything_ since you woke up?” Elim asked softly.

“I…I haven’t _wanted_ anything,” Julian stammered softly, his expression anxious.

Elim sighed, “You _need_ food and drink to get better,” he replied gently. “You _need_ it.”

“I keep seeing that _disgusting_ gruel,” Julian spoke quietly. “It was _watery_ and _bland_.”

Elim nodded, “I’m sure we can find you something better here,” he replied quietly.

“But will they _let_ me eat it?” Julian asked softly, yawning. “Ugh, I’m so tired.”

Elim gave Julian a look, “Why don’t you get back in bed then and I’ll personally bring you something to eat that doesn’t resemble the gruel?” he suggested gently. “Or if you don’t think you can sleep in the bed, why don’t I get you a chair and you can spend some time with Dax?”

“I’m scared of _hurting_ him more,” Julian spoke quietly. “The time in that place…hurt him.”

Elim scoffed, “You _haven’t_ hurt him,” he replied firmly. “Let’s go look at him together.”

Julian looked reluctant, but allowed Elim to help him over to the neonatal chamber where Dax was awake. Footsteps suddenly filled the air and Dr. Grayson-Dramok came into the room with a container full of food for Ricky, Elim, and Dax that she had carefully replicated. She froze at the sight of Julian and Elim standing at the neonatal chamber looking somewhat worried.

“I brought you all some dinner,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke up. “Is anyone hungry?”

Elim turned to face his friend, but Julian continued watching Dax as if he hadn’t heard anyone speak, “Mary, might I speak to you alone in the hallway?” he asked softly. “Perhaps Julian can feed Dax while we talk. He’s been wanting to spend more time with Dax anyway.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok set the container on the table and opened it before bringing Dax’s liquid nutrition over to Julian, “Would you like to feed your son?” she asked in a kind voice.

Julian suddenly looked afraid, “I _don’t know_ how,” he replied softly. “I _don’t_ want to _hurt_ him.”

“How about you watch me and you can try next time?” Dr. Grayson-Dramok asked gently, suddenly concerned about Julian’s vacant, withdrawn expression. “It’s easy enough.”

Julian nodded and kept quiet as Dr. Grayson-Dramok fed Dax and made sure he was clean, healthy, and comfortable, “How are you feeling?” she asked in a kind voice, looking at him.

“I _don’t know_ ,” Julian admitted softly. “My mind _isn’t_ right and I’m feeling _shaky_.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok nodded, “Why don’t you get back in bed and I’ll run a scan and see what’s going on, okay?” she suggested in a kind voice. “You’re still very much in recovery mode.”

Julian silently returned to the bed and laid down and Dr. Grayson-Dramok quietly ran a scan while Elim wandered over to the food, “I think eating might help for the moment,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok finally spoke in a kind voice. “I brought you some applesauce, toast, and a smoothie.”

“I’ll just have the toast,” Julian replied numbly, sighing. “The rest might be too much.”

Elim dutifully brought the container of toast over to the bed and placed it in Julian’s hands, “Mary and I are going to talk in the hallway while you eat this,” he spoke in a quiet voice.

Julian silently began to eat while Elim and Dr. Grayson-Dramok moved into the hallway to speak privately. Soon enough the toast was gone and Julian set the box on the bed before laying back and closing his eyes. He was tired and had a headache, so he obviously needed a nap.

A few moments later, Elim returned to the room alone while Dr. Grayson-Dramok went off to her temporary living area to make some calls. Elim quickly disposed of the toast container and then gently tucked Julian in before going over to the neonatal chamber to check on Dax.

“Goodnight, little one,” Elim spoke in a gentle voice, caressing the chamber as he watched Dax drift off into what looked like a peaceful rest. “I hope you have pleasant dreams tonight.”

Sighing softly, Elim walked over to the bed and climbed under the covers next to Julian to rest as much as he could before he was again needed. To his surprise, Julian didn’t cuddle him and remained where he was as if he wasn’t aware or didn’t want to acknowledge anyone else.

 _I hope I did the right thing talking to Mary_. Elim thought worriedly to himself as he fell asleep.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

_“I think it will be better for all involved if he does recover there…”_

Elim’s gentle hand was the first thing Julian felt as he slowly came back to awareness. He opened his eyes and found his Cardassian husband sitting beside the bed holding his hand.

“Good morning, my dear,” Elim spoke in a kind voice. “How are you feeling?”

Julian sighed weakly, “ _Tired_ ,” he replied quietly. “I couldn’t feel you, so I didn’t rest well.”

A concerned expression crossed Elim’s face, “Julian, I _was_ in bed with you, but you didn’t respond to my presence,” he explained quietly. “You had a PTSD episode last night.”

“I…I _don’t_ remember it,” Julian replied softly, frowning. “It must have been pretty bad.”

Elim sighed, “I _don’t_ think this environment is helping you recover and so I talked to Mary about relocating you to a more comforting environment,” he explained. “Your parents’ home.”

“We _can’t_ leave Dax in London,” Julian said softly, frowning. “He _needs_ to be in a _hospital_.”

Before Elim could reply, Dr. Grayson-Dramok came into the room with Captain Sisko, “Captain,” Julian spoke in a quiet voice, his expression confused. “I thought you were in San Francisco?”

“I’m staying with Jake for the time being and am helping Chief O’Brien with his case,” Captain Sisko explained calmly. “For today, though, I’m here to help you and your family move.”

Julian sighed, “Dax needs a _hospital_ ,” he protested softly. “I _don’t_ want to make him…”

“Dax just needs the chamber and medical supervision,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok replied in a gentle voice, offering a smile. “The chamber is portable and can be moved to anywhere that’s safe.”

Julian’s frown deepened, “I can’t take care of him full-time yet even though I’ve got medical training,” he protested in a concerned voice. “I would love nothing more than to leave…”

“I talked with Admiral Grayson and I’ll be staying with you and Elim until the hearings,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok cut him off gently. “She asked Captain Sisko to come bring us all to New Zealand and your movements will be monitored, but you’ll be somewhere comfortable.”

Elim scowled at the mention of Julian’s movements being monitored, as he had tried to protest it to Sisko, but Sisko had told him that it was the best compromise Starfleet would allow given the situation. Julian, however, looked indifferent and nodded without offering any feedback.

“I brought you some clothes,” Captain Sisko spoke calmly as he produced a bag and set it on the bed. “Jake bought them and he’s busy with work otherwise he would have come with me.”

Julian nodded and Elim sighed, “If you’ll give us some privacy, I will help Julian get ready to go,” the Cardassian spoke, deeply concerned by Julian’s indifferent reaction. “Is Dax ready?”

“ _Julian_ can get himself ready to go in the bathroom,” Julian spoke in a quiet voice as he opened the bag and took the clothes out so he didn’t have to lift the bag. “If you’ll excuse me.”

Before anyone could stop him, Julian rose and slowly went into the nearby bathroom. The door slid shut and Elim was stunned. He looked at Captain Sisko and Dr. Grayson-Dramok worriedly.

“His mind has _regressed_ to when he was pregnant with Ricky,” Elim found himself saying even though he didn’t want to say it. “I’m worried about and for him. Will this really help him?”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sighed, “Stay with him and I’ll get Dax loaded on to the shuttle,” she replied in a concerned voice, not sure what else to say because she too was worried.

Elim nodded and moved over to the bathroom door while Dr. Grayson-Dramok went over to the neonatal chamber to get it and Dax ready for the shuttle ride. Captain Sisko also wandered over to the door, his expression immediately concerned because he could hear Julian crying.

“I hear it too,” Elim spoke quietly, sighing. “I’m hopeful that some rest in a familiar place…”

Captain Sisko nodded, his expression concerned as he moved away and Elim silently unlocked the door. To Elim’s surprise, Julian was huddled in a corner of the bathroom in the clothes Sisko had brought and he was shaking and sweating. The gown lay on the floor in a messy heap.

“Julian?” Elim asked in a concerned voice, frowning, “Julian, my dear. It’s Elim…”

Julian exhaled anxiously, “I had just changed clothes and then I suddenly saw myself back in that _horrible_ cell,” he managed to say in a weak, subdued voice. “I _can’t_ stop myself from…”

Elim silently moved forward and gently pried Julian away from the wall into his arms, “It’s _all right_ ,” he spoke in a gentle, soothing voice as he rubbed Julian’s back. “My dear…”

“That mood stabilizer I was on before the war,” Julian spoke softly. “I _need_ it again…I do.”

Elim released Julian, who looked distraught, “I _need_ it for my mind,” Julian stated. “ _Please_.”

Nodding, Elim helped Julian out of the bathroom just in time to see Dr. Grayson-Dramok move the neonatal chamber, “Doctor Grayson-Dramok, do you have a moment?” Julian asked in a quiet, slightly nervous voice. “I…I _need_ to be _sedated_ for the journey to New Zealand and then go back on the medicine I was taking on Deep Space Nine. My _mind_ …it _needs_ some _help_.”

Elim’s eyes widened at the mention of sedation, “I was going to suggest it anyway,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok replied in a patient voice, nodding at him. “Both things.”

Nodding, Julian shakily returned to the bed and sat because he couldn’t be on his feet for very long without help. He watched as Dr. Grayson-Dramok took the neonatal chamber from the room and came back a few moments later with an empty hoverchair.

“If you’re ready to go, we can go,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke in a kind voice. “Are you?”

Julian responded by silently getting up and going to the chair without asking for help, a move that concerned Elim greatly. Captain Sisko, however, didn’t look remotely surprised.

It didn’t take long for the group to get to the shuttle and Captain Sisko took his place at the controls while Elim sat next to the secured neonatal chamber where Dax was sleeping. Julian silently boarded the shuttle and sat alone, his head bowed and his expression subdued.

Dr. Grayson-Dramok boarded the shuttle with a small suitcase and medkit in her hands and frowned at seeing Julian sitting alone in a submissive state. She quietly opened her medkit as she sat next to Julian. He looked at her silently before eyeing the medkit anxiously.

“ _Please_ sedate me,” Julian pled in a soft voice, his expression unchanging. “I _need_ it.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok silently retrieved a hypospray from her medkit and administered it to Julian via his neck before strapping him in to his seat. She then gave Elim a look and Elim immediately came to Julian’s side, making himself comfortable before buckling up.

Sighing sleepily, Julian leaned against Elim and closed his eyes, “I _love_ you,” he mumbled.

“I love you too,” Elim spoke softly, placing a protective arm around his very ill husband.

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sat down next to the neonatal chamber with her things and buckled herself in as the boarding ramp closed, “Prepare for departure,” Captain Sisko stated.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**12 Hours Later - Wellington, New Zealand**

_“…We had a restful night, but Julian was sedated and so he probably doesn’t remember even getting here. I put him to bed and then read a story to Ricky before I went to bed myself…”_

Warmth filled Julian’s body and he opened his eyes to find himself comfortably tucked into one half of what appeared to be a double bed. He was in a slightly elevated position with pillows beneath his back and the dripline pole had been set up in between the bed and a table.

Sighing weakly, Julian slowly sat up and was surprised to see Kukulaka tumble down the chest of the shirt he had been wearing. He silently picked up the bear and held it against himself, deeply relieved that someone had thought to give him the bear while he rested.

“Julian?”

Julian looked up from the bear and was surprised to see his mother come into the room with a breakfast tray that contained yogurt, applesauce, tea, and scones, “I made you breakfast,” Amsha spoke in a kind, soothing voice as she came over to the bed and sat. “You _must_ eat.”

“Mum, I’m _not_ well,” Julian spoke in a faint voice, his expression sad. “I’m _broken_.”

Amsha gave him a look, “Broken things can be fixed with enough time and love, my son,” she replied in a patient voice, her expression loving. “They may not be the same as they originally were, but they are _still_ beautiful. You’ll get plenty of rest and love here, Julian. I promise.”

Julian shrugged, but was prevented from speaking further because Amsha proceeded to feed him the entire tray of food bit by bit until the dishes were empty, “Mummy, _thank you_ ,” he said in a quiet voice, his expression tired. “Did…did Elim tell you that I’m being monitored?”

“Yes,” Amsha replied in a concerned voice. “We had breakfast with him and his doctor friend and she is in a call with Starfleet now. Elim is spending time with your father, Ricky, and Dax.”

Julian nodded, his expression filled with tiredness and frustration because he was ill, tired of being ill, but also feeling guilty because he was now safe when he felt he didn’t deserve to be. Amsha set the tray aside and gently took his hands in her own, offering a reassuring smile.

Just then, Elim came into the room carrying Ricky, who was wearing a blue onesie and holding a simple picture book, in his arms. Ricky squealed at seeing Julian and held his arms out eagerly.

“Ricky wants you to read to him,” Elim explained calmly. “If you’re not feeling up to it…”

Julian paused, “I’m _not sure_ I can read to him yet, but I’d like to see him,” he replied softly.

Amsha quickly moved and Elim sat on the bed with Ricky. Julian reached out and let Ricky touch his hands, “Ricky and Dax are sharing a room and it’s right next door to ours,” Elim explained.

A wave of tiredness filled Julian and he nodded as Dr. Grayson-Dramok suddenly came into the room looking unusually somber, “I just talked to Starfleet,” she spoke in a serious voice. “Admiral Ross is trying to get the charges against him dismissed on the grounds that Julian’s mentally unfit to participate in court proceedings due to the experiment. Starfleet’s debating and wants Julian to see a counselor…”

“Are they _out of their minds_?!” Elim asked in an upset voice, frowning. “Julian’s been through _enough_!”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sighed, “Elim, If Julian was to take the stand today, Starfleet would tear him apart and the charges against Admiral Ross and Doctor Girani would be _dropped_!” she replied firmly, glaring at her friend before looking at Julian apologetically. “I observed enough over the last few days that I’m inclined to _agree_ that you need psychological counseling before I think you’re ready to testify.”

“Am I _ever_ going to be well enough to address what they did?” Julian asked in a quiet voice, his mind reeling with the fact that Starfleet now saw him as unstable and could use that to free his tormentors.

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sighed, “Between counseling and the medication you mentioned, you might be ready to testify by the end of the year at the earliest,” she replied in a concerned voice, knowing that the help Julian needed wouldn’t be quick or easy. “You’re _not_ in a good place right now at all.”

By that point, Julian was too exhausted to keep talking and he closed his eyes to rest, “He still tires quite easily,” he heard Elim say in a gentle voice. “I know you’re right that he needs time before he testifies…”

Silence filled the room and Julian suddenly felt Elim’s form next to him in the bed, “… _I know this is hard on you, Elim_ ,” Julian found himself saying in a weak voice while his eyes remained closed. “ _If you want to go, you can. I’ll pay for it._ ”

Elim put Ricky on his lap and gave Julian a look, “ _Go_?” he replied in a confused voice. “ _Go where_?”

“ _Back to Cardassia_ ,” Julian spoke in a sleepy voice, sighing. “ _I’m only holding you three back_. _If you want to go, I'll let you go.”_

An mixed expression of shock and concern filled Elim’s face as he watched Julian fully slip into sleep.


	10. Suffering and Corruption

**Wellington, New Zealand**

The days went on and Elim found himself growing more frustrated and sad by the day because he felt like he was losing his husband to what had happened. Julian was physically there, but he’d spend his days in bed as much as possible or sitting awake at night, crying quietly.

Instead of trying to draw Julian out of his shell, however, Richard and Amsha had simply let him be and had focused their attentions on Ricky and Dax. Elim had likewise spent time with the little ones, but he also made an effort to try and engage Julian in simple conversation at times.

Dr. Grayson-Dramok had actually said very little about Julian’s behavior and had spent her time in her room on comms or in town. She had observed Julian’s behavior and was concerned, but Elim assumed that she was respecting Cardassian tradition and letting him address the situation with his own spouse. The trouble, however, was that Elim was feeling frustrated and helpless.

That morning in particular was a stormy one and Elim found himself sitting in the living room huddled under a blanket and working on plans for the Botanical Restoration Project. He would eventually need to be _on_ Cardassia to execute the project, but that was a long way off given the current situation and he couldn’t even _consider_ returning to Cardassia until Julian had healed.

A childish giggle suddenly filled the air and Elim looked up from his PADD to see Ricky sitting on the carpet with simple toys sporting a pleasant expression. Ricky looked up at Elim and smiled.

“Well, _hello there_ ,” Elim spoke warmly, setting his PADD on the table. “How are you doing?”

Ricky babbled before lifting his arms, indicating that he wanted to be picked up. Elim happily obliged and planted a kiss on Ricky’s forehead before settling the toddler on his knee.

“…Good morning, Julian, would you like some breakfast?” Elim suddenly heard Amsha ask.

Elim froze, “I _don’t know_ , Mum,” Julian’s voice replied softly. “I’m _not_ feeling well.”

“Should we go say good morning to your other daddy?” Elim asked softly, gazing at Ricky.

Ricky suddenly went very quiet, “Dada sad,” he said in a quiet voice. “Dada sad.”

Nodding, Elim moved Ricky to his shoulder as he got up and moved into the kitchen. Amsha was sitting at the kitchen table with Julian, giving him a worried look while she held his hand. Julian was wearing the clothes he had worn the day before and looked completely exhausted.

“What _time_ did you come to bed last night?” Elim asked quietly, giving Julian a worried look.

Julian sighed tiredly, “I _didn’t_ ,” he admitted in a tired voice. “I couldn’t rest and I sat in the backyard thinking. I _know_ Starfleet’s been making it hard to get the meds I need…”

“Doctor Grayson-Dramok went into town to see if she can get them locally and your father went with her because she doesn’t know her way around,” Elim explained, having seen them off earlier that morning. “Starfleet’s trying to set you up to _fail_ so Admiral Ross will get off…”

“I _think_ you’re _right_ ,” Julian replied in a quiet, somber voice. “They _want_ to make sure I don’t get declared fit to testify because some of them think Admiral Ross was _right_ in hurting me.”

Elim sighed, “If Lady Dramok can’t get the medication locally, she intends to call the Castellan to see if Cardassia or worlds friendly to it can get it for you,” he spoke softly. “I’m _so sorry_ …”

Julian nodded silently, his expression somber, “Did you want Ricky on your lap?” Elim asked, knowing that Julian was hurting and didn’t know what to say. “It _might_ help you feel…”

“ _No_ , I might go for a walk outside,” Julian replied softly. “Just up and down the beach.”

Elim gave Julian a look as Amsha rose from the table, “My dear, it’s _storming_ outside,” he spoke in a quiet, but kind voice. “You’re _still_ recovering and the weather might be too much for you.”

“I’ll put on rain gear,” Julian replied softly. “I also have to call San Francisco today to see when the counselor’s supposed to come. When they come, I’ll stay in town so not to be a bother.”

Elim scowled, “Julian, you’re anything but a _bother_ ,” he replied, frowning as Julian got up and left the kitchen. “Julian, I just told you it’s storming outside! You’re going to get sick!”

When no reply came, Elim settled Ricky in the highchair and followed after Julian. He found his husband just in time to see Julian nearly collapse against the coat rack with a raincoat in hand.

“ _Julian_ …” Elim spoke in a concerned voice, frowning at him. “Julian, _please_ …talk to me.”

Julian sighed, “My abdomen hurts,” he managed to say. “And my ankles are killing me, but I _can’t_ feel any emotions about either of them. I _need_ to go outside so I can _feel_ something.”

“If you’re in physical pain, we _should_ visit a doctor,” Elim spoke calmly. “It’s _not_ far.”

Julian looked taken aback, “ _We_?” he asked softly. “I’m _sure_ you have _responsibilities_ …”

“ _Family_ is my _main_ responsibility and that includes _you_ ,” Elim spoke softly, decreasing the distance between them. “And we _don’t_ have to _walk_. We can take the _transporter_ to town.”

Too exhausted and sore to argue, Julian nodded and silently allowed Elim to take control.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**San Francisco, California**

“… _I don’t understand why it was so easy to get Doctor Bashir-Garak the medication he needed when he was on Deep Space Nine, but it’s near impossible now_ ,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok spoke in a frustrated voice as she looked at Admiral Grayson via a viewscreen. “ _What are your thoughts_?”

Admiral Grayson sighed from the comfort of her desk, “I’m going to level with you, Mary,” she replied in a concerned voice, her expression serious. “Doctor Bashir-Garak has very few in his corner within Starfleet. Many feel that what Admiral Ross was trying to do with his experiment was _correct_ given Doctor Bashir-Garak’s status. Starfleet took heavy losses in the war…”

“ _But to kidnap, torture, forcibly impregnate, and nearly kill Doctor-Bashir isn’t considered wrong_?” Dr. Grayson-Dramok asked in a concerned voice. “ _He’s a human being_.”

Admiral Grayson sighed, “He’d be a _lot_ worse off if it weren’t for President Zife wanting to try and bring Cardassia into the Federation,” she explained grimly. “Legate Garak is here and a guest of the Federation, so _that_ is _why_ Doctor Bashir-Garak is allowed to be where he is right now. If he was alone, he’d be either confined to Starfleet properties here or imprisoned…”

“ _Does anyone even care that a human being was abducted and tortured nearly to death_?” Dr. Grayson-Dramok asked in a shocked, almost angry voice. “ _And that a Starfleet Admiral and a Bajoran doctor were responsible for that happening? This is corruption at the highest level_.”

Admiral Grayson nodded and looked very sad, “The bottom line is that Doctor Bashir-Garak _disobeyed orders_ and he’s _going_ to be court-martialed, something that Starfleet would have eventually done anyway given his status,” she replied. “Admiral Ross is _highly_ respected among many and ever since Doctor Bashir murdered Luther Sloan, some have considered him…”

“ _And what about you, Martha_?” Dr. Grayson-Dramok asked softly. “ _What do you think_?”

Admiral Grayson raised an eyebrow, “I’m doing _all that I can_ to expedite the process and make it as easy as possible for Doctor Bashir-Garak given that he was nearly killed by Admiral Ross’s experiment,” she replied in a firm voice. “Unfortunately, the Bajoran government is asking Colonel Kira to help extradite Doctor Girani to Bajor for their own legal proceedings and so that might complicate matters here. President Zife also wants Captain Drammell sent back to DS9.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok frowned, but didn’t say anything, “He’s being treated at Starfleet Medical right now, but it seems Doctor Bashir-Garak’s blood helped him _immensely_ ,” Admiral Grayson continued softly. “Starfleet has taken testimony from Sarina Douglas already and she wants to leave Earth as soon as possible. She’s feeling _very_ violated by what Admiral Ross did…”

“ _Is there any danger that she might seek the baby out_?” Dr. Grayson-Dramok asked worriedly.

Admiral Grayson shook her head, “Not at the moment and she has no legal recourse anyway because you listed _Legate Garak_ as the other parent on the birth certificate,” she explained in a quiet voice. “For now, she is staying with Malko Marratt and Captain Staveli. There’s still the matter of whether or not Cardassia will charge Captain Staveli for participating in the abduction of a Cardassian citizen, but she’s absolved of any crime here due to her role in finding Bashir.”

“ _Admiral Grayson, your appointment is here_ ,” a voice suddenly said over the intercom.

The vid-call suddenly dropped and Admiral Grayson sighed, “Send them in,” she said, turning her attention to the intercom as she sat straighter in her chair to receive her appointment.

Silence filled the air and Admiral Grayson’s expression softened when she saw Commander Troi come into the room, “Ah, Commander, welcome,” she spoke calmly, rising from her seat. “I called you here to ask you to take Doctor Bashir-Garak on as a patient. It _will_ require _time_ …”

Deanna looked thoughtful, “I _thought_ Starfleet Medical was assigning someone?” she asked.

“Let’s be real, they _don’t_ care about Doctor Bashir-Garak and want him to be in the worst shape possible so that he can’t give testimony against Admiral Ross,” Admiral Grayson explained in a concerned voice. “I _want_ Doctor Bashir to be able to give his testimony, however....”

Deanna nodded, “When I was visiting with Chief O’Brien at Starfleet Security earlier, he asked about Doctor Bashir-Garak and I _promised_ I’d pass it along,” she replied. “How is he doing?”

“Chief O’Brien’s facing _hard time_ at the New Zealand penal colony for breaching probation and he’s worried about Doctor Bashir-Garak?” Admiral Grayson asked, surprised. “ _Interesting_.”

Deanna sighed, “He’s worried about his wife and children too and what they’ll do when he gets transferred to prison, but Keiko is very resourceful,” she replied. “It’s _unfortunate_ that…”

“He participated in a _murder_ and then _breached probation_ ,” Admiral Grayson stated firmly, cutting her off. “I would have simply slapped an ankle bracelet on him, but he’s _already proven_ once that he _can’t_ listen to orders. He’s being treated humanely and is allowed family visits.”

Deanna looked uneasy, but merely nodded, “I’ll be happy to take Doctor Bashir-Garak on as a patient,” she spoke in a calm voice. “Is he going to come to San Francisco or will I go see him?”

“I’ll give you _all_ the particulars,” Admiral Grayson replied, relieved that Deanna had agreed.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Wellington, New Zealand**

_Prescription unavailable. Patient must undergo physical examination prior to any treatment due to being a security risk._

Cursing angrily, Dr. Grayson-Dramok smacked the computer in frustration. She had tried to get Doctor Bashir-Garak a supply of medication so he could start feeling better, but the computer _insisted_ that Doctor Bashir was too much of a risk to be helped. Doctor Bashir _needed_ it to get well. He wasn’t some drug-seeker needing a fix; he was a _Human being_ with _very real_ problems. She had credentials to get him what he needed, but the computer didn’t seem to care about them.

Sighing irritably, she stepped away from the prescription computer and was on her way to the long-distance vid-calls when she heard a familiar whimper, “Can we get an _actual_ person here?!” Elim’s irritated voice filled the air. “ _Medical holograms_ …how _unseemly_ …”

Frowning, Dr. Grayson-Dramok moved towards the voices just in time to see Elim swear at a medical hologram. The same medical hologram was standing over Julian, who was laying on an exam bed looking tired, unkempt, and miserable. Dr. Grayson-Dramok cleared her throat.

“Julian’s _not_ well and the staff here stuck us with a _holographic_ doctor,” Elim spat bitterly, a scowl on his face.

Dr. Grayson-Dramok nodded and gazed down at Julian worriedly, “My abdomen _hurts_ and my feet hurt really badly every time I stand,” Julian spoke in a quiet voice. “I also can’t feel any sort of emotions. My stomach and feet hurt, but I _can’t_ feel anything but the pain from them.”

“Scans show inflammations in the abdomen and ankles,” the holographic doctor reported. “I have put in a request for _further_ testing, but this is a _low_ priority according to Starfleet files.”

Elim scowled and Dr. Grayson-Dramok quickly accessed the scan for herself, “ _Fortunately_ , it’s nothing serious,” she said after a few moments of studying the scans. “You’ve got inflammation because you’re _not_ taking care of yourself or letting others take care of you. Your body is still very much healing from two major surgeries and your ankles haven’t completely healed either.”

“I _want_ to rest, but my mind won’t let me,” Julian replied softly. “My mind feels _broken_.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok nodded and looked at the holographic doctor, “Hook Doctor Bashir-Garak up with some fluids,” she ordered, determined to use the holographic entity since it was there.

“Julian?” Richard Bashir spoke in a concerned voice, spotting Julian on a bed as he came back from the canteen after getting tea to pass the time while Dr. Grayson-Dramok did her work.

Dr. Grayson-Dramok said nothing, listening to the three talk as she worked. She quietly used the security code she had as the wife of the Castellan of Cardassia to order a decent amount of medication for Dr. Bashir-Garak, knowing that Starfleet wouldn’t dare disrupt the order for fear of damaging relations between the Federation and Cardassia. She sighed and looked at Julian.

“Did you want to go back to your parents house and rest while I get the medication arranged for you or did you want to rest here?” Dr. Grayson-Dramok asked softly. “You can choose.”

Julian sighed tiredly, “Elim, if I want to leave, will you carry me and hold me in bed?” he asked in a groggy voice, gazing up at his Cardassian husband. “I _want_ to _rest_ , but _not_ in a _hospital_ …”

The holographic doctor glared at Dr. Grayson-Dramok, “And the fluids?” he asked irritably.

“Of _course_ I’ll carry you and hold you in bed, my dear,” Elim replied softly. “I _love_ you.”

Julian exhaled softly, “Then we can go,” he replied in a tired voice. “As soon as possible.”

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

Thanks to Richard’s skilled driving in the manual vehicle that he and Amsha had bought after he had been released from prison, Julian and Elim made it back to the house quickly. Instead of letting Julian go straight to bed, however, Elim forced him into a hot bath and gently scrubbed him from head to toe before dressing him in clean clothes that would help him relax more.

After Julian was in bed, Elim had asked Amsha to make something warm and easy to eat so that Julian would feel better. Richard focused his attention on Ricky and Dax, reading to both of them so that they wouldn’t bother Elim or Julian. Not that either child was a bother, however.

As Julian lay in bed, allowing Elim to feed him homecooked soup, he couldn’t help but wonder how long Dax would be confined to the neonatal chamber. Even though he himself wasn’t well physically or mentally, he wanted to hold Dax and bond with him as he had done with Ricky.

“What’s on your mind, my dear?” Elim asked softly, noticing that Julian wasn’t talking.

Julian sighed, “I want to hold Dax and not have him stuck in that horrible box all of the time,” he replied in a quiet voice. “I know he needs it right now, but maybe holding him would help me feel something. I have the desire to be a better person, husband, son, and father, but…”

“You already _are_ , Julian,” Elim stated in a concerned voice. “You’re a little broken right now, but once you get your medication and a bit stronger, I’m _sure_ you’ll be feeling somewhat better…”

Julian shrugged, “If I was _really_ strong, Miles _wouldn’t have had_ to come find me and end up in _jail_ ,” he mused quietly, fatigue quickly overwhelming his awareness. “ _Oh_ , I could use a _nap_.”

“Then a _nap_ is what you shall have,” Elim replied, setting the soup on the bedside table.

Julian nodded as he lay down and pulled Kukulaka into his arms. Elim also lay down and gently embraced his husband from behind, hoping beyond hope that they weren’t disturbed for a bit.

“Elim?” Amsha’s voice suddenly filled the air. “There’s a call from San Francisco for you.”

Sighing softly, Elim reluctantly released Julian and got up to answer the call. He was surprised to see Captain Sisko’s face on the vid-feed, “Captain Sisko, what can I do for you?” he asked softly.

“ _I just wanted you to know that I’ll be going off-planet for a little while, but I plan to be back before Doctor Bashir’s court-martial_ ,” Captain Sisko explained calmly, his expression calm. “ _Jake wanted to come with me, but I told him to stay and report on the ongoing situation because his journalism talents can make sure that Doctor Bashir and Chief O’Brien are treated fairly.”_

Elim frowned, “I trust you’re going to see Captain Yates?” he asked. “She’s missed you.”

“ _Actually, I’m going to be helping Colonel Kira escort Captain Drammell back to Deep Space Nine because Starfleet has an assignment for him and for us_ ,” Captain Sisko replied in a concerned voice, sighing. “ _There’s a strong possibility that the U.S.S. Monroe is simply missing_ …”

Elim’s eyes widened in surprise, “Wasn’t that the ship Nog was on?” he asked softly.

“ _Based on the limited report Admiral Ross provided on the supposed destruction of the Monroe, Admiral Grayson wants a team to meet up at Deep Space Nine to further the investigation_ ,” Captain Sisko explained. “ _This is going to be a_ _highly dangerous_ _mission_.”

Elim sighed, “Well, I can make sure _Julian_ is well cared for, but Chief O’Brien is _still_ in Starfleet custody and will be there until further notice,” he replied. “Julian has to get _counseling_ ….”

“ _Admiral Grayson confided in me that she asked Commander Deanna Troi to help Julian so he’ll have a fighting chance against Starfleet_ ,” Captain Sisko spoke in a quiet voice. “ _She’ll contact Julian in a few days to arrange a meeting and Commander Troi will travel there so Julian doesn’t have to travel_.”

Elim nodded and suddenly looked thoughtful, “Did Jake wish to come with you because he and Lieutenant Nog were close?” he asked softly. “Jake did tell me that he and Nog…they were _close_.”

“ _I’m very pleased to hear that_ ,” Captain Sisko replied, smiling. “ _And I’m not really that surprised_.”

Elim sighed, “At any rate, I will tell Julian that you will be _unavailable_ if he does ask about you,” he replied in a patient voice, his expression tired. “Captain, I hope you do find the Monroe…I really do.”

Captain Sisko nodded and the call ended, but the vid-feed beeped again before Elim could move, “ _Incoming call from Cardassia Prime_ ,” the computer spoke. “ _Incoming call from Cardassia Prime_.”

Elim quickly answered and was stunned to see Castellan Dramok on the feed, “Castellan,” he said.

“ _Legate, I just got a call from Lady Dramok saying that Starfleet is withholding needed medicine from Doctor Bashir-Garak and they’re trying to get the charges against his tormentors dismissed_?” Castellan Dramok asked in a stern, but concerned voice. “ _I want you to tell me everything that’s been happening since your husband was rescued by Sisko_.”

Elim’s eyebrows raised, “You’re _not_ going to like it, but I will tell you _everything_ ,” he promised softly.

Castellan Dramok nodded and listened intently as Elim began to recall what had happened since Julian had been rescued.


	11. Extreme Dangers

**One Week Later**

**Earth Spacedock**

Admiral Grayson assumed a stern expression on her face as she stepped off of the shuttle that had delivered her to the spacedock from San Francisco. She had been communicating with those who had gone to Deep Space Nine to search for the Monroe when President Zife had contacted her out of the blue and asked her to come to the Spacedock immediately.

The stern look on Admiral Grayson’s face suddenly faded when she spotted President Zife talking with a dark-haired male Cardassian who was wearing a dark pantsuit with a high collar, a regal looking vest, boots, and glasses with a bag in his hand. Beside him stood another male Cardassian who was wearing dark blue clothes and looking extremely self-conscious as he held a ragged looking backpack over one shoulder. President Zife turned to face Admiral Grayson.

“Ah, Admiral Grayson, welcome,” President Zife spoke in a diplomatic voice. “May I present Castellan Dramok of Cardassia and his companion, Doctor Galen Dastra of Cardassia? It _seems_ they’ve decided to come explore more of what Starfleet and the Federation has to offer.”

Castellan Dramok nodded diplomatically, “ _Providing_ that we are permitted to visit with Legate Garak and his husband, Doctor Julian Bashir-Garak, _as we agreed_ ,” he replied in a firm voice.

“ _Admiral Grayson_ can escort you there,” President Zife replied calmly, knowing _full well_ that the Cardassians were here to make sure that Julian Bashir wasn’t being mistreated. “Admiral?”

Admiral Grayson nodded as President Zife walked away, she gestured to the way from which she had come, “We can take this shuttle there,” she offered softly. “How was your journey?”

Neither Cardassian, however, spoke, until they were on board the shuttle and away from Spacedock. Castellan Dramok sat beside Admiral Grayson while Galen sat alone, across from them with his eyes trained on the floor. He felt very self-conscious around this Human.

“Legate Garak expressed _concerns_ to me about Starfleet’s treatment of his husband and so I felt it necessary to come assess the situation for myself,” Castellan Dramok spoke in a quiet voice, his expression serious. “Of course, Starfleet would _not_ issue travel permits unless I agreed to be taken on diplomatic tours and so I agreed. I also wish to visit Miles O’Brien while I am here.”

Admiral Grayson nodded, “Wellington, New Zealand,” she ordered, gazing at the android pilot sternly before gazing back at the Castellan. “And you thought it _necessary_ to bring a _doctor_?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Castellan Dramok replied calmly, looking as if he didn’t wish to elaborate further.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Wellington, New Zealand**

It was very early in the morning, but Julian was awake and sitting in a chair that was next to the neonatal chamber where Dax was sleeping. Not very far away, Ricky was asleep in a crib.

The medicine still hadn’t come, but Julian was fighting to keep himself sane and it was taking all of the energy he was allowed to exert given his doctor’s orders to rest. He had put himself through the motions of eating, sleeping, and hygiene, but his emotions were _absent_ and he knew that it was taking a toll on all of the adults around him, but he couldn’t help it.

Dr. Grayson-Dramok had tried repeatedly to get the medicine for him, but she hadn’t been able to get any help from Starfleet Medical. She had reached out to Starfleet Command, but had been told that Starfleet was busy with post-war affairs and that they simply didn’t have the resources to supply an illegal Augment with an ongoing supply of medication that could be used to help those truly in need. Julian _knew_ Starfleet simply _didn’t care_ about his welfare anymore.

His inability to feel emotions was why Julian was awake so early and why he was sitting in the room where his sons slept. Perhaps, just perhaps, being near his children would help him.

“My dear, it’s _early_ ,” Julian suddenly heard Elim speak softly. “I couldn’t feel you next to me.”

Julian sighed, his expression neutral as he gazed up at Elim, “I thought being around the kids might _help_ me feel some emotion,” he explained in a quiet voice. “I _want_ to feel something.”

Elim nodded, his expression concerned, “It’s a warm day out,” he spoke softly. “We could go sit on the beach and have a breakfast picnic if you would like. We could also cook together…”

“You know I _can’t_ cook,” Julian replied softly. “Oh, _goodness_ , I _want_ to _laugh_ at that, but…”

Elim sighed, “I _know_ ,” he replied gently. “We could even go sit outside without breakfast.”

“I might try some school-type things with Ricky today,” Julian spoke softly. “To pass time.”

Even though Elim wanted to get mad that Julian was purposely avoiding anything to do with marital or familial affection, he knew he _couldn’t_ because Julian wasn’t behaving this way on purpose. Whatever Admiral Ross and Dr. Girani had done had caused some _very real_ damage.

“ _Incoming call from Port of Wellington_ ,” an automated voice suddenly filled the house.

Elim frowned and moved over to the vid-feed, sighing as he accepted the call. He was stunned to see Admiral Grayson and Castellan Dramok on the screen along with a brooding Galen.

“Castellan?” Elim spoke in a confused voice. “What are you and Galen doing on Earth?”

Julian slowly stood and eyed the screen, but stayed out of sight because he didn’t want the Castellan and Galen to see him in his current state, “ _We will have time to talk in a little while_ ,” Castellan Dramok spoke in a formal voice. “ _Doctor Dastra and I are just getting settled at our accommodation in the city and then Admiral Grayson will bring us to pay you a visit_.”

Elim’s eyes were so focused on the screen that he didn’t notice that Julian had slipped out of the room in a hurry to wake his parents and get himself in a semi-presentable state. Admiral Grayson looked either overly tired or very unhappy, but she didn’t offer any comments contrary to what the Castellan was saying. Elim likewise didn’t protest, as it was _much too late_ for that.

“We’ll be _ready_ for your visit,” Elim spoke in a polite voice. “Will you expect a meal?”

Castellan Dramok looked amused, “ _Whatever you like_ ,” he replied calmly. “ _See you in a while_.”

The screen went black and Elim sighed before leaving the room. He arrived back in his and Julian’s room just in time to see Julian’s legs give out, sending Julian on to the bed half-dressed.

Elim was quick to respond and gently helped Julian into a sitting position, “I was dressing and my legs and feet gave out,” Julian spoke in a quiet voice, frowning. “Maybe I overdid it.”

A thoughtful expression suddenly crossed Elim’s face, “Now seems as good a time as any to give you a surprise I’ve been working on,” he spoke calmly, reaching under the bed and pulling out a wrapped box. “I stay up a _lot_ later than you do and it’s _so cold_ outside in the evenings, so I’ve been making things I thought might make you feel more comfortable about being here.”

Julian eyed the box before taking it and clumsily unwrapping it. Once it was unwrapped, Julian opened the box and saw a pair of dark, boot-like slippers, “What are these?” he asked softly.

“Slipper boots to help you be able to walk a little easier,” Elim explained calmly. “I measured your feet while you slept and I picked materials that would go with any clothes you wear.”

Julian sighed, “I _want_ to be happy and grateful…” he spoke in a toneless voice. “But _I_ …”

“ _No matter_ ,” Elim spoke, taking the boots. “Let’s get you bathed and dressed now, shall we?”

Swallowing hard, Julian said nothing and simply submitted to letting Elim take care of him.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

Nearly an hour later, smells of breakfast food filled the house after Richard and Amsha had been woken by Elim and told of the pending arrival of guests. Amsha quickly dressed and went into overdrive making sure there would be enough food for everyone while Richard quickly prepared the house. Dr. Grayson-Dramok, meanwhile, prepared for her husband’s arrival.

After making sure Julian was ready, Elim quickly prepared himself for the day and then fed Dax his supplement before waking Ricky for the day. Ricky greeted him with a smile and wave.

“We’re going to have some guests today, so you will _need_ to _behave_ yourself,” Elim explained calmly as he changed the toddler’s diaper and clothing. “Let’s go visit your other daddy.”

Ricky cooed happily, his smile growing when Elim carried him into the living room where Julian was resting in an oversized chair with his feet up. Elim set the toddler next to Julian and sighed.

“The boots look _lovely_ on you,” Elim commented, watching Ricky touch Julian’s face.

Julian nodded, closing his eyes to rest and prompting Elim to sit in a nearby chair to watch them in silence. For a few moments, the only sounds that could be heard were sounds associated with cooking and quiet talking in the kitchen. Suddenly, a loud chime filled the house.

Footsteps filled the air, but Julian and Elim remained where they were because neither one had the energy nor the desire to move, “…My dear, you look as _lovely_ as ever,” Castellan Dramok’s voice filled the house. “Mister Bashir, thank you for having us. I _know_ it was _short_ notice…”

“…Mary, might we talk outside before breakfast… _alone_?” Admiral Grayson suddenly asked softly, a tone that Julian and Elim both heard and found unusual given her personality.

The door opened and closed and Julian sat up just in time to see his father lead Castellan Dramok and a surly looking Galen into the living room. Castellan Dramok sat on the couch with Richard, but Galen sat on the floor and didn’t look at or speak to Elim and Julian at all.

“What’s got you in a _funk_ , Galen?” Elim asked in a quiet voice, eyeing his friend calmly.

Castellan Dramok sighed, “I _lost_ my spot in Tent City when I got sick,” Galen said with a sigh.

“I brought Doctor Dastra with me to Earth so he could have time to figure things out and to _help_ ensure that your husband is _well cared for_ since Starfleet’s doing a _terrible_ job of it, Legate,” Castellan Dramok spoke firmly, gazing at Elim and Julian. “Doctor Bashir-Garak…”

Julian sighed, “Doctor Grayson-Dramok _tried_ to get me some mood stabilizers that helped me when I was on Deep Space Nine, but she _can’t_ ,” he replied softly. “I _want_ to _feel_ _emotions_ and not have my body give out at random times because I’m _too weak_ to do even simple tasks.”

Galen looked surprised, “You were doing better before the kidnappings,” he replied in a concerned voice, his eyes narrowing at Julian. “If you’re _so unwell_ , _why_ are you not in a _hospital_ and being given medicine? Earth has _many_ hospitals and Starfleet is supposed to be the _best_ …”

Julian suddenly turned very pale and Elim frowned, “ _M…migraine_ ,” Julian managed to stammer.

Nodding, Elim quickly got up and got Julian out of his chair while leaving Ricky there. He hustled Julian from the room and made it to the bathroom just in time for Julian to vomit into the sink.

Heaving, Julian only vomited for a few moments before collapsing against Elim, “Galen _obviously_ doesn’t read the news,” Elim spoke in an anxious voice. “Deep breaths…”

Julian did as he was told and when he was calm, Elim guided him back to the living room, “I _was_ in one for a few days, but I _wasn’t_ getting better,” he explained shakily. “I’m _still not_.”

“I meant no disrespect to you or to Legate Garak,” Galen replied apologetically. “If you wish to administer _punishment_ , I prefer lashes on my back. The scars already there provide padding.”

Julian frowned and Elim looked appalled, “You mean you _never_ got those taken care of?” Elim asked in a concerned voice, worried for his friend. “The _purpose_ of Dukat _adopting_ you…”

“Well, he _never_ got around to it,” Galen cut him off firmly. “Anyway, is there a meal?”

Richard nodded, his expression concerned at Galen implying that he survived physical abuse of some kind, “My wife, Amsha, has made some _wonderful_ food,” he replied in a kind voice.

“You all go ahead,” Julian spoke in a quiet voice, his expression neutral. “I’m _not_ hungry.”

Elim gave Julian a look, as they had this discussion every morning and that discussion usually resulted in him forcing Julian to eat whether he wanted to or not. Julian, however, didn’t move.

Castellan Dramok sighed patiently and left the room in search of his wife, as he could tell that this was a daily occurrence for Elim and Julian and they were best left to sort it out between themselves. Richard looked worried and Galen looked somewhat apologetic.

Elim, however, simply lifted Julian from the chair and guided him into the bedroom that the children shared, “Do you see Dax there?” the Cardassian asked softly as they approached the neonatal chamber where Dax was now sleeping. “You gave _every bit_ of yourself to make sure he had a chance and he’s _still_ fighting. You _shouldn’t_ give up your fight because he _cannot_ …”

Julian silently placed his hands on the neonatal chamber, “You’re _disrespecting_ whatever Captain Sisko did for you by _not letting others help you heal_ ,” Elim spoke in a softer voice.

When Julian offered no immediate reply, Elim sighed and left the room, “I wish I was as _strong_ as you are, little Dax, and as strong as Ricky is,” Julian spoke in a soft voice. “I really do.”

Dax continued to sleep and as Julian continued to watch him, he suddenly felt someone slip an arm around him, “My dear, I feel I was _too harsh_ on you,” Elim’s voice spoke. “I’m _sorry_.”

Tears filled Julian’s eyes and he whimpered before he began to cry quietly, “Julian, will you _please_ come eat _something_?” Elim asked, giving his husband a gentle hug. “Please?”

Julian nodded and followed Elim to the dining room where Richard and Castellan Dramok were enjoying breakfast while Amsha was feeding Ricky. Dr. Grayson-Dramok and Admiral Grayson were nowhere to be seen and Elim couldn’t help but feel somewhat concerned about that.

Elim helped Julian sit and sat next to him, filling both their plates without hesitation. As the two began to eat, Dr. Grayson-Dramok and Admiral Grayson came into the dining room and sat at the table. Dr. Grayson-Dramok looked unusually subdued and Admiral Grayson looked sad.

“Doctor Bashir-Garak, I need to make a confession to you,” Admiral Grayson spoke as Julian finished the small amount that was on his plate. “While you know that Starfleet has been monitoring you, it’s _not_ for the reasons that you think. We’ve been _monitoring_ your _health.”_

Silence filled the room and everyone looked at her quizzically except for Dr. Grayson-Dramok, “I’ve had a chance to look over what data was found at the facility where you were held,” Admiral Grayson explained in a quiet voice. “It’s very similar to _other_ records I’ve seen.”

“You mean there have been _others_ experimented on with Dominion technology?” Julian asked in a quiet voice, his expression concerned even though he was unable to feel any. “How?”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sighed, “When I saved your life on Deep Space Nine, I was found out and paid a _visit_ by Starfleet,” she replied softly. “It turned cancerous, but you managed to help me.”

“ _Cancer_ is _supposed_ to be a thing of the _past_ ,” Richard spoke in a worried voice. “Why…?”

Admiral Grayson sighed tiredly and Julian immediately looked at her, “ _No_ ,” he said in a voice teetering on concern, frowning. “Don’t…don’t tell me that they infected you with… _whatever_.”

“I’m sorry, but I’ve got _no_ appetite,” Admiral Grayson apologized, slowly getting up from the table. “I would have been _resting_ at my apartment today had President Zife not asked me…”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok quickly got up and ushered her sister off out of sight. Even though he himself was feeling tired, Julian also got up and followed after them because he was still a doctor and could maybe use his intelligence and skills to help even without emotion.

A faint whimper filled the air as Julian approached the sunroom door, which was open a slight crack, “Can I be of help?” he called out in a quiet voice, the walk through the house tiring him.

The door opened and Dr. Grayson-Dramok came out before closing it, “She just needs to rest,” she explained in a quiet voice. “Admiral Ross selected you for the experiment because you’re an Augment and managed to survive the first Dominion-engineered pregnancy unlike others…”

“So you’ve seen the notes?” Julian asked in a confused voice. “What exactly did they say?”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sighed, “They’re written in Dominion script and Starfleet’s _tried_ to get Admiral Ross to share what they said, as he’s _obviously_ translated them, but he _won’t_ ,” she explained. “Elim _can_ do it and he’s willing, but he was also _angry_ with the way you were being treated, so he called Cardassia…”

“And Starfleet’s _allowing_ this?” Julian asked in a quiet voice. “They _have_ translators…”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok nodded, “They’re also interested in trying to get Cardassia into the Federation,” she replied thoughtfully. “If the Castellan of Cardassia is willing to consider joining the Federation in exchange for your health and safety being taken more seriously, Starfleet is going to play their part. Castellan knows that he’ll have to be diplomatic and submit to all sorts of diplomatic functions, but he is going to do what he can to help you and others affected by this Dominion experimentation first.”

“Will I get as ill as Admiral Grayson?” Julian asked in a quiet voice. “She _doesn’t_ look well.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok looked concerned, “I think your continued lack of emotions and physical struggles means you might already be on your way there, but you might be unique because of your enhancements,” she explained in a concerned voice. “President Zife assigned Martha to look after Starfleet’s Cardassian guests, but as you can see…Martha needs to rest. Can we keep this between us?”

Julian nodded, “You might be as unwell as you’re going to get because of your enhancements and the hysterectomy, but I _can’t_ be sure,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok replied softly. “As far as getting _better_ …”

“I know it may never happen,” Julian admitted softly. “I might be this _lifeless mess_ forever…”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok frowned, “I can run more tests if you’d like,” she offered. “There has to be _something_ that can allow me to get that medication for you. Starfleet _can’t_ keep you like this…”

A wave of tiredness suddenly filled Julian, “I should _rest_ ,” he spoke softly. “I’ve worn myself out.”

Without waiting for a response, Julian made his way to his and Elim’s bedroom and got into bed for a sleep. As he got settled, Elim came into the room carrying Ricky. Ricky immediately reached outwards.

“Ricky wants to nap with you,” Elim spoke in a quiet voice. “I have work to do and so I’ll be right here beside the two of you. If you want to nap by yourself, though, I can put Ricky with Dax and go…”

Julian sighed, “It’s _fine_ ,” he replied tonelessly, watching as Elim got on the bed and set Ricky between them before pulling a work stylus from his pocket. “Elim, what if I don’t get any better than _this_?”

“Then I’ll love you _as you are_ ,” Elim replied, his eyes on his work. “I’ll _always_ love you… _unconditionally_.”

Nodding, Julian’s attention was suddenly drawn to Ricky when the infant started touching his face and babbling whilst sporting a smile. _If only Dax could join us_. Julian thought to himself. _Hopefully soon_.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**San Francisco, California**

“The Castellan is _here on Earth_?!” Officer Marratt replied in a stunned voice, his eyes wide as he sat in the foyer of the boarding house with Myrina and President Zife. “ _Why_ did he come _here_?!”

President Zife sighed, “It’s _complicated_ ,” she explained in a formal voice. “Needless to say, now that Admiral Ross is in custody and Doctor Girani has been extradited, there is no need for your services anymore,” she explained calmly. “Captain Staveli, what you have done to help capture Admiral Ross has freed you from arrest by the Federation. What _Cardassia_ does with you is up to their authorities.”

“I will have to discuss that with the Castellan,” Officer Marratt replied in a quiet voice, his expression concerned because he had secretly grown fond of Captain Staveli during the time they had spent together and he didn’t wish her to go to prison. “When will the trial for Admiral Ross be held?”

President Zife sighed, “We _don’t know_ yet,” she admitted. “ _Things_ have come up…”

Officer Marratt scowled and President Zife returned the scowl, “Is there a _problem_?” she asked firmly.

“No _problem_ , President ,” Myrina spoke up in a calming voice, offering a smile. “Thank you for visiting us and letting us know that our work here is done. Officer Marratt shall talk to the Castellan about me.”

President Zife’s expression suddenly softened and she nodded before rising from her chair. She smiled at Myrina, but gave Officer Marratt a look before leaving the boarding house to return to the Starfleet properties. Myrina gave Officer Marratt a look, but he ignored her because he was much too upset.

“I find this whole turn of events _suspicious_ and _disturbing_ ,” Officer Marratt spoke in a quiet voice. “Does nobody _care_ that an innocent man, a man who also happens to be the husband of a respected Cardassian citizen, was tortured and nearly killed by a Starfleet Admiral? Instead of swift justice, the man who helped rescue him is sitting in _jail_ while Doctor Bashir himself is currently on _house arrest_!”

Myrina sighed anxiously, “We should see if Keiko O’Brien will talk to us about what’s going on,” she spoke in a quiet voice, sighing. “Since the Castellan is here, turning me in will be easier for you.”

Officer Marratt sighed, “I…I find myself _reluctant_ ,” he admitted softly. “I’ve _enjoyed_ your company.”

“I _broke_ Cardassian law by participating in the abduction of Doctor Julian Bashir-Garak,” Myrina replied in a submissive voice, her expression penitent. “I _must_ be held accountable for it. You know that”

Officer Marratt’s expression turned unusually somber, “At least allow me to speak to the Castellan on your behalf to see if there cannot be some sort of alternative arrangement worked out,” he offered in a concerned voice as the door opened and President Zife came back into the foyer. “You _again_?”

“ _Yes_ ,” President Zife replied in a calm, but firm voice. “As I was leaving, I decided that it would be _unkind_ of me not to offer you _secure_ quarters until you can meet with your Castellan. He’ll come here for a tour of the Starfleet properties and you can talk then. If you’ll get your things and follow me, I’ll _escort_ you over to your quarters. I assure you, you’ll be _quite_ comfortable…”

Officer Marratt’s eyes widened in shock, quickly realizing that he was going to be put under his own version of house arrest so he couldn’t snoop and potentially disrupt things. He rose silently and retreated to the ground floor room he had been using since his arrival. Having not brought much with him, it wasn’t hard to pack his things and return to the foyer without delay.

Myrina looked very much as if she wanted to speak, but Officer Marratt gave her a look to keep quiet so she wouldn’t get arrested too. Knowing that the Cardassian officer cared about her, she remained silent until the two were gone and then she hurried over to the comms. She intended to call Keiko about it because calling anyone else might lead to more trouble.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

The cells in Starfleet Security were quiet and lonely, but Miles was simply grateful he wasn’t anywhere worse and that he was being treated humanely. He didn’t regret helping Julian and he had accepted that doing so would probably lead to him going to jail, but it had been _worth it_. As he sat on the bench in his cell, Miles found himself wondering how Julian was doing now.

“…This is _preposterous_!” an angry voice suddenly filled the air. “I haven’t done anything illegal!”

Miles frowned when President Zife came into view with a Security officer and an angry looking Cardassian who was carrying a bag over one shoulder, “Officer Marratt?” Miles asked softly.

“I _know_ you _don’t trust_ Starfleet or the Federation, but I will _not_ have you and your paranoid nature ruining any chance of diplomatic relations between the Federation and Cardassia,” President Zife spoke in a firm voice, a scowl on her face. “When your Castellan is available to keep you in line, I’ll release you to him. I simply _cannot_ have loose cannons _uncontained._ ”

Officer Marratt scoffed, “Do you even _care_ about Julian Bashir-Garak?” he asked coldly.

“Julian Bashir-Garak is currently recovering from his experience at an undisclosed location and will be brought to San Francisco when it is time for his court-martial and time for Admiral Ross’s trial,” President Zife explained in a firm voice, scowling at the Cardassian. “Are you _really so naïve_ to think that we have endless resources that we can drop everything else just to cater to the needs of one man? We suffered _monumental losses_ in the Dominion War, Officer Marratt!”

Officer Marratt scoffed, “ _So did Cardassia_ ,” he snarled. “And you don’t see us _abandoning_ the well-being of one of our own. A _Starfleet Admiral_ committed a _most heinous_ crime and he _absolutely needs_ to be held accountable, but is Starfleet doing that? _No!_ _Why not_?!”

“When Officer Marratt has been processed, escort him to one of the longer-term cells,” President Zife snapped in a stern voice before glaring at Miles. “And _you_ … _mind your business_!”


	12. Miscarriage of Justice

**Three Days Later**

**San Francisco, California**

Castellan Dramok was _not_ happy when he arrived in San Francisco, as he had been told by Keiko O’Brien that President Zife had detained Officer Marratt without cause at Starfleet Security. He and Elim had petitioned to get Officer Marratt released, but Starfleet Security had _refused_ to take their calls.

In the three days since Officer Marratt’s detainment, meanwhile, Starfleet had sent the data from Admiral Ross’s experiment over to Legate Garak along with a headset with the expectation that he would translate it from Dominion script. Elim had reluctantly begun the translation work because he knew if he didn’t, Starfleet might take it out on Julian, Ricky, Dax, or Julian’s parents.

Castellan Dramok, however, had _not_ assisted in the translation work and had instead focused on planning for a quick escape from Earth. He had also helped his wife care for her sister at the Bashir’s residence so that the gravity of Admiral Grayson’s illness would remain off Starfleet’s radar because to him, sick people deserved dignity. Even though he himself wasn’t well, Julian also did what he could to help while juggling himself, Ricky, and Dax. It wasn’t a perfect arrangement, but it worked.

Even though the Cardassian intended to play nice and go through the motions, he had seen enough of how Starfleet and the Federation worked already that he didn’t like it. Cardassia had lost so much in the war and didn’t need dealings with organizations who used unethical methods to get things accomplished. He knew Cardassia of the past had been that way, but Cardassia under his rule _would be different_. It was _only_ for Julian’s sake that he was continuing to play the role of diplomat at all.

“Jhanathan?”

Castellan Dramok pulled himself from his thoughts and gazed at Dr. Grayson-Dramok, who was standing next to him wearing simple, very modest formalwear because she was his spouse and legally allowed to join him on the diplomatic tours if she wished. She had left Galen to keep an eye on Julian that day.

“What’s on your mind?” Dr. Grayson-Dramok asked softly, frowning. “Thinking of Cardassia?”

Castellan Dramok found he could not lie, “ _Always_ ,” he replied softly. “But this is _too public a place_ for conversation about that, my dearest. Someone could overhear us and use our words against us.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok nodded as Admiral Grayson approached the shuttle wearing a fresh Starfleet uniform and looking rested. Admiral Grayson had returned to San Francisco the day before to prepare for the Castellan’s arrival with a promise she would send thanks along for the Bashir’s hospitality.

“Welcome to San Francisco, Castellan and Lady Dramok,” Admiral Grayson spoke in a formal voice, her expression neutral. “President Zife has asked me to escort you to Starfleet Command straightaway.”

Castellan Dramok nodded, silently acquiescing to President Zife’s agenda even though he wanted to storm over to Starfleet Security, get Officer Dramok released, and talk to Chief O’Brien. He had spoken to Elim and Galen privately the other day and had plans in place for when things went south, which he knew they would, but he had to play the part of the pleasant, compliant diplomat in the meantime.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Wellington, New Zealand**

“Legate, there was a package for your husband on the transporter pad,” Galen commented, holding the package out as he approached the table where Elim was working on translations with the headset on.

Elim looked up from his work and frowned at the container that Galen was holding. It looked to be a secure container that was used for transporting fragile, sensitive materials; it was a type of container that Elim had often seen on Deep Space Nine and he wondered _why_ one would be sent to Julian.

“Last time I saw your husband, he was in the backyard,” Galen observed softly. “It’s a warm evening.”

Elim sighed and quickly discarded the headset before getting up, “He _naps_ , but he doesn’t _rest_ anymore,” he spoke in a concerned voice as he opened the box and saw hyposprays and a PADD.

Galen’s eyes narrowed and Elim quickly hurried into the yard, frowning when he saw Julian laying on the grass with his gaze directed at the sky. He was wearing nothing but pajamas and seemed lifeless.

“Julian, a box containing _hyposprays and a PADD_ has arrived for you,” Elim spoke calmly.

Julian slowly sat up and looked at him before getting to his feet without a word. Elim followed Julian inside and watched as Julian looked at the box for himself, “My _medication_ ,” Julian finally said softly.

“Perhaps we ought to let Galen look it over _before_ you try it,” Elim spoke. “To ensure it’s safe?”

Julian didn’t hesitate, however, to pick up one of the hyposprays, “I _want_ to be the Julian you miss and want me to be and I _want_ to be _myself_ again,” he replied softly, sighing as he injected himself in the neck. “If it’s poisoned, you and Doctor Dastra should know shortly. The meds were fast acting before.”

While the two Cardassians watched, Julian activated the PADD and his eyes suddenly widened.

_Dr. Bashir-Garak,_

_This supply of medication should last you for a good while if you go by the doses you did when you took it on Deep Space Nine. The formula for the medication is also in this letter so you can make more as you need it. I thank you and your parents for showing concern, hospitality, and discretion about my condition. Just because I am unwell, however, doesn’t mean you need to be. May this help you heal._

_Warm regards,_

_Admiral Martha Grayson_

Elim’s eyes were wide as he read the message over Julian’s shoulder. He was stunned that Admiral Grayson had suddenly sent Julian a large quantity of his medication with minimal explanation and while he was grateful, he was also suspicious. What motives did Admiral Grayson have for doing it?

_“Elim.”_

Elim suddenly found his face being touched by Julian, who was sporting a tired expression, “Oh, _Elim_ ,” Julian spoke in a tone filled with tiredness. “I’ve _missed_ feeling anything for you, but I can now.”

“You’re feeling emotion _already_?” Elim replied, secretly pleased that Julian was touching him in an affectionate manner after being a lifeless robot for so long. “You sound _very, very tired_ , my dear.”

Julian nodded, “Oh, I _am_ ,” he replied in a sleepy voice, a smile appearing. “But I can _feel_ again.”

“Perhaps a hot bath and a good rest will help,” Elim suggested softly. “It’s been a _long_ day.”

Julian thought for a moment, “I would absolutely _love_ it if I could just go to bed with my husband by my side and sleep in his arms,” he replied in a quiet voice. “Do you think that _might_ be a possibility?”

Galen looked amused and Elim found himself nodding even though he had been told the translations were the upmost priority, “ _Yes_ , my dear doctor,” Elim spoke softly, smirking. “I think it might be.”

Continuing to smile, Elim packed up the medication and carried it while Julian led the way to their room. Galen, however, stayed in the kitchen. The Cardassian physician was relieved to finally have some time and space to himself after having to be around people ever since being dragged to Earth from Cardassia.

Sighing heavily, Galen sat at the table and ended up falling asleep using his arms as a pillow.

* * *

* * *

* * *

**San Francisco, California**

President Zife offered a cordial smile to Castellan Dramok and Admiral Grayson, but looked surprised to see Dr. Grayson-Dramok accompany them into the Starfleet Oval Office. She had expected the doctor to remain in New Zealand to monitor Julian and make sure he or Elim didn’t do anything disruptive.

“Is something the _matter_ , Madame President?” Castellan Dramok asked, catching President Zife’s look.

President Zife sighed, “I wasn’t expecting to see Doctor Grayson here,” she admitted calmly, her expression neutral. “I was expecting she would stay with Doctor Bashir and monitor him.”

“Doctor Grayson is also known as Lady Dramok and as she is the spouse of the Castellan, she has the option of accompanying me whenever I carry out my duties,” Castellan Dramok replied, secretly irritated that this woman would dare question his wife’s right to be present. “She _chose_ to accompany me today and so I asked Doctor Dastra to monitor Doctor Bashir-Garak. I do hope that her presence is no issue?”

President Zife looked taken aback, “Well, since you’re here, Doctor, I was hoping you could update me on Doctor Bashir’s progress?” she replied in a curious tone. “Admiral Ross has been asking about him.”

Admiral Grayson frowned, but Dr. Grayson-Dramok looked unimpressed, “I haven’t been able to get Doctor Bashir medication that will help him recover,” she replied coldly. “Starfleet won’t allow it.”

“An Augment shouldn’t _need_ medication to assist with recovery from illness or injury,” President Zife replied in a calm, almost smug voice, glaring at Dr. Grayson-Dramok. “We’re still recovering from the Dominion War and that resource can be better used to help member worlds with their people…”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok scoffed, but said nothing, “Speaking of being helpful, why did you feel it _necessary_ to arrest one of my men?” Castellan Dramok asked in a stern voice, frowning. “Did he break a law?”

“No, but he could have been a security risk had I left him to his own devices,” President Zife replied in a calm voice even though she was seething with anger inside. “Don’t _worry_ , he’s been treated _humanely_.”

Castellan Marratt scowled, “Officer Marratt is _not_ an animal,” he replied coldly. “ _Release_ him.”

“I can arrange that, but I do have some _bad news_ about Admiral Ross’s trial,” President Zife replied in a formal voice. “The Federation Council has to put it on hold for the time being because Admiral Ross says he has an idea as to where the Monroe might be, but he won’t share information unless…”

Castellan Marratt’s scowl deepened, “So Doctor Bashir-Garak being kidnapped twice, tortured nearly to death, forcibly impregnated, and studied like a lab rat means _nothing_ to you or them!?” he asked coldly.

“The Federation Council is perfectly willing to release Doctor Bashir from his obligation to Starfleet without any fanfare so he can get on with his life if he wishes in the meantime,” President Zife replied simply, her expression stern. “It’s something you’ll need to talk to him about when we’re done here.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sighed, her expression somber because she had felt like Starfleet would end up finding a way to get out of holding Admiral Ross accountable for his actions. She wanted to ask Captain Sisko why he hadn’t rescued Julian sooner and why he had only to leave him to a system that didn’t care about bringing his tormentors to justice. Captain Sisko, however, wasn’t there…he was doing his duty.

“I am _quite_ interested in continuing the Botanical Restoration Project,” Castellan Dramok spoke in a quiet voice, knowing that there was no point in discussing the matter further because Starfleet would simply offer more excuses he was not interested in hearing. “Will Keiko O’Brien and Legate Garak be able to continue with their work on Cardassia once matters are settled here?”

President Zife nodded, “I wonder if, perhaps, Chief O’Brien’s sentence could be commuted to Cardassia?” Castellan Dramok asked calmly. “From what I understand of the penal colony in New Zealand, non-violent inmates there participate in work release programs anyway and Cardassia very much has a _need_ for _skilled_ workers. I know he’s been punished under _Starfleet_ law, but…”

“I’ll have to take that up with the head of Starfleet Command in _private,_ ” President Zife replied firmly.

Castellan Dramok sighed, “So _what_ does Starfleet have to offer besides broken promises and excuses that could benefit Cardassia?” he asked, seemingly unimpressed. “Everyone’s been affected by this terrible war, but it doesn’t appear as if we’re coming to an agreement on anything mutually beneficial.”

“Castellan, I feel that the Federation and Starfleet are being _very generous_ where Doctor Bashir is concerned considering he should have never been allowed to join Starfleet in the first place given his status,” President Zife replied firmly. “He was on _very_ thin ice to begin with after his status was revealed and the incident with Luther Sloan and his unauthorized trip to Cardassia were the tipping points. It’s good that he found his place there so well. I see _no need_ to punish him for starting a new life.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok suddenly felt as if she had to leave, as she felt as if Starfleet was doing nothing more than devaluing a person she had come to see as a friend and she might act out in anger if she didn’t walk out. She silently turned and made her way out of the office and outside into the foyer, ignoring the Security officers as she sat on a couch and waited for her husband and sister. Suddenly, another officer came into view from an adjoining hallway and over to one of the Security officers.

The two officers whispered before looking at Dr. Grayson-Dramok briefly. One of the officers then came over to her and she sat up straight immediately, wondering if she was somehow in trouble.

“Excuse me, Doctor Grayson, I was wondering if you had a moment to respond to a situation in the long-term Security cells?” the officer asked softly. “One of our long termers says he doesn’t feel good…”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok quickly stood up, “Do you have an Emergency Response med-kit over there?” she asked in a concerned voice, her doctor’s instinct’s quickly kicking in. “I don’t mind helping out.”

The officer nodded and Dr. Grayson-Dramok followed him back down the hallway, frowning when she quickly found herself in the long-term cell block of Starfleet Security. To her surprise, she was led to a cell where a guard was kneeling next to a semi-conscious Miles O’Brien, who was laying on his bunk with a hand over his chest. His eyes were closed, he was sweaty, and his breaths were weak and ragged. The forcefield was down and the entire cellblock was very quiet, indicating that something was wrong.

“Get me the emergency kit,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok ordered firmly as she entered the cell. “Chief?”

A faint gasp escaped Miles’s lips, “I can’t _breathe_ ,” Miles managed to gasp weakly. “My _chest_ … _tight_.”

Dr. Grayson-Dramok quickly found the emergency kit passed to her and so she opened it, taking care to scan Miles carefully, “Your blood pressure’s elevated,” she explained. “Are you having other symptoms?”

Miles, however, didn’t respond and Dr. Grayson-Dramok was horrified to find that Miles had passed out cold, “Initiate an emergency transport to Starfleet Medical for myself and Chief O’Brien!” she ordered.

As the two dematerialized, Admiral Ross couldn’t help but smirk to himself as he sat in the next cell because he had spent the allotted exercise time over the past few days making Miles think that Julian was dying and Dax had died and that his fall from grace had been for _nothing_. Miles had spent his nights talking to himself, crying, and having quiet panic attacks while moaning that he hadn’t acted fast enough and Admiral Ross had found it amusing that it had been so _easy_ to manipulate the soft-hearted man.

What Admiral Ross didn’t see, however, was that Officer Marratt was glaring at him from a cell across the aisle because the Cardassian was _perfectly aware_ what the Admiral had been doing to Miles and was disgusted by it. Officer Marratt was of course aware that Miles had participated in massacring Cardassians, but he also knew from the Castellan that the man had thrown away a decorated Starfleet career to help rescue Julian Bashir, so the man couldn’t be all bad. What O’Brien needed was _help_ , not _manipulation and mockery_. Starfleet didn’t seem to be doing _anything_ but _exploiting_ his weaknesses.

A Starfleet Security officer suddenly came over to Officer Marratt’s cell, “Your Castellan is on his way to release you,” he explained in a firm voice. “He wants to ensure that you haven’t been harmed, so we’ll escort him here before we release you into his custody. I do hope your stay has been pleasant?”

Admiral Ross’s eyes narrowed: The Castellan was coming to the cell block? Maybe with his arrival would come the opportunity to really discover what had become of his experiment and all of the work he had put into it. He wanted to continue the work, but Julian Bashir had been weaker than expected, so the new subject might have to be a different Human…or even a different species altogether

There would be time to refine his plan for a new experiment once he was back out in space, but knowing how the current one turned out would help him determine how to proceed. Perhaps the Castellan might drop hints and Admiral Ross would use those hints to make his own plans succeed.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

“…Miles?”

A hand touched Miles’s face and he let out a weak moan as he opened his eyes and found himself staring up at Dr. Grayson-Dramok and an anxious looking Keiko, “ _Miles_ ,” Keiko breathed anxiously.

Miles sighed weakly, “What happened?” he asked in a tired voice. “I was in my cell…then _nothing_.”

“You passed out from a _pretty major_ anxiety attack,” Dr. Grayson-Dramok explained in a concerned voice, frowning. “I’ve already put the order in to keep you here a couple of days for observation and I hope Starfleet follows that, but they’re not obliged to. I’m really concerned by your readings, though, as it looks like you haven’t been getting a lot of sleep and your stress levels have been off the charts…”

Miles frowned, “During exercise periods in the yard, Admiral Ross told me Julian’s sick and Dax didn’t make it and that I was a _fool_ for sacrificing my career to try and help,” he managed to say weakly.

Keiko looked horrified, but Miles quickly closed his eyes because he was very tired and didn’t want to keep talking about it, “Is that true?” Keiko asked in a hushed voice, gazing at the doctor worriedly.

Dr. Grayson-Dramok sighed, “No, but I’m _not authorized_ to prove it,” she replied softly. “I’d have to talk to Starfleet because _they’re_ the ones who are monitoring Doctor Bashir and his family right now.”

“Maybe Starfleet isn’t the _best_ place for Miles anymore if it’s done _this_ to him,” Keiko replied as she sat at her husband’s bedside. “I’m feeling _guilty_ about being involved in a project that might have me travelling all over space while he sits in the penal colony in New Zealand. He doesn’t _deserve_ to be without visits and his is a non-violent crime, so he can _have_ visits if he _wants_ them… _Oh, Miles_.”

Keiko sighed anxiously and gently adjusted Miles’s blanket, prompting Dr. Grayson-Dramok to quietly exit the room to allow them privacy. She silently went over to a comms terminal and made a call.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Starfleet Command**

President Zife had only entertained them for a few moments more before dismissing them and ordering Admiral Grayson to entertain the Dramoks. Castellan Dramok had expressed concerns as to where his wife had gone, so Admiral Grayson had taken him back to her office to see if they could locate her.

“ _Incoming call for Admiral Grayson from Starfleet Medical_ ,” a voice announced as Admiral Grayson and Castellan Dramok neared the desk. “ _Incoming call for Admiral Grayson from Starfleet Medical_.”

Admiral Grayson hurried to her desk and activated the viewscreen, frowning when she saw her sister on the screen, “ _I need you to contact Doctor Bashir-Garak and arrange for him to contact Chief O’Brien as soon as possible_ ,” Doctor Grayson-Dramok replied firmly, her expression serious. “ _Admiral Ross apparently shares exercise time with Chief O’Brien and has made the Chief believe that Doctor Bashir is sick and that Dax didn’t survive. Chief O’Brien’s been so upset over it that he had a bad anxiety attack_ …”

“ _Don’t_ tell me you admitted him to Starfleet Medical,” Admiral Grayson spoke irritably, a sigh in her voice as she quietly groaned. “Starfleet’s due to ship him to New Zealand by tomorrow night.”

A scoff filled the air and Admiral Grayson looked up just in time to see Castellan Dramok, who was extremely disgusted with Starfleet’s behavior, storm out of the office. Admiral Grayson looked back down at the screen, extremely tired and cross because the meeting with President Zife and Castellan Dramok had gone so badly. Now, she had just let slip Starfleet’s plans for Miles O’Brien when those were supposed to be kept confidential. When the Council found out what she had done, they would throw a fit and so would President Zife. On top of that, they would eventually find out about her sending the medication to Dr. Bashir and the formula for it after being told that he wasn’t to receive _any_ help.

Sighing heavily, Admiral Grayson sat down in her chair, “I cannot do _anything_ about Starfleet’s orders,” she replied in a quiet, terse voice, her expression lifeless. “Your husband just stormed out of here.”

“ _How badly did the meeting go_?” Dr. Grayson-Dramok asked softly. “ _You look very tired_.”

Admiral Grayson sighed, “I _am_ very tired,” she replied quietly. “Unfortunately for me, this is the _price_ I paid for being one of the few survivors of the Spokane’s demise. That and being condemned to _this_ …”

“ _Did you want me to come over and visit you?”_ Dr. Grayson-Dramok asked softly, frowning at her.

The door suddenly opened and Castellan Dramok came back in, “If it’s not too much trouble, Admiral, I would like to go to Starfleet Security and rescue Officer Marratt from jail,” he said in a curt voice.

“Your wife is on the comm,” Admiral Grayson replied as she stood up. “You two can talk about that.”

Castellan Dramok gave her a look, but moved over to the computer and focused on his beautiful wife while Admiral Grayson moved over to the replicator to make herself some tea. She got her tea and sat down on her couch, sipping the medicinal brew as she listened to her only living relatives talk with a love that she hadn’t felt since she and her sister served together on the Spokane. _Oh_ , how she would _miss_ it.

Sighing heavily, Admiral Grayson quietly accessed the computer that was on the arm of the couch and discreetly inputted an order that would delay Chief O’Brien’s transfer to New Zealand. She wasn’t a doctor, but she could order him monitored and assessed to see if that sentence would prove detrimental to his health. It wasn’t much, but it would be enough to buy the O’Briens needed time.

Once the call ended, Admiral Grayson silently rose and Castellan Dramok to Starfleet Security without so much of a mention of what she had done. _Everyone_ would find out about her actions soon enough.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Wellington, New Zealand**

Weak cries echoed through the baby monitor that sat on the stand next to the bed where Julian and Elim were sleeping. Elim let out a tired groan, but didn’t wake because he was exhausted and had no strength or desire to get up. Julian, however, woke immediately and slowly got out of bed.

“ _Rest_ , Elim; I’ll take care of it,” Julian whispered softly. “I’m _finally_ able to be a parent again, so I will.”

Elim mumbled incoherently, but remained asleep and so Julian went to the room that Ricky and Dax shared after donning a housecoat. He wore his slipper boots most of the time now, except when he was bathing, so he didn’t need to put them on, but it was now cold enough to need a robe. _Unusually_ cold.

Ricky was awake and sporting a frightened expression on his face, so Julian scooped him up and carried him over to the chamber where Dax was sleeping peacefully before sitting with him in the corner rocking chair. Ricky immediately quieted and looked up at Julian quizzically before smiling at him.

“I think it’s a _little_ too early for you to be up, my Ricky,” Julian spoke softly, sighing because he was still very tired even though he was back to feeling emotions. “Let’s say we go back to bed _together_ , hmm?”

Ricky’s smile quickly turned into a yawn and as Julian lifted the toddler, the comms terminal began to beep, “Incoming call from San Francisco,” an automated voice spoke. “Do you accept the call?”

Sighing, Julian shifted Ricky to his shoulder and quickly went over to the terminal, “Put the call through to here,” he ordered softly, frowning when he saw Castellan Dramok’s face fill the screen. “Castellan.”

“ _Doctor Bashir-Garak, it’s good to see you on your feet_ ,” Castellan Dramok spoke with a sigh, his expression filled with irritation. “ _Once I rescue Officer Marratt from Starfleet Security, I will be returning to New Zealand and deciding whether or not to return to Cardassia. The meeting with Starfleet did not go well and I see little point in keeping this farce of a visit going. I do have some news for you, however.”_

Julian frowned, but didn’t say anything, “ _The Federation Council has to put Admiral Ross’s trial on hold for the time being because Admiral Ross says he has an idea as to where the Monroe might be, but he won’t share information unless he’s allowed to be involved,”_ Castellan Dramok explained, sighing. “ _I tried to fight it, but Starfleet doesn’t value you. President Zife did say, though, that the Council is willing to release you from your obligation to Starfleet without fanfare so you can simply get on with your life_.”

A rush of anger and sadness filled Julian, “Does Sisko know?” he asked angrily. “What about Miles?”

“ _Chief O’Brien’s destination right now is the penal colony in New Zealand and that doesn’t appear to be negotiable_ ,” Castellan Dramok replied in a somber voice. “ _Captain Sisko is still out in space_ …”

Julian’s frown deepened, but he wasn’t surprised because he knew Starfleet would find some way to absolve Admiral Ross of responsibility for his crimes, “Thank you for informing me, Castellan,” he said in as polite a tone as he could manage. “I’ll discuss things with Elim and my parents when they wake up.”

Castellan Dramok nodded, “ _No matter what happens, Doctor Bashir-Garak, you will always have a place on Cardassia_ ,” he replied in a reassuring voice. “ _Now, I must go and see to the release of my officer_.”

The screen went black and Julian silently retreated to the chair with Ricky in his lap, too shaken, angry, and sad to speak or sleep. He sat there in silence for what seemed like an eternity before he closed his eyes and allowed tears to stream freely down his face. How could Starfleet simply _dismiss_ his suffering?

“Julian?”

Julian sighed as he opened his eyes and saw Elim standing there looking groggy, but Elim’s exhaustion quickly turned to concern when he saw the tears. The Cardassian wandered over to the rocking chair and scooped Ricky up, not saying a word as he put the toddler back in bed and came back to the chair.

Swallowing hard, Julian rose and found himself unable to look his husband in the eye, “The Castellan just called here,” he spoke in a quiet, somber voice. “The Federation Council has to put Admiral Ross’s trial on hold for the time being because Admiral Ross says he has an idea as to where the Monroe might be, but he won’t share information unless he’s allowed to be involved. Castellan did try to fight for me, but President Zife’s response was an offer to release me from my obligation to Starfleet without fanfare…”

Elim’s eyes widened in shock and anger, both of which melted into compassion and love because he could see that Julian was highly upset over it. Sighing gently, the Cardassian embraced his husband with a determination to love him come what may.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of 'Endurance', y'all! The next story in the series will be called 'Journey.'
> 
> Summary of 'Journey': With justice not on their side and mercy seemingly out of reach, the Bashir-Garak family and all they hold dear to their hearts begin a journey into an uncertain future.


End file.
